Jump to content
IGNORED

crazy sex positions


J3FF3R00

Recommended Posts

I was at a holiday party a few weeks back and someone had given some porn as a gift. We were all reading the section where readers wrote in out loud because someone wanted to know about crazy sex positions.

Some of the shit was unbelievable.

 

- The Tony Danza = When you are fucking a girl and you shout "Who's the boss?". The girl says "You are the boss." Then you say "No. Tony Danza is the boss."

- The Whodini (Variation 2) = You are having sex, doggy style, in front of a window. Without letting your partner know, you secretly switch places with a friend. Then you go around and wave to your partner through the window... technically, this one is also known as "rape".

- The Abe Lincoln = You have a hidden bag of shaved pubes. Make sure you finish on your partner's chin. Then quickly toss a handful of shaved pubes on your partner's face. It sticks to their chin like a beard.

 

 

 

Post yours.

:sorcerer:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Gravity

- The Abe Lincoln = You have a hidden bag of shaved pubes. Make sure you finish on your partner's chin. Then quickly toss a handful of shaved pubes on your partner's face. It sticks to their chin like a beard.

 

I fucking lol'd. That's some manly shit right there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

None of those are really "positions" so much as "lewd sex acts you'd look up on Urban Dictionary for lols".

 

My favorite:

 

Texas Chili Dog - Take a runny, chunky diarrhea shit on a girl's chest and titty fuck her.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

- The Whodini (Variation 2) = You are having sex, doggy style, in front of a window. Without letting your partner know, you secretly switch places with a friend. Then you go around and wave to your partner through the window... technically, this one is also known as "rape".

 

omflol

 

i don't know any aside from the standards, but urbandictionary found me the Bloody Bollywood:

 

When a guy has sex with a girl on her period, and proceeds to put a red dot on her forehead using tip of his penis with her menstrual blood on it. The girl then appears to have a bindi on her forehead like that of an unmarried Hindu woman.

 

cute!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dutch Ruddering is to grab your schwanz and have someone grab your forearm and move it up and down. Not technically a sex position.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Coalbucket PI

Im sure people on the internet are just making these up most of the time but I heard about something called shit blistering where you inject little blisters of shit just under your skin and then pop them when you climax, it's an annoyingly persistent image in my head.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Im sure people on the internet are just making these up most of the time but I heard about something called shit blistering where you inject little blisters of shit just under your skin and then pop them when you climax, it's an annoyingly persistent image in my head.

looooooooooool

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Gravity

- The Expert Knob Twiddler = Have sex with a girl from behind while mashing her face all over some keyboards. Record it and release it on Rephlex for $60, limited to 100 copies.

 

 

Richard's next LP.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Beta Carradine: You tie a rope around your neck and masturbate while a partner sprays you with a supersoaker full of carrot juice.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Gravity

Beta Carradine: You tie a rope around your neck and masturbate while a partner sprays you with a supersoaker full of carrot juice.

 

Nice one.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The Romanian Pacifier - While nailing a pregnant girl in the third trimester, the fetus administers a blowjob.

The Romanian Rollercoaster - 69ing while rolling down a flight of stairs.

 

Crazy fucking Romanians.

 

The Raccoon - After fucking a girl, punch her in each eye, leaving her with two black eyes. Then knock over her trash on your way out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest JW Modestburns

 

 

The Raccoon - After fucking a girl, punch her in each eye, leaving her with two black eyes. Then knock over her trash on your way out.

 

classic.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.