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Why is life no longer exciting?


andyb

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If you're bored then fresh air, mild exercise and pleasant scenery won't fix it. Might be possible to tolerate that activity once the other issues have been dealt with.

Hiking with a friend you have good conversations with would be a good one.

This, having a few good friends that you hang out with on a weekly basis. But OP did say he was bored with relationships and friendships as well... You might be around boring people, NDB

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I have similar problems, I use google for real basic things, 'how to deal with depression,' look at self help videos on youtube (coach Corey Wayne), read self help books, find my personal life purpose and work on it, be positive, see things how they are, not better, not worse, try new things and realize a change will take time and you go step by step and if things slide be patient. I try to see my life like a video game, I want to level up here, I want to level up there and grind at it. The first step to being kinda good at something is sucking at it. Practice and repetition open all doors to you. Also personal responsibility is important, don't expect anyone to rescue you (not saying you are).

 

Also recognize things that make you happy (aphex twin is one for me) and make time for that stuff in your life.

 

We have more potential than we realize, but it takes time to unlock and I sincerely believe when we do, and we have to earn it, amazing things can happen.

 

Have your own vision for your life, don't take someone else's without questioning it.

 

I found exercise/physical activity are key also.

 

Hope this isn't all too sappy, but it's your life, do whatever you need to do to live a quality life because we are more or less scenery in other people's lives, can't be hung up too much on what anyone thinks.

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life isn't shit or amazing. it just is... so if you feel like that, it's your own fault... so find a new purpose to live it good.

 

This is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

 

If you're able to post on the internet on a computer and listen to music then your life is more amazing than most. Quit whining and go outside you child.

 

Wait, no. THIS is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

My advice is to just change things up a bit. Muster whatever motivation you have to pursue some interests that may be dormant for you.

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Scenery in other people's lives is kind of a sad existence. I'm not sure if that's particularly enlightened or even a healthy mentality. I'd assume you learn things from other people right? Well it's pretty likely people learn from you too. Life is about sharing. I'd go as far as to say, if you aren't hung up on what other people think then you're selfish. Obviously it's a waste of time to care about people who don't care about others but that doesn't mean you're entitled to do the same.

 

We've been sold this idea of the individual. More and more people live in their own bubble and don't consider the influence they have or could have.

 

"Everything is geared towards self-sufficiency. Fuck that. For me, the target is to learn how to communicate with other people, which is the hardest thing, after all. What you should be doing is learn how to live with other human beings."-Bjork

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life isn't shit or amazing. it just is... so if you feel like that, it's your own fault... so find a new purpose to live it good.

 

This is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

 

If you're able to post on the internet on a computer and listen to music then your life is more amazing than most. Quit whining and go outside you child.

 

Wait, no. THIS is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

My advice is to just change things up a bit. Muster whatever motivation you have to pursue some interests that may be dormant for you.

 

 

yeah you basically said the same I said butwith sweeter words, but yeah people shouldn't be that direct (?)

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Start growing plants; I find that watching something grow and thrive and feeling as though I was somewhat instrumental in it's success as a thriving being (eg, watering, fertilising etc) is incredibly rewarding. Start with vegetables if you are more interested in plants with a utilitarian tip. I'm obsessed with Orchids and carnivorous plants myself.

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I think travel might broaden my perspective

 

hugely. exploring the real world outside of your comfort zone will help you develop as a human being.

 

seriously, get a Scrambler and take some long winding dirt roads with some friends. it's like reliving being a kid.

 

That last sentence especially. I often find periods of listlessness* can be combated with breaking away from the internet or tv or social media and simply pretending like I'm a kid again. Try looking at the world with that perspective: drive or bike down some new street or park. Find an old book or album and revisit it. Build something. Hell, just going outside to do chores is often relaxing. If your in an area with a community or college radio station, give it a listen. I'm still surprised by what I hear for the first time, new or old. There's the aspect of discovery and a perspective of seeing wonder and splendor in everyday things that can make a huge difference in how you feel day to day. You can get back to it, and believe me, everyone at some point gets lost and discouraged sometimes, as you feel now.

