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stupid first world problems you're dealing with


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I feel like I just moved in to this new apartment, but somehow it's already September 12.  I only got internet hooked up a couple days ago, so I'm a bit behind on my internetting.  I will now list of as many FWPs as concisely as I can.

1. The curtains that came with the place do nothing to block out the light, so I've been woken up by the sun every day at around 8am for the last week and a half, but still not getting to sleep before 2am.  That's a fair amount of sleep dep.  On the upside, I did buy blackout curtains last night.  Will put them up today.

2. downstairs neighbour is an asshole.  he complained about me bumping around on the first night I was here.  "bumping around" in this case consisted of me walking from my doorway to my bed at 2am.  Not sure how this can really be avoided.  He phoned the landlord with the same complaint a couple nights ago while i was lying in bed watching Sarah Silverman show at a very low volume, 1am.  When I told the landlord I'd turn the show off, he responded that it shouldn't be necessary, as the complaint was to do with "bumping around"... but I was literally lying in my bed, so... anyway, I've resolved to using a headphone extension cable when watching TV.

3. these FWPs aren't very concise, and I have lost interest in listing them off.  The end.

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23 hours ago, Alcofribas said:

this is a longer story than i feel like telling but basically i work at a restaurant and one time this young woman came in to eat by herself and subsequently came to the bar a few times where we were able to strike up a little mini friendship. there was a kind of cute thing where we both have FFA jackets (look it up, idiot) and a month ago before she moved to another state we exchanged pins on our jackets. so we've been in touch here and there via text, all very chill and nothing necessarily flirtatious or whatever. this weekend she came back into town for her bday and had dinner at my restaurant. ok first of all, she looked insanely beautiful. like a criminal level of hotness that should result in legal action. i got her a fancy pastry as a small bday gift which i gave to her at the end of the meal. which honestly was so nice of me. after work we went out with a few other work people and it was all super chill and normal and we sat together and sometimes would go into that little world where it's a bunch of people at a table but it felt like it was just the two of us sort of thing. she was staying with a friend so couldn't be out too late. and i guess honestly that's about it. but the FWP aspect of this is that i've compartmentalized this whole thing but last night it hit me kinda hard that i really like this person and it can never be for various reasons (she's really young and lives across the country). 

so yeah i'm a fucking incel so today i'll just go ahead and feel like shit and listen to sad loser music 

i need the watmm community on deck here. we need to figure this out. i need hackers to penetrate the mainframe so we can unpack all the variables. i want targeted missions. i need members from all the countries to be contacting their ambassadors and ministers to see what we can do here. we need to get packages sent via courier across town and then airmailed to important locations. i need access to the grid, the network, the web, autechre's "system/rig" must be made available to me. i need richard to stop jacking off in fields while watching chemtrails/cumtrails and instead he should be making new music for this situation. brian eno needs to immediately release Ambient 5: Music for a Fucking Idiot Loser and one of you needs to download it onto my hard drive. we need access to the President and to The Media/The Fake News. help me out here.

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i need the watmm community on deck here. we need to figure this out. i need hackers to penetrate the mainframe so we can unpack all the variables. i want targeted missions. i need members from all the countries to be contacting their ambassadors and ministers to see what we can do here. we need to get packages sent via courier across town and then airmailed to important locations. i need access to the grid, the network, the web, autechre's "system/rig" must be made available to me. i need richard to stop jacking off in fields while watching chemtrails/cumtrails and instead he should be making new music for this situation. brian eno needs to immediately release Ambient 5: Music for a Fucking Idiot Loser and one of you needs to download it onto my hard drive. we need access to the President and to The Media/The Fake News. help me out here.

Just go visit her.


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Send her a letter containing the URL of this thread and a drawing of your penis.

Edited by Silent Member
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32 minutes ago, Silent Member said:

Send her a letter containing the URL of this thread and a drawing of your penis.

but then she'll think he's a psycho. and then she'll think everyone that posts here is a psycho. wouldn't want the forum reputation getting cocked up like that. we have a certain level of dignity that must be maintained 'round these parts.

