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hot for baphomet

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About hot for baphomet

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    it's the deep end

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    the express lane of the mindway
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    stating my interests in a dialog box
  1. i have to go to a funeral right now. so that was my proverbial wad for the day. and look, kid, i didn't do that to be mean... i did that because everyone else is just telling you "it's good keep it up!" which is the equivalent of the smile and nod. i gave you substance and if you take what i said to heart, you'll have a better time in the future hanging out not just here, but anywhere where people make and discuss the making of music.
  2. ok sir, seeing as you're ignoring me because i made that inspiratonal jpg about you, i will do the lord's work here and explain to you why you got called pretensious early. now look, while i am about to technically be humorous at your expense, pay attention and you'll learn a few things: i sincerely doubt this took years to make. if it did, how did you make the other album/EP/whatever? were you working on like 30 tracks at once? i'll give you that you're technically solid at constructing the melodies and synths, but they're awfully vanilla. just about anyone regularly posting tracks in this sub-forum could make the drum beats for any given song in under five minutes if they were properly motivated. thanks for your permission to download this. i have tons (literally, by the 2000loads) of mp3s on my laptop hard drive here and you know what? i'd have a lot more peace of mind if i was given permission to download them. what does this have to do with your music? i mean, if you want to hear something that goes for that dystopian feel that would live up to this description, try "dead cities" by the future sound of london. ((YOU HAVE YOUR IMAGES HERE)) this is utterly ridiculous. have you ever bought a CD where it lists everyone's influences? even on press releases or whatever? i mean THE ARE NO PRESS RELEASES IN THE WORLD OF ELECTRONIC MUSIC MUCH LIKE THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL (ask tom hanks) let's go back to aphex twin with come to daddy / windowlicker ERA stuff, can you imagine on the warp website anywhere it listening who aphex was influenced by and the genres of music he encompasses? the music speaks for itself. note: i keep on using aphex twin as an example because he is the golden standard here: the fucking bulletin board is named after an aphex twin song ffs. TRACKLIST 01. Adore - Born In Debt (2:03) - going for anthemic. you start off with a peppy beat and league average synths, however, as it will be noted as a theme in your album, your drums only have that first intro part and then it kicks directly into a loop you use until the last 20 seconds or so when you ambient wank outro. there is no progression on the drum sequencing whatsoever. the drums only exist as a vehicle to bring us your synthwork. 02. Adore - Hopelessly Enslaved (1:32) - this track is more ambitious than many of the others, but it fails at it. it seems that you have this style where you lead us around with inspirational ambient wank for ~75-80% of a track then drop in the aggro part. in this case, the aggro parts and you have a retarded drum studder for 15-20 seconds before it goes away and your grating chainsaw synths go to work. as my mp3 player is on repeat one i can't help but notice that the stabby synths at the end of the cut are the same as they are a the beginning. once again, you only have two drum patterns. 03. Adore - Programmed From Start (3:13) - you have some decent synth playing, but that bass synth kind of shits all over it. you only have one drum beat in this entire song. however, you do have some talent at producing the synthwork so with experience i reckon you could get pretty good at this if you were to keep going. 04. Adore - Revolving On Fiction (1:54) - wow, circa 48 seconds into this you actually cut up teh drums to transition between parts! tally ho. outro is too excessive, suffering from post-ejaculatory ambientsynthwank at teh end. oh and the "check this out" sample to start is laughable =P 05. Adore - Controlled By A System (3:10) - you only use one drum beat for this entire song. also, what does the track title have to do with this song? 06. Adore - Illusion Of Participation (2:52) - THE AGGRO METAL DRUM AND BASS SONG WOO! you listed the flashbulb as an influence, and you are as to the flashbulb here as the flashbulb is to squarepusher in general. except you sound exactly like the flashbulb on this track. the drum beat never changes and that distortion is annoying, i mean, it only attacks the fidelity of what you're doing and imho that's probably the best aspect of your music in this early stage. if you make whole albums like this, you can have an army of lame girls worship you like they do the flashbulb. 07. Adore - Dreaming In Freedom (2:58) - decent track. it's a bit grandiose and i can tell you like your synthwork, and you did an admirable job of teasing the drums and the final drop is fine. i mean, i wouldn't buy this, but i could have it on in the background and i'd nod my head and keep on doing whatever i'm doing, sure. the problem is that it took ~1:50 to get there, and you know, that weird ambient ooh-ahh fest to a weird semi-drumbeat to back to oohing and ahhing, i mean, you'd have a better song if you limited the ooh ahh buildup to something like 20-30 seconds then went with teh drop you introduce at 1:50 or so. 08. Adore - Escape From Reality (1:16) - ambient wank. utterly pointless unless you're trying to fall asleep, at which point may i make a suggestion that you implant subliminal messages? 