 

Also, life doesn't have fit some idealized vision or "typical" timeframe. You mention those things as if they were one-time shots or necessary steps. They aren't. And everyone's routes in life change and shift. There's times I feel like I would be completely content moving out to some sleepy mountain town and spending the rest of my life quite simply, but also very situated. There's times I feel like selling most of my stuff and travelling around another part of the world. Hell, I'm married now, and we're very close and fairly domestic in our lifestyle, but 10 years ago if you asked me if I'd ever see myself in that situation, I'd be shocked.

 

I wish you the best in your situation, and I'm no expert in any professional sense, but I hope you find yourself out of this. Know you're not alone.

 

*(In my case when work/lack of income is bumming me out, or I'm not in the mood for new music or art, or just kind down for what seems like no reason.)

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life isn't shit or amazing. it just is... so if you feel like that, it's your own fault... so find a new purpose to live it good.

 

This is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

 

If you're able to post on the internet on a computer and listen to music then your life is more amazing than most. Quit whining and go outside you child.

 

Wait, no. THIS is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

My advice is to just change things up a bit. Muster whatever motivation you have to pursue some interests that may be dormant for you.

 

 

Thanks for all of your kind words. A bit of tough love helps sometimes.

 

Start growing plants; I find that watching something grow and thrive and feeling as though I was somewhat instrumental in it's success as a thriving being (eg, watering, fertilising etc) is incredibly rewarding. Start with vegetables if you are more interested in plants with a utilitarian tip. I'm obsessed with Orchids and carnivorous plants myself.

 

I just replanted the dead African Violet in my terrarium with some kind of fern.

 

GJZH897.jpg

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Scenery in other people's lives is kind of a sad existence. I'm not sure if that's particularly enlightened or even a healthy mentality. I'd assume you learn things from other people right? Well it's pretty likely people learn from you too. Life is about sharing. I'd go as far as to say, if you aren't hung up on what other people think then you're selfish. Obviously it's a waste of time to care about people who don't care about others but that doesn't mean you're entitled to do the same.

 

We've been sold this idea of the individual. More and more people live in their own bubble and don't consider the influence they have or could have.

 

"Everything is geared towards self-sufficiency. Fuck that. For me, the target is to learn how to communicate with other people, which is the hardest thing, after all. What you should be doing is learn how to live with other human beings."-Bjork

You are right, relationships are of paramount importance, but no one is going to make a relationship with every individual they pass on the street, it simply can't be done, that is what I mean by scenery.

 

i mean this in the sense of having willingness to take the chance to look silly in other people's eyes to realize your potential. Some ideas on improving your life may involve going through an awkward phase, starting over or doing what isn't commonly accepted, but you have to be true to your self and what you want out of life at the expense of possibly appearing silly to others. That's what I'm getting at. For instance if you want to meet new people they may or may not be open to meeting you, but if you don't try you will never know.

 

But these are just some ideas I am working with, something else may be better for you.

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Sounds like you need to switch some things up in your life, take up some new hobbies/interests, get outside more (long walks and bike rides with my headphones on really help me)... And if you relationships and friendships are exhausting you then drop 'em and if you're feeling lonely about that seek out new environments to meet different people.

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life isn't shit or amazing. it just is... so if you feel like that, it's your own fault... so find a new purpose to live it good.

 

This is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

 

If you're able to post on the internet on a computer and listen to music then your life is more amazing than most. Quit whining and go outside you child.

 

Wait, no. THIS is exactly how you shouldn't respond to this kind of topic.

My advice is to just change things up a bit. Muster whatever motivation you have to pursue some interests that may be dormant for you.

 

 

yeah you basically said the same I said butwith sweeter words, but yeah people shouldn't be that direct (?)

 

 

You both showed a clear lack of empathy.

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Those posts show a lack of sympathy but I think empathy is implied... nobody would say that stuff unless they've been there themselves.


