J3FF3R00 Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 14 minutes ago, cruising for burgers said: my first sentence about karma is just a figure of speech, I don't believe in karma, or do I? maybe there's something else out there but I guess karma is the best word to describe how I look at it... or bad luck? is there such a thing? I know most therapists will say there’s no such thing as bad luck but fuck me if I don’t have a lot of it. It’s apparent to my wife, my friends and basically anyone who knows me that if something bad can happen, it usually happens to me. I’m sure it isn’t helpful for me to say that but I don’t know what else to say about it. I’ve worked hard on being productive, kind and friendly my whole life and I’m eating shit constantly. It’s just my way I guess 🤷♂️ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 9 minutes ago, Wunderbar said: You should rally the mentally challenged and take over the place. but it's the mentally challenged (1500) against one, I don't stand a chance... 🤷 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 13 minutes ago, J3FF3R00 said: I know most therapists will say there’s no such thing as bad luck but fuck me if I don’t have a lot of it. It’s apparent to my wife, my friends and basically anyone who knows me that if something bad can happen, it usually happens to me. I’m sure it isn’t helpful for me to say that but I don’t know what else to say about it. I’ve worked hard on being productive, kind and friendly my whole life and I’m eating shit constantly. It’s just my way I guess 🤷♂️ still, it's comforting knowing that more people feel the same... (I'm sorry that something bad for you is something conforting for me (fucking brains 🧠, how do they work?)... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wunderbar Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 Just now, cruising for burgers said: but it's the mentally challenged (1500) against one, I don't stand a chance... 🤷 Try a guillotine. please dont quote me in your manifesto. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
user Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 2 hours ago, cruising for burgers said: I think I must have done something really wrong on my previous life or even on this one cause my karma keeps fucking me up... it's little things but if putting it all together it weights considerably... I keep having situations like, for example, a lot of people where I work don't comply to standard rules (hairstyle and grooming) and I mostly do but yesterday the captain saw me on the elevator and told me that I needed to trim my beard... and I immediately think, fuck, why me... it's not just me... one day I was looking at my phone on a place where we should not but nobody really cares so everybody uses it, but me, by chance, crossed ways with a security and she told me I cannot use the phone there... immediately I thought, what about the other 100 persons who also do it? I've learned the hard way not to get conflictuous on these situations so I'm always basically 'yes sir' 'yes ma'am'...but these are just 2 examples... I go trough stuff like this almost on a daily basis... I work with people who don't give a flying fuck about anything like completely clueless about these things but they never get in trouble... I get to the point where I can't even decide what to do because there's always pros and cons on my mind... this is nothing new I just decided to share it now because (as a non native English speaker) it's not easy for me to explain this stuff without something being lost in translation and also when I read what I wrote I sound like a dumb fuck... my first sentence about karma is just a figure of speech, I don't believe in karma, or do I? maybe there's something else out there but I guess karma is the best word to describe how I look at it... or bad luck? is there such a thing? Maybe people see you as approachable and unlikely to cause trouble so they feel they can confront you to either set an example or project some of their own personal bullshit onto you. Obviously this is their problem, but maybe try to look angry/pissed off or try to give an impression of being emotionally and mentally unstable. Try to channel any kind of weird energy or unpleasantness you have in you so people don't feel so comfortable around you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hello spiral Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 1 hour ago, user said: Maybe people see you as approachable and unlikely to cause trouble so they feel they can confront you to either set an example or project some of their own personal bullshit onto you. Obviously this is their problem, but maybe try to look angry/pissed off or try to give an impression of being emotionally and mentally unstable. Try to channel any kind of weird energy or unpleasantness you have in you so people don't feel so comfortable around you. can confirm my Illegal Energy aids me this way both at work and out in public Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luke viia Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 On 2/23/2023 at 8:17 PM, J3FF3R00 said: I’ve never done K and was always super curious about the experience but never really wanted to try it because the “k-hole” always sounded a bit scary to me. What is K like and how does it compare to other drugs if at all? to be honest it's really hard to describe and is unlike anything else I know of, but i recently tried to describe a few bits of my experiences to a friend via text and I wrote "I've sped along parabolic curves while the size of an atom, felt floating invisible orbs pass through my body (odd but not uncomfortable)... and repeatedly felt what I can only describe as divine love and compassion bloom in myself and fully convince me that it was the true