09. Adore - A New Beginning (3:10) - like many of your tracks, when i listen to them i expect the volume to go down and hear "your call is very important to us, please continue to hold on the line and a customer service representative will be with you shortly" 10. Adore - Option Of Choice (3:00) - the distortion that starts in at 1:22 is laughably bad. it's been said by other people in the meek "more variance plz" mode, but really, you can get a decent vanilla vibe going with the synths and pads, sure. this doesn't change the fact that your drums are the very definition of pedestrian. for all i know you downloaded a bunch of generic drum loops and used those, because there is nothing to suggest that you have done anything other than applying looped drums to tracks. in three minutes of this song there's only one main drum beat and two different variations of it, with the only difference being an extra snare in the same exact loop for the main (read: non intro/outro) part of the track. 11. Adore - Leaders From Before (3:18) 12. Adore - Those We Lost (1:46) 13. Adore - Selfish Beings (2:04) 14. Adore - Living A Nightmare (2:00) 15. Adore - Common Heritage (1:48) and the rest of these are either ambient wank or your typical song structure where you've got one drum beat with maybe a minor variation and just you playing the same synthesizer/s over and over and over. OVERALL: your album is really really repetitive and quite pointless. you'd be best served to take maybe the 2 or 3 best tracks off of this and make that a small web-only-EP or have them be the start of something more ambitious. you have to actually treat your drums as more than a formality to give you timing to play your synthesizers to. obviously at this juncture in your career you're more synthesizer oriented, but really man, what i said on track #9... pretty much all of your tracks could easily be envisioned as hold music. i mean if you wish to make commercial music for anonymous backgrounds and for telephone systems, you are surely on the path... but in terms of having the kind of dynamics that would push this into the realm of listening music? sorry sir, you come up short. i'm surprised you're not selling this on itunes, iadore. that's not even cute or clever in fact it makes you look like a WANNABE mac douche. not to mention, your bandcamp page prominently features a link to "donate" and the zip file has shortcuts to both BUY AND DONATE for this. part of me thinks this could be an elaborate joke just trying to take the piss out of the forum, either that or you're 17 and have no clue what you're doing. nobody would buy this album except for your mother or some commercial enterprise that would use these tracks for hold music or maybe like, local cable access television for backgrounds on the community access channel, or the village bulletin board slideshow that runs all day long when they dont televise board meetings or something. so there you have it, kid. there's the definitive take on your music and even though i did come off harsh at times, i took more time than anyone else on here to sit down and go through your music and your marketing and deconstruct you and your efforts. i hope you learn something from this. in case you're dense tho... THESIS STATEMENT: put away the notions of selling this, put away the notions of press-releases and artist bios because you're getting way ahead of yourself... i mean if you were sending this out to a record label, fine, but this isn't a record label. it's a music making community and while you do have some talent, you have a long long ways to go. you clearly see making music as a business and i think if you stick with this you'll be making vanilla/anonymous corporate music like that, but as presently constituted i can't see you being an actual "artist" as much as being a "producer" and in honor of your directing me to other music on "[your] bandcamp page. it's less dancy" , once again (once again, not to be confused with boundary-busting theoretical theoriest avant garde wunderkind les dancy)
  3. theory: if you want a new proper 100% original material formally-richardjames/aphextwin album you have to do one of two things: 1) completely blow him out of the water and make something that would challenge his ego. this would be akin to beating kobe bryant in the NBA finals: you know that next year he's going to come back and win the whole damn thing. 2) find out where he banks and completely neutralize his account. i've gotten the idea that he's done pretty well for himself financially and i believe he has a family now in his late 30s. if rephlex is paying the bills and he's comfortable financially, it's not like he necessarily owes us new material. if he wants to release old/er tracks a la analord or even slag off and release c-sides outtakes and aborted versions of tracks (the "new" christmas analords) he's technically earned the right to do that. however, i'm convinced that if he needed to make a big grab at cash he knows he could always shackle up in the bedroom and crank something out. while i think that much of his "legend" of being a guy who makes a ton of tracks every day mainly for himself and his friends and then has to be poked and prodded the nudged and bugged to release some as albums is exactly that (legend), when you're as talented as richard james is i'm fairly certain that you possess the unique ability to sit down and crank out great music whenever you feel so inclined.