Can't say that with 100% certainty about autopilot's post tho ha :-P


 

Scenery in other people's lives is kind of a sad existence. I'm not sure if that's particularly enlightened or even a healthy mentality. I'd assume you learn things from other people right? Well it's pretty likely people learn from you too. Life is about sharing. I'd go as far as to say, if you aren't hung up on what other people think then you're selfish. Obviously it's a waste of time to care about people who don't care about others but that doesn't mean you're entitled to do the same.

 

We've been sold this idea of the individual. More and more people live in their own bubble and don't consider the influence they have or could have.

 

"Everything is geared towards self-sufficiency. Fuck that. For me, the target is to learn how to communicate with other people, which is the hardest thing, after all. What you should be doing is learn how to live with other human beings."-Bjork

You are right, relationships are of paramount importance, but no one is going to make a relationship with every individual they pass on the street, it simply can't be done, that is what I mean by scenery.

 

i mean this in the sense of having willingness to take the chance to look silly in other people's eyes to realize your potential. Some ideas on improving your life may involve going through an awkward phase, starting over or doing what isn't commonly accepted, but you have to be true to your self and what you want out of life at the expense of possibly appearing silly to others. That's what I'm getting at. For instance if you want to meet new people they may or may not be open to meeting you, but if you don't try you will never know.

 

But these are just some ideas I am working with, something else may be better for you.

 

Hrrmm fair enough. I just made a jump thinking you meant you're even scenery in the lives of loved ones.

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Do a 1080 backflip into a cascading nebular kaleidoscopic waterfall of your ancestors' hopes and dreams and come at me with this goddam defeatist attitude. I dare you.

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Very recognizable things in this thread. Sort of apathetic myself right now, almost no motivation to do anything, don't wanna get out of bed etc. I somehow have the feeling it'll pass eventually though, probably when I get work lol. Also, I'm not good at constantly bullshitting everybody around me and bullshitting myself, which always seems more or less required on this planet to get by,

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A few weeks back, I wrapped my belt around my neck to see how secure it would be........ because I felt like I'd seen all that I was meant to see.

 

If you ever think about killing yourself like that again, for the love of god, call a helpline, talk to someone, check into a mental hospital, whatever but DO NOT go through with it

 

In fact, consider seeking counselling now, even if you're feeling better

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... constantly bullshitting everybody around me and bullshitting myself... always seems more or less required on this planet to get by,

 

oh aye.

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NDB: You are not obliged to enjoy yourself, don't feel guilty for feeling bored - we live in a culture that tells us that our duty is to constantly enjoy and realise some kind of perfect lifestyle - don't accept these demands that are made of you

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Felt the same way at your age . I was also living in NZ at the time. My advice: Get out into the sun whenever you can, NZ is too cloudy. Try find a new hobby that it far removed from pop culture and current events and that doesn't rely heavily on other people or social gratification and that is not heavily emotionally charged either, for me it was learning about biology and science. Just do things you would normally not do and try take an interest in and enjoy simple things, you look again you are a few years older and doing something different and feeling okay.

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What do you do, NDB? Do you go to school or do you have a job?

I've been in and out of several jobs over the last few years and have tried studying. I'm currently unemployed and looking for work

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Scenery in other people's lives is kind of a sad existence. I'm not sure if that's particularly enlightened or even a healthy mentality. I'd assume you learn things from other people right? Well it's pretty likely people learn from you too. Life is about sharing. I'd go as far as to say, if you aren't hung up on what other people think then you're selfish. Obviously it's a waste of time to care about people who don't care about others but that doesn't mean you're entitled to do the same.

 

We've been sold this idea of the individual. More and more people live in their own bubble and don't consider the influence they have or could have.

 

"Everything is geared towards self-sufficiency. Fuck that. For me, the target is to learn how to communicate with other people, which is the hardest thing, after all. What you should be doing is learn how to live with other human beings."-Bjork

 

Agree with this, but I will disagree with your first post in this thread.

We fetishize youth in this culture. But many people achieve great things when they are well past 30.

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