Health issues for the old school fans

[marf]

14 hours ago, ooqpoo said:

kratom too

Ive been suffering from debilitating depression for 2 years. Nothing has worked. Even ECT.(shock therapy)  Ive been in and out of mental hospitals in that time. Month long stays. For suicidal ideation. It's been a nightmare. Long story here we come. Note:  I was stable for 12 years on Zoloft.

I have a cough. A constant dry unproductive cough. It just happened one day. I don't know what it's from. Ive had surgery for a hiatal hernia (Gerd). Didn't go away.  CT scans.  Pulmonologists.  Nothing.

So the depression started with the Allergy test. I couldn't take Benadryl for a 7 days to get the allergy test. So I turned to Robitussin Dm. I liked it.  I liked it too much. After swigging bottles of it for days, I asked reddit if I could just buy the dextromethorphan in pill form. Yes, you can get it at the dollar store. Well, I was tripping balls for days. To the point I had a manic episode. I thought I was a god. I thought I was going to be famous. I thought I was going to be gifted extended sight. To be able to see the Milky Way in all it's glory. I was running through the neighborhood like I had super powers. I felt incredible. I had incredibly creative Ideas. I could all if a sudden draw! Draw really well!!

Anyway, It came to an end with the police in front of my sister's house. I tried to throw rocks at the cops and dared them to shoot me. I said they wouldn't do it because I was white. This was at the height of the George Floyd protest. I was tackled and sent away for 5 weeks to a psych hospital.  They changed my diagnosis to bipolar and yanked me cold turkey off the Zoloft 200mg for 12 years and put me on scary bipolar drugs and plunged me into a deep dark depression.  Not to mention all the side effects. Too much to get into. Im not bipolar. I had a drug induced manic episode. Those idiots ruined me. 

Tried to go back on Zoloft and it didn't work. 

Anyway, after 2 years of this shit, My sister gave me a Kratom drink for Christmas and the shit made me feel so happy in 30 minutes. It was like flicking a switch. Proves depression is chemical. At least mine is. Affirmations don't mean shit. 

But as usual it got out of hand. I was spending 100's of dollars on Kratom. (took my sciatica pain away too). I was forced by my mother to go to rehab. 

I ended up on Suboxone. And it has the same effect as Kratom at taking away the depression. At least about 60 to 70 percent. (knock soon wood). 

im trying other sari's but nothing is working yet.

[marf]

To be honest ever since Covid dropped I think the world has been cursed. It all started then, and I've felt a darkness about the world. I think my depression is tied to it somehow. As kooky as that may sound.

 

I forgot; I got the sciatica from jumping out of the hospital bed and landing on the floor while handcuffed during my manic episode. One day that totally fucked my life up

Edited May 13, 2022 by marf

[logakght]

@marfwish you the best.

 

Varicocele in left testicle at 27.

Edited May 13, 2022 by logakght

[cwmbrancity]

9 hours ago, marf said:

Ive been suffering from debilitating depression for 2 years. Nothing has worked. Even ECT.(shock therapy)  Ive been in and out of mental hospitals in that time. Month long stays. For suicidal ideation. It's been a nightmare. Long story here we come. Note:  I was stable for 12 years on Zoloft.

I have a cough. A constant dry unproductive cough. It just happened one day. I don't know what it's from. Ive had surgery for a hiatal hernia (Gerd). Didn't go away.  CT scans.  Pulmonologists.  Nothing.

So the depression started with the Allergy test. I couldn't take Benadryl for a 7 days to get the allergy test. So I turned to Robitussin Dm. I liked it.  I liked it too much. After swigging bottles of it for days, I asked reddit if I could just buy the dextromethorphan in pill form. Yes, you can get it at the dollar store. Well, I was tripping balls for days. To the point I had a manic episode. I thought I was a god. I thought I was going to be famous. I thought I was going to be gifted extended sight. To be able to see the Milky Way in all it's glory. I was running through the neighborhood like I had super powers. I felt incredible. I had incredibly creative Ideas. I could all if a sudden draw! Draw really well!!

Anyway, It came to an end with the police in front of my sister's house. I tried to throw rocks at the cops and dared them to shoot me. I said they wouldn't do it because I was white. This was at the height of the George Floyd protest. I was tackled and sent away for 5 weeks to a psych hospital.  They changed my diagnosis to bipolar and yanked me cold turkey off the Zoloft 200mg for 12 years and put me on scary bipolar drugs and plunged me into a deep dark depression.  Not to mention all the side effects. Too much to get into. Im not bipolar. I had a drug induced manic episode. Those idiots ruined me. 