  4. woops malfunction! i meant to add under the timothy dalton 007 part that the track seems to have been put up circa may of 09, and timothy dalton ended up being lord president rassilon in the last doctor who special, which wreeks of time lord treachery :) jimmy cauty of the KLF made top of the pops under the moniker "the timelords" with the song "doctorin the tardis" so maybe he's got some friends on the new show and knew that timothy dalton was going to be a prominent timelord and thusly attributed this track to him.
  5. exactly. somewhere in tussville clan tregaskin is smiling. their "lesson" for the idm world has been learned. there's actually a pretty decently sized "collective" of brits doing music anonymously: http://www.myspace.com/digitalvomitcollective - i'm 95% sure that the track "rich uncle skeleton" is aphex twin, however a perfunctory glance around http://www.digitalvomit.com reveals that the aforementioned track is from an acid compilation EP that took all of the tracks and assigned them to other artist names on the project. actually, http://www.myspace.com/richuncleskeleton doesn't sound like aphex twin, but the "star prototype RUS mashup" is ace and worth a proper nicking via totalrecorder http://www.myspace.com/timothydalton007 - i believe the greek 7" mix to be the work of jimmy cauty of the KLF. there were odd circumstances of which i came across this page and they point to the KLF. incidentally, you can download the greek 7" mix at http://www.bubblegunner.com (go to downloads then timothy dalton 007) and that is my #1 song for 2009 http://www.myspace.com/biginalbania - i think she wolves of london is by shitmat or soundmurderer or someone. i think shitmat is tied in with the collective. although the track "shitty dance music will tear us apart" is the #1 on that player. if you dig around some "big in albania" played a couple of shows, but from what i gathered they have anonymous patsies playing music that someone else made. for an added bonus, on that digital vomit collective myspace page take a look at their avatar and tell me if that looks like anyone you might know :)
  6. even though i knew thehauntingsoul would be mad at me for bringing up this topic (in under 20 minutes on this sub-forum i noticed that he was the big autechre guy on campus) i didn't ask this question mockingly or meaning to condemn the fakes themselves. moreover, i think it speaks to the very nature of what autechre's music has been in that, example, people aren't grabbing a 303 emulator and putting out united acid emirates fakes a few weeks ago. perhaps it's because ceephax has a "signature sound" whereas autechre strives to constantly destroy any and all sounds and/or notions of the standard structure of music in making... whatever you want to call their music. awhile back i conjectured that autechre reminds me of some old pink floyd stuff, the way 10+ different little/ish sounds would evolve throughout the course of a song. with them, though, i think they truly need a "hook" in a danceable-track-vibe in order to fully maximize their potential. when you listen to music and your head is hooked to nodding to a beat, it's kind of like the small world ride at disneyland/disneyworld. once you're on those tracks, you can look all around the different rooms and spot out the attention to detail all over the place because you're thoughlessly anchored to those tracks. now if you were swimming through those small world rooms, well, you have to focus a good deal of energy on staying afloat yourself and then short of repeated visits through the ride/tracks it's going to be hard to notice all of those technical details that are awry all over the place. now that quote i took from you, awepittance, that *IS* quite the condemnation of autechre and an epic win which begets great justice for you :)
  7. Why do you even post? why do any of us communicate with other human beings when the undeniable truth lurks inside of us? vanity? the perpetual quest for knowledge? the lulz? autechre nowadays is like seeing an old ex-girlfriend that you really loved go off the deep end and date a lineage of losers. you keep your heart and your mind open and keep hoping that she'll eventually do alright, hell, maybe one day she'll shock the shit out of you and you'll ask her out again. i'm not an autechre hater by any means. believe you me, i wanna hit that bitch one more time and feel the love of the early years. autechre was brilliant when they deconstructed dance music and hiphop and essentially mechanized the whole process of making those styles of music. now i believe they're deconstructing themselves and it's sad to hear how the one-mighty have fallen.