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8 minutes ago, zero said:

but then she'll think he's a psycho. and then she'll think everyone that posts here is a psycho. wouldn't want the forum reputation getting cocked up like that. we have a certain level of dignity that must be maintained 'round these parts.

imagine sending someone a watmm link and being like: here, i can't explain it better than this

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1 hour ago, toaoaoad said:

Are you a heel-walker/ heel-planter, ie. when you walk do you put all your weight down into your heel?  Many people do this without realizing it and as a result can make a surprising amount of noise just walking around, which can shake the floor etc and be especially troublesome to people downstairs. Just adjust the way you walk, putting your weight into the front part of your foot, which is much easier to control loudness etc. and becomes natural very quickly. I've had heel-walker neighbours and it's a nightmare, I could feel the whole floor shaking and all they were doing was just walking around.

my upstairs neighbor is a heel walker and just her walking about in a normal way sounds like she's fucking stomping around with combat boots 

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I didn't really realize there were people that walk on their heels until my current housemate moved in. I already knew she was a stomper before she moved in, but I didn't realize what the exact stomping mechanism was until she mentioned a classmate of hers that was disliked and one of the reasons for this was that he was a toewalker. It boggles the mind.

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We lived in a house growing up with people living above us, duplex I think is the right term for it. At one point there was a professional clown living there who would practice walking on stilts. CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK

Edited by yekker
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The worst case i had of this was when i was 18, moved out for the first time, was renting a basement from a middle-aged married couple who ended up going through a messy divorce the winter i lived there. they'd be having a screaming match about their intimate lives directly above me in the living room while i was trynto work on beats, pretty much every night. also the only washroom in the place was through the living room, so if i had to go i'd go up there, and they'd always be like ohh hey bud! how's it goin there mate? like i hadn't heard what they'd been up to for the last two hours

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When I first moved to London I was living beneath a large Irish catholic family consisting of mum, dad and nine siblings in a 3 bedroom flat.  All of the kids were into Irish dance.  Bloody river dance every night.  When they moved out I convinced the landlord to resurrect his old 'no Irish, no blacks no dogs' sign though we did cross out the 'no blacks, no dogs' bit.  Ended up with a couple of Saudi Arabian students.  Nice lads who kept themselves to themselves.  Very quiet right up until the night of the explosion.  A couple of weeks later the cat found a severed hand in the back hedge once we were allowed back into the flat.  Tried to hide it under the bed.  Turned out not to be related to the explosion though, the local adolescent gang had found a tortoise and removed its shell, and then just threw it into the hedge.        

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I didn't live there for a long but one time I had a room in a very old building on the top floor with wooden floor boards reaching from one room to another. I guess the walls between the rooms were added later? Anyway, not only could I hear every little movement my neighbors did in their rooms due to the squeaky floor boards but I could actually feel them moving around in their rooms, because the floor boards would bend in the adjacent rooms based on how weight load on the boards shifted. So if I was in my room standing on a floor board and my neighbor stepped on the same board in their room I would feel like I got lifted up a little bit, if that makes any sense.

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10 hours ago, toaoaoad said:

^Soz to laugh @yekkercause I'm sure it was awful. I've lived under plenty of noisy people, in one case it was the basement suite of a house and the owner was the heel walker so what can you do in that case? "My house my rules". I called her T Rex.  I've lived in top floor apartments for the last many years and will continue to do so for as long as I can. I can't go back to living that way. Even having someone next door who does it is maddening. But I'm a pretty intolerant person :trashbear:

every airbnb i've rented in the past few months was top floor for this very reason. neighbour noises trigger me, i get so angry i can't function anymore and have no choice but to ask them to stop. just the other day, i had a talk with the neighbour above who's a heel-walker (i'm still at the ex's). he was super chill about it. unlike the psychotic next-door neighbour who was listening to music at full volume for hours the other day and wouldn't turn it down despite our many attempts at establishing contact with her. my ex had to call the cops for her to stop. i should go live in the woods. 

Edited by brian trageskin
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Guy in my building plays blues guitar leads every single night, especially if I'm trying to nap.  It may even be that motherfucker that lives below me.  The audacity on someone like that complaining about someone else's noise.  Might also be the landlord, in which case I don't mind.  He's cool.  Actually referred to my friend below as "the asshole downstairs" when bringing up that first complaint. 

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