Plum Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Three things. Firstly, my parent's have befriended a stray cat. Secondly, my mother is mysophobic. Thirdly, I'ma dick. So, every time you pet "Stumpy" (he/she only has half a tail), my mum is there loitering with a bottle of alcohol hand gel. I thought it would be interesting to see her reaction to me giving Stumpy a (human) mouth to (feline) nose kiss. She is now convinced that I am infected with Bubonic plague and that it's only a matter of time before we are coughing up our kidneys and ting. Happy Mother's Day! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 Weird thing is, I am starting to feel ill. Mind games. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
awesomeperson Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Cat bite infection. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KY Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 not only is this whole thread hilarious, but "I kissed a stray cat because i'm obnoxious" is the best thread title in recent memory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobDobalina Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 Pushin parent's buttons, str8 Plummin'! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 Similarly, Christmas eve I ate some rather dubious king prawns to prove a point about use by dates. I was quite sick that night. Mind games. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaini Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toxoplasmosis Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest W32MyDoom Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 I kissed a stray cat, and I liked it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toxoplasmosis Oh fuck. Edit: tell me that i'll be alright Kaini. Tell me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobDobalina Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 That's how Tommy died in Trainspotting BTW. Might as well take up heroin while you still have the time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 This thread aint funny any more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KY Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 it might have given you conjunctavitis is gunky shit starting to build up in your eyes? or worms, maybe worms (out your ass, not your eyes) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted February 29, 2012 Author Share Posted February 29, 2012 Did Tommy kiss the cat that killed him? I need to know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaini Posted February 29, 2012 Share Posted February 29, 2012 nah, he just did loads of smack and rolled around in a fragrant mixture of his own filth and the cat's. i'm sure you'll be grand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted March 1, 2012 Author Share Posted March 1, 2012 I wonder if Stumpy is regretting our kiss as much as I am. He/she is probably posting about it on a forum right now... Oh wait no he/she isn't because he/she is a stray and doesn't have Internets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hugh Mughnus Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 I saw a hooker once. That's kind of like a stray pussy? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest iep Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 So, every time you pet "Stumpy" (he/she only has half a tail) lol, you said you'd pet your Semi (or your Stumpy, whatever) my mum is there loitering with a bottle of alcohol she's sick and she's going to stay sick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chassis Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 My fish died today. He had gunk in his gills. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaini Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 did he glug, then gallantly give up the ghost? RIP fish. it's kinda hard to feel bad about a fish dying, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chassis Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Well theres two other lads in bowl so I reckon theyre more broken up about it. At least the probably were, dunno if they remember there was a 3rd one now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 http://en.wikipedia....i/Toxoplasmosis Oh fuck. Edit: tell me that i'll be alright Kaini. Tell me! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Louis_Wain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaini Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 Well theres two other lads in bowl so I reckon theyre more broken up about it. At least the probably were, dunno if they remember there was a 3rd one now. someone explain to me why i find this post fucking hilarious. i have this mental image of the other lads swimming round in circles thinking 'aw, bollocks. john died. this sucks.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest iep Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 the story about the fish is terrible :( did he glug, then gallantly give up the ghost? *cough hack cough* i've always... i've always wanted to say *hack* i loved you *horrible cough, with blood* the fish is probably as "gutted" as i am, if you know what's good for you.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
perunamuusi Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 haven't read any previous posts (that's simply how i roll) but i regularly lick my cat's forehead to et him know that i'm there to groom him (cause that's how we roll) et = let Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest iep Posted March 1, 2012 Share Posted March 1, 2012 say, exactly how thoroughly would (or do) you groom him? i just spent a few moments observing my cat cleansing her bum with tongue Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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