  8. i never liked rage against the machine. something about hearing "anti-establishment" songs on top-40 radio stations and being able to buy their cd at wal-mart never sat well with me. that said, i found their song "renegades of funk" to be especially insulting. it's like zach de la rocha decided that we're ignorant about funk music and decided to teach us a lesson from the top40osphere.
  9. i always knew it to rhyme with broke, as in moak-uhhhh
  10. as i said before, albeit approximately 90% in jest, touchscreen "pads" will be useful for police and the kind of people who need laptop-type internet/network functionality but not a whole proper laptop. i figure that apple is sandbagging on the features now for the inevitable upgrade (see iphone 3g to the original iphone) i predicted in the future that dummy terminals will rise again and we'll eventually have some sort of universal standard personal flashdrives, whether or not they're going to be tied in with the inevitable microchipping remains to be seen. i mean, the airport security industry spent billions setting up these full body scanners and only needed an excuse to get them fully unleashed (underwear bomber), some jails already have them. i bet they'll have mobile units for sporting events and maybe even deployable ones for festivals/newyears/checkpoints. the next step after full-body-scans/digital imaging will be the "security bracelets" that have mini-flashdrives on them and built in stunner capabilities, which is probably one of the last steps before outright microchipping. when they tie in monetary systems to unilateral flashdrives and microchipped IDing, these type of super-PDA touchscreens will be the key to dealing with people. i think it's fair to say that the standard of laptops in police cars will eventually be replaced by something akin to the ipad being on each individual officer, barring some sort of bottleneck on the input (i.e. if the digital keyboard is too slow) either way, i think the ipad represents a type of technology that will be ubiquitous in the future, it's just not going to be this actual generation of ipad.
  11. HAY, IS THERE ANY MORE ROOM IN YOUR SLEEPING BAG, GUYS?!
  12. that was a typo, sir. i would also like to point out that only mac users feel it their civic duty to get all kinds of anal and go "ahem" in pointing out grammatical errors as failed attempts at post-31337 colloquialism. oh and your avatar/signature combo screams out macos 7, dude. force quit to finder plz.
  13. i have this idea whereas this thread starts with an image posted, then the next poster comes in and says the first word or phrase that comes to mind, effectively captioning the picture. after doing that, they post a new picture for the next poster to come in and caption. undoubtedly, there will be some tangential links between pictures/captions and the next pictures given the way that the human mind works. i've got one hell of a picture to start you guys off, so have at it:
  14. the polysics are on tour in america right now. i think their myspace page for america is something like http://www.myspace.com/polysicsna - the chick who plays the keyboards and does the vocoder voice is about to retire in march after a festival at the budokan (mindphone) to focus on "being a woman and not a musician" so this is the last time to check them out with their proper lineup. these are a few proper music videos from the band that kick my ass http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBZKBFTCLLA http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9aL7tQhnwI http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9wSMuCJCkQ
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