nature of things..." (that last bit is not exclusive to K, fwiw). there was another time that i experienced traveling along a rising spiral made of individual consciousnesses, some burning far brighter than others. it's weird, man. anyway, all that said, i have no idea how people can take K while clubbing. any light whatsoever was extremely bothersome to me (my speaker disconnected once and a blue LED in the otherwise pitch black room prevented me from navigating to the desk so i eventually gave up and laid in silence lol), and as it can seriously dilate time if you let it, music with a perceivable steady beat also felt somehow intrusive. hence my reference to music for airports in the other post. chopin's nocturnes were also a fav. I would try to take notes afterwards sometimes, and there's one journal I still have that has notes like "color is separation" and "I am harmony" and "it wants to be heard" and "nothing, darkness, silence, says all that can be said" (a line of thought that years later I was happy to encounter in Novalis' "Hymns to the Night") one other thing I can mention is that the experience seemed to be heavily influenced by whatever I had mentally imbibed in the previous hours, so I'd usually try to spend my time with something that brought me joy like a favorite philosopher or math or some such thing. once i watched a bunch of crust punk videos before getting into it and was greeted by visions of needles and death. didn't make that mistake again. hope that helps 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 15 hours ago, cruising for burgers said: I’ve worked hard on being productive, kind and friendly my whole life and I’m eating shit constantly. It’s just my way I guess 🤷♂️ pro-activeness, I've quit that, I always get into shit... being it because I did something or because I didn't... kindness and friendship only come after somebody gives me a reason to think they're a good person... I'm not into that "benefit of the doubt" anymore... it's more like "benefit of the certainty"... you're always a twat until you prove me otherwise... 13 hours ago, user said: Maybe people see you as approachable and unlikely to cause trouble so they feel they can confront you... no, it's the other way around... it's more like, "my face", people in general don't like it, because I don't seem approachable and nice like you said... I get very anxious in these situations and I used to blow up and let steam out even with the smallest things... my "yes sir yes ma'am" is the way I found to avoid conflict because I know if I do I'm gonna burst into flames and lose my temper hence losing my reason in a discussion (this happened to me a lot in the past, I got fired from 3 or 4 jobs because of that)... and I regret it af cause now I'm in a company which is worse than the ones I've been before... that's why I said that I learned it the hard way... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 10 hours ago, luke viia said: have no idea how people can take K while clubbing yeah I've wondered about this... I bet it's not the same amount/concentration or whatever... I've never done it but one report from a friend of a friend the guy ate sand and got cucko forever....but I've heard things alike with lsd... 10 hours ago, luke viia said: one other thing I can mention is that the experience seemed to be heavily influenced by whatever I had mentally imbibed in the previous hours, so I'd usually try to spend my time with something that brought me joy like a favorite philosopher or math or some such thing. once i watched a bunch of crust punk videos before getting into it and was greeted by visions of needles and death. didn't make that mistake again. yeah I once watched zappa's baby snakes DVD before doing acid and I went to fucking hell... never again... I member you telling me that shit like that also happened to you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ignatius Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 only done K once and it was just a few bumps in a club during winter music conference in 1997 i think.. and was awesome.. it was kinda the additive to the night that made everything just right. but only a few bumps. no k-hole shit.. just like a cup of coffee at the right time or something. it was nice. that's the only time though. wouldn't mind a doctor administered session to life the veil of some depression or pain management type thing. i think that'd be interesting and helpful. the K sessions for therapy are happening in oregon. i know someone who did it and it helped her a lot apparently. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zero Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 1 hour ago, cruising for burgers said: you're always a twat until you prove me otherwise... that's negative shit bro, and it's coming from your mind. if you think of others right off the bat in a negative light, then it's no wonder you feel they are looking at you in some sort of negative manner. just fuckin clear your mind of all thoughts in any situation you encounter negative emotions/thoughts, and try and keep it clear for as long as possible. by clear I mean don't think anything at all. when thoughts enter, then shut them down right away. thoughts aren't reality. stay above that shit man. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 (edited) 2 hours ago, cruising for burgers said: "benefit of the certainty"... you're always a twat until you prove me otherwise... I say this because it sounds edgy and it's a bit tongue in cheek but in reality I can't actually behave like that... but to be honest I've been getting nothing but disappointment when I welcome new people into my life... it's missing a time-line on the things I've been saying... I wasn't always like that but lately, working 24/7 and sharing a cabin with new people during 7 months in a row you get to see the real side of people, and most of them end up being fake and disrespectful af... this isn't me projecting, this happens with time... the way I see it, I'm extremely respectful (I really do believe this, even if I think that deep down I'm not that good of a person/human being), so the respect net I set up for new friendships is probably too high... I'm 8 or 80 as we say in my country, there's the people who can't stand me but on the other side the friendships I grow end up being really strong... this does take time though... 1 hour ago, zero said: by clear I mean don't think anything at all. when thoughts enter, then shut them down right away. I wish, that's one of the basic steps of meditation and unfortunately I can't achieve it... what I'm writing probably sounds too scattered but that's one of the main problems of not being a native english speaker as I've said before... Edited February 25 by cruising for burgers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toaoaoad Posted February 25 Share Posted February 25 (edited) I mostly agree with @zero but would elaborate that it's usually too hard to actually stop a thought, and trying to push thoughts away can actually make them persist more, depending on your relationship to that thought. You could end up in more mental anguish because now you're fighting with your mind. Rather than trying to push thoughts away or stop them I've learned to just see them objectively, observe with detachment etc. without accepting the thought as truth/reality but rather as simply a thought. Yes, thoughts aren't reality, and we have more power to escape them than it often feels like we do, especially the really strong persistent nasty ones. For me it's been enough just to have the intention of a clear mind even if that's never 100% fully achievable. Maybe I can't make my persistent negative thoughts disappear but I can put some space between my actual self and the thoughts. Changing your intention that "it's more important for me to be peaceful than to be right" can go a long way. Negative thoughts will tell you they're right. And sometimes negative thoughts/views/opinions are correct. But if they are doing nothing but tainting your outlook and making you miserable, what good does it do to dwell on it? tldr "This thought may be true, but is it helpful right now?" - took that line from The Happiness Trap (Russ Harris) - pretty cool book that covers a lot of this stuff. Edited February 25 by toaoaoad 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 26 Share Posted February 26 (edited) let's have some fun instead... see these papers here on the floor? they're those silver papers that come inside cigarrete packets that you rip off... everyday there's a new one on the floor... first time I was kind of annoyed so I kicked one out of my way and it ended up close to his shoes... and I thought to myself, one of these days I'm gonna put one of those inside his shoes... guess what I find inside my shoe the next day? u know the answer...😂 we both agreed that the room is too hot all the time so we also agreed that we should keep the thermostat on minimum temp... this is how I do it: and this is how he does it: 🤔😂 see this gray towel here? it's his towel and it stinks so much that everytime I open or close the door the stink comes out of it and infests the entire room: 🤢 I've asked him if it would be a problem to keep this curtain closed at least until I woke up because my bed curtain doesn't close completely so at sunrise I always wake up because the room is too bright... he said it was OK so I close it when I go to bed... every morning I wake up because he opens it when he arrives late at night... most of the days I wake up before him... now, 🍒 on top of the 🎂 the guy fixes his bed every morning... look at this and tell me if it makes any sense, this is his bed: and this is mine, why would he care to do his bed every morning if he keeps shitting on the floor? now, you might ask, why don't I have a chat with him about these things? and I ask you, could you? the guy is mid-30s... how come you explain that this kind of things are wrong to an adult? I could complain to HR or to my supervisor but if it's me complaining it's me who gets to be moved to a new cabin and I don't want that because this cabin is way better than the ones I've had before, it's quite bigger and it has a porthole which makes a big fucking difference... about that thing I've said before, I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I mean, I even judged him on the positive side because one night he arrived in the cabin and insisted that I drank a beer with him for us to get to know each other... and on that night he said things like "we're friends" and stuff... and he even gave me the credentials to an hidden Wi-Fi network so that I have free and fast internet all the time... pretty cool right? that's what I thought... now I'm always thinking that I owe him something so that's another reason why I don't confront him about all the other shit... I'm actually starting to find all this pretty funny...😅 Edited February 26 by cruising for burgers 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ambermonk Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 If iPods & mp3 players are obsolete, I must not have gotten the memo. Just went to Best Buy to look for one but they had none. My Samsung Galaxy phone from 2016 isn't an option either because the headphone jack has been fucked for the last few years but otherwise still works fine. And my iPod from 2011 won't sync on my desktop. So my only hope of editing my library on it is to boot up my Lenovo laptop from 2014 that boots up slow as balls. I just hope it'll still sync with iTunes on it. And my HTC Desire phone (also from 2011) finally died for good, which was still handy as an mp3 player the last couple of years. Guess I'm just a stubborn dinosaur when it comes to mobile devices. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ignatius Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 (edited) 37 minutes ago, ambermonk said: If iPods & mp3 players are obsolete, I must not have gotten the memo. Just went to Best Buy to look for one but they had none. My Samsung Galaxy phone from 2016 isn't an option either because the headphone jack has been fucked for the last few years but otherwise still works fine. And my iPod from 2011 won't sync on my desktop. So my only hope of editing my library on it is to boot up my Lenovo laptop from 2014 that boots up slow as balls. I just hope it'll still sync with iTunes on it. And my HTC Desire phone (also from 2011) finally died for good, which was still handy as an mp3 player the last couple of years. Guess I'm just a stubborn dinosaur when it comes to mobile devices. iPod touch was discontinued a while ago. they made an announcement that they'd be gone once they got sold. no more made. can probably find various iPods on ebay. there's some upgraded things available.. better batteries and SD cards etc so they work better, last longer yada yada yada. apple music works w/my ipod touch (got one a while back when my classic died) and so far so good but i get frustrated w/it. had to reorganize my library after a HD died. had the library backed up. itunes/apple music had done some weird shit. splitting releases into different locations including a duplicate music folder. so dumb. fwp: got a cold 3 weeks after getting over a cold. called out sick for work tomorrow. couldn't do it via the timecard app thingie they use because it wouldn't let me complete the time off request because i haven't accrued enough hours to have the sick time benefits kick in. so i had to text my boss instead. i'm exhausted. Edited February 28 by ignatius 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YEK Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 I’ve been buying clothes online and after I give my email address to these companies I’m bombarded by their emails of up to two a day. If they’d stick to two emails a week it wouldn’t bother me but this is ridiculous and it’s an instant unsubscribe from me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 4 hours ago, YEK said: give my email address to these companies why would you do that grandpa? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YEK Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 46 minutes ago, cruising for burgers said: why would you do that grandpa? Usually when buying clothing email is required. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 5 hours ago, YEK said: Usually when buying clothing email is required. You have little boxes to tik grampa Yek... Get some new prescription for new glasses and start reading the small prints... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J3FF3R00 Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 (edited) @cruising for burgersI must have missed it but do you live on a boat or a submarine or something? If so, underwater watmm’ing gets my nom for most-idm 2023 Spoiler We haven’t had a most-idm-off in a while Edited February 28 by J3FF3R00 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruising for burgers Posted February 28 Share Posted February 28 38 minutes ago, J3FF3R00 said: @cruising for burgersI must have missed it but do you live on a boat or a submarine or something? If so, underwater watmm’ing gets my nom for most-idm 2023 Hide contents We haven’t had a most-idm-off in a while I work on a cruise, and I'm lucky to be on deck one so I live above water... no 1st prize for me unfortunately... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luke viia Posted March 2 Share Posted March 2 (edited) upstairs neighbors man wtf is even happening this dude must play call of duty for like 12 hours a day with the occasional break to somersault over sheet metal before botching a kickflip through the kitchen door to slam every cupboard Edited March 2 by luke viia 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J3FF3R00 Posted March 3 Share Posted March 3 My belly has gotten big. I knew I was gaining weight but I haven’t really been looking at myself in the mirror much from the neck down and Jeeeezus. Between my back issues, terrible diet, depression and being a dad, I just let myself go. I’m definitely at one of my chubbiest moments. Even if I didn’t have back issues, exercise doesn’t ever really trim me down. I have a diet that I know works for me where I can basically lose 10lbs a month by cutting out gluten, sugar, alcohol, most meat and dairy then eating a fuck-ton of fiber… but meh. I’m just not motivated to commit. It feels like I’m almost at some point of no return tho and I’m just too apathetic to steer away from the edge. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ignatius Posted March 3 Share Posted March 3 6 minutes ago, J3FF3R00 said: just too apathetic to steer away from the edge. the fat .. fat... edge. been there. was up around 230 twice. first time i lost it just by paying attention and riding bike a lot.. currently at 200.. and hovering.. need to get down to 185 or close and hold there until it's the normal. i've got back issues too and it's harder to manage that when i'm carrying extra weight. all the other life things squeezing time/energy from life take a toll. if i eat less and cut out snacks and pay attention where the calories are coming from and have like a 6 month plan or whatever.. then that's reasonable. i get impatient though. anyway.. i commiserate.. though i'm not a dad. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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