Tried to go back on Zoloft and it didn't work. 

Anyway, after 2 years of this shit, My sister gave me a Kratom drink for Christmas and the shit made me feel so happy in 30 minutes. It was like flicking a switch. Proves depression is chemical. At least mine is. Affirmations don't mean shit. 

But as usual it got out of hand. I was spending 100's of dollars on Kratom. (took my sciatica pain away too). I was forced by my mother to go to rehab. 

I ended up on Suboxone. And it has the same effect as Kratom at taking away the depression. At least about 60 to 70 percent. (knock soon wood). 

im trying other sari's but nothing is working yet.

https://www.yalemedicine.org/news/ketamine-depression

[marf]

6 hours ago, cwmbrancity said:

https://www.yalemedicine.org/news/ketamine-depression

Oh I know. Ive been on Benzo for ten years, Benzos preclude Ketamine from working.I went to a detox centre to get off the klonopin in 14 days to try the ketamine. But the rapid detox just doesn't work for benzos. I tried Got close.

 I really wish I could try it

[ignatius]

10 minutes ago, marf said:

Oh I know. Ive been on Benzo for ten years, Benzos preclude Ketamine from working.I went to a detox centre to get off the klonopin in 14 days to try the ketamine. But the rapid detox just doesn't work for benzos. I tried Got close.

 I really wish I could try it

Takes a good 12-18 months to detox from benzos if you’ve been on them long term. You have to step down slowly.  It’s the only way. I’ve done it. It was challenging at times but totally doable. I broke them in half then in half then skipped days eventually normalizing the GABA. got to where I would take like half a .25 mg Xanax once a week. 
 

obviously consult your doctor first. 

Edited May 13, 2022 by ignatius

[YEK]

I was on klonopin too for years 

Then I found it's not for long term use

And that it's not effective long term but your body needs it.. 

Took me about two years to get off 

[marf]

Oh I know. Its a bitch getting off Benzos. Now they say it causes dementia. So I have to get off. After I tackle the depression. It will probably take a year at least. Sucks being so dependent on something

[ignatius]

23 minutes ago, marf said:

Oh I know. Its a bitch getting off Benzos. Now they say it causes dementia. So I have to get off. After I tackle the depression. It will probably take a year at least. Sucks being so dependent on something

it sucks but if the thing to do is get off them then it's worth it and you'll feel better eventually. exercise helped me a ton once i was read for that..  

[YEK]

I wonder how long you gotta take the stuff to get dementia...

[ignatius]

8 minutes ago, yekker said:

I wonder how long you gotta take the stuff to get dementia...

apparently michael jackson was taking a ridiculous amount of xanax every day. like 40mg or something. a 2mg bar will knock most people out for a day.  

i'd guess a person would have to take it a life time to get dementia and then it's probably partly dependent on a person's genetics or whatever.. other factors. 

we're probably all going to get dementia from microplastics or some kind of plaque in the brain or whatever. 

Edited May 14, 2022 by ignatius

[J3FF3R00]

On 5/12/2022 at 7:05 PM, marf said:

 

LIve had surgery for a hiatal hernia (Gerd). Didn't go away.  

 

 GERD massive in the house!

I forgot to mention that I have eosinophilic esophagitis aka “feline esophagus” which is scarring of the esophagus from years of acid reflux. My food will often get stuck and cork up my esophagus so that nothing can get past the blockage and I’ll have to wait it out until the sphincter relaxes and the food goes down. Often times, saliva will back up and I’ll spend a half hour drooling into the toilet or in a bush or something if I’m out at a restaurant or the like. 
I had an endoscopic procedure where they stretched it out twice (once was scheduled, the other was in the ER after a 2 hour blockage from steak). It just went back to how it’s been. 
The only way around it really is to avoid the foods that get stuck. I have a diet. It obnoxious. 

[marf]

Christ thats awful J3FF

[marf]

Im constantly Gas lighting myself with this dementia shit. Looking at comments online I don't remember making. Or videos I don't remember liking. Life is getting scary. Im always afraid. 

