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simple tasks that you perform in the bottom first percentile

Fred McGriff

By Fred McGriff
in General Banter

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Fred McGriff Grand Master

Fred McGriff

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Also Math... GOD DAM MATH SHALL BE THE END OF ME!

 

This is a vent thread right?

 

i still carry my ones when i'm factoring someone's tip at a restaurant. i am shit at math. i have to invoke multiplication table songs that I learned in elementary school in order to crunch numbers in my head

 

also, eggs

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Guest disparaissant

Guest disparaissant

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+1

disparaissant with that shit.

 

My hand writing is chicken shit as well and my signature isn't comprehendable at all. I think my grades might actually be suffering from it cause my friend and I get the same answers but mine for some reason are always wrong...

 

This is why I wish we abandoned paper and pencile entirely and just use tablets/ OLED Screens/ Turn in papers via word document and email... And for the Trees of course.

yeah i wish i could type everything. i can type over 100 wpm on a good day so it sure would be nice if i could do it all the time.

 

Also Math... GOD DAM MATH SHALL BE THE END OF ME!

 

This is a vent thread right?

yeah also this i can barely add

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chenGOD Grand Master

chenGOD

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i use milk in my scrambled eggs. a small amount. like coalbucket mcgriff said, makes shit fluffy yo.

 

I've never used milk - it fucks with the consistency for me. A little grated cheese is nice though. I mean, it's not the end of the world, I guess just personal preference. But I like my eggs pure.

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Guest boo

Guest boo

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cracking eggs. i've worked as a cook/chef, doing breakfasts and of course other dishes involving many eggs, and still i can fuck it up and don't do the one hand thing (scared to try, edit: i should just try it wtf). i have seriously chosen the wrong profession. i only fuck it up when i think i'm going to.. sometimes shells are particularly brittle though. i reckon small, stubby, fat hands are better for cracking eggs though.

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kaini Grand Master

kaini

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i use milk in my scrambled eggs. a small amount. like coalbucket mcgriff said, makes shit fluffy yo.

 

I've never used milk - it fucks with the consistency for me. A little grated cheese is nice though. I mean, it's not the end of the world, I guess just personal preference. But I like my eggs pure.

 

the most important thing to me is the butter. i melt a decent chunk of REAL FUCKING BUTTER in the bottom of a pot, then add the milk, and then the whisked eggs. and then i whisk that shit constantly until it's glorious and fluffy and delicious. edit: salt and pepper are also essential.

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Zephyr_Nova Grand Master

Zephyr_Nova

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It seems to me most people are bad at cracking eggs, so I'm bad but probably in the same realm as the bottom 50% there. However when i was painting condos for a month I noticed I could suddenly crack eggs with ease. It was almost as if they'd crack themselves. Then I stopped painting and my cracking skills went back to negligible.

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data Grand Master

data

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whenever there's something i have to do, i always postpone it til the last minute. always, no matter what, even if it's something i want to do. also, im always late. if i say i'll be there in 10, i'll most likely be there in 30. i guess those are more like flaws though.

 

on the other hand, im amazing when it comes to eggs.

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jules Grand Master

jules

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wait what is wrong with putting a little milk in scrambled eggs?

 

i usually put cheese in my scrambled eggs but i make over easy eggs much more often. and i douse them in tobasco.

 

i like egg threads.

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soundwave Grand Master

soundwave

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I'm trying to perfect the clean crack which leaves very little if at all residue on the side of the frying pan which is a bugger to clean when some of it drips on the outside and gets all crusty.

 

 

saying that I dont really eat much egg anymore anywayz

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kaini Grand Master

kaini

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nothing worse than when you're making a fried egg, you crack that fucker, and a tiny little fragment of shell falls into the pan and the egg congeals over it. drives my ocd tendencies fucking crazy.

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Guest Adjective

Guest Adjective

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whenever there's something i have to do, i always postpone it til the last minute. always, no matter what, even if it's something i want to do. also, im always late. if i say i'll be there in 10, i'll most likely be there in 30. i guess those are more like flaws though.

 

on the other hand, im amazing when it comes to eggs.

i'm also always late. there's always something else i need to finish before i do this or go there. to ensure i i work on something i usually keep multiple projects open and accessible so that as one intimidates another invites.

an interesting thought on making procrastination work for you http://www.structuredprocrastination.com

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Guest disparaissant

Guest disparaissant

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I cannot carry a cup of coffee without spilling, what a klutz I am. Need to leave a good inch

this too! is coffee waterier than water because I CAN CARRY A GLASS OF WATER WITHOUT SPILLING IT ON MY SKIRT

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Guest Z_B_Z

Guest Z_B_Z

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i find that the normal pleasantries required for day to day interaction i fuck up constantly. the job that i work at provides lunch and if someone requires a tiny action from me like passing the salt, i'll continually fuck it up. ill spill it or seem overly enthusiastic in passing it jesus its horrible. probably mostly in my head but i can tell i comes off weird. ah well, im a weirdo, im coming to terms with it lol.

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chenGOD Grand Master

chenGOD

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I cannot carry a cup of coffee without spilling, what a klutz I am. Need to leave a good inch

this too! is coffee waterier than water because I CAN CARRY A GLASS OF WATER WITHOUT SPILLING IT ON MY SKIRT

 

No - coffee is stainier than water.

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Guest Deep Fried Everything

Guest Deep Fried Everything

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trying to open a beer bottle with anything other than a proper opener

 

i've accidentally destroyed pieces of table tops and the like, as well as several lighters, trying to be resourceful. usually i am and it works, but hey ho not for this relatively simple task..

 

edit: not TWIST OFF

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