[ignatius]

On 5/13/2022 at 10:50 PM, marf said:

Im constantly Gas lighting myself with this dementia shit. Looking at comments online I don't remember making. Or videos I don't remember liking. Life is getting scary. Im always afraid. 

memory is a weird thing. sleep deprivation, depression or things that i do automatically as muscle memory like locking the front door or turning on the alarm etc.. i often forget i do them then have to do that thing where i double check. i've made it a habit to mentally be present when i'm doing certain things so i don't forget about them. taking my daily meds is one i have to focus on because it's so automatic how i take them.. immediately after dinner.. that sometimes i forget if i took them because i'm essentially day dreaming and my body and brain are going through this process and performing a task. so, i try to shake out of it and remember. i've had it happen where i suddenly go oh fuck.. did i take my meds.. and i try to retrace my steps and can't actually remember.. because it's the same way every day so i could be remembering yesterday. it's kind of hilarious in way. once or twice i've double dosed myself. so it goes. 

anyway.. it's not dementia. it's just how life is and how the brain works after this long period of isolation and very much routine day to day schedule. there's a lack of punctuation to mark the beginning and end of a days events. 

the other day i went for a bike ride and didn't remember turning on my bike lights but they were on. 

[ghsotword]

On 5/14/2022 at 6:50 AM, marf said:

Im constantly Gas lighting myself with this dementia shit. Looking at comments online I don't remember making. Or videos I don't remember liking. Life is getting scary. Im always afraid. 

I would guess that these memory problems aren't dementia yet. It's more likely that they are a short-term side effect of benzos that only happens when you have benzos in your system

[marf]

3 hours ago, ghsotword said:

I would guess that these memory problems aren't dementia yet. It's more likely that they are a short-term side effect of benzos that only happens when you have benzos in your system

Could be right

[marf]

The worst issue with being middle age is losing your family. One by one .  And Ageism. I woke up in tons of pain today, but it could be covid. My sister had it, But its always something these days. 

[Squee]

Is it a health problem to hate the youth?

[marf]

lol. It seems to happen to everyone

[baph]

On 5/16/2022 at 11:34 AM, Squee said:

Is it a health problem to hate the youth?

the yoots are a damn menace

[ignatius]

47 minutes ago, baph said:

the yoots are a damn menace

 

[lyst]

I've been dealing with escalating chronic pain for the past few years.  Started with something called Pericarditis, which is where the sac around your heart is inflamed or full of liquid and it constantly feels like you are having a heart attack and a panic attack.  This has never went away for about 8 years.  Yes, 8 years of constant heart attack feelings and anxiety.  The medication I took for this issue brought forth all new issues.  The main medication for Pericarditis is a dick-ton of NSAIDs (ibuprofen, aspirin, etc).  So i ended up completely destroying my entire GI tract a few months ago.  So now i'm in constant heart and constant intestine pain.  This got too much to bear with work and I wasn't able to completely fulfill my duties so i was pretty much forced to resign from my job.  My wife is annoyed and fed up with dealing with the instability of being with someone with chronic pain and what comes with it so it looks like my marriage may be ending - tomorrow I am moving into my father's house and leaving.  So lose job, lose wife, all with in a couple weeks.  The sad part is my father's house is like 120 years old, needs tons of work, and i think I will only get sicker moving in there (I bet 1,000 dollars there's black mold all over the place).  Not sure where to go from here.  /endrant

Edited July 1, 2022 by lyst

[luke viia]

Man... that is one hell of a card to be dealt. Truly hope you find relief and stability. 

[sheatheman]

2 hours ago, lyst said:

 (I bet 1,000 dollars there's black mold all over the place).  Not sure where to go from here.  /endrant

go buy a box fan, 4 air filters the same size as the box fan (probably 24” square?), and some duct tape. Remember to save the box the fan came in. 

Now, tape all 4 filters together with the duct tape like you are building a cube with no top or bottom. Make sure you use tape all the way along the seams so it is sturdy and sealed.

Set this form on the box the fan was packaged in and trace it. Cut this square out and tape it to the bottom of the cube. Tape all 4 sides and leave no gaps.

Finally, tape the box fan to the top of the cube. Plug it in. You now have a super powered home air scrubber that is more powerful and effective than any appliance you can by. It will change all the air in a room in a few minutes. I built one after I did a bunch of drywall work in my house, and man it makes your air clean.