For context, originally from the thread here:
My father-in-law, for the last five days, has been doing his own version of an advent calendar. Except, instead of pieces of semi-digestible chocolate, imagine that you get text messages. Now, imagine those text messages are full of judeo-christian* self-righteousness, and this sort of smug self-satisfaction with the prose. Like, you can feel how much he took a look at what he's written and is going "gosh, I really am gonna bowl them over with how clever I am!" (which means, of course, that it smacks of artifice - also, I know what this looks like because I do it too. Not saying I'm exempt).
What makes this particularly funny to me is that he's sending these LONG ASS stories/deep thoughts via text message. So he must be spending like 15 minutes or whatever just typing them out. Or, maybe, he types them our in Word and then copies and pastes into his phone? Anyway, best part was the other day he sent a text and THEN LIKED HIS OWN TEXT. You can't make this shit up.
Anyway, I vacillate every day between being filled with dread when I feel my phone buzz and know another text is coming, and a giddy anticipation at reading these things. Also whether or not to post them to WATMM for your amusement/derision.
*Disclaimer: given that his daughter does not identify as a Christian any more, and he was a pretty shitty dad who made holidays particularly shite, the irony of him trying push the "Christmas Spirit" makes it all the more excruciating
FOR YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE. WILL ADD TO THIS THREAD AS NEW TEXTS APPEAR.
"This morning a pretty little bluebird came and landed on the bird feeder out in back. When he got there he noticed that there was no seed in the feeder. He hopped from one side to the other making a careful check, to no avail. Then just when I thought he was going to fly away disappointed that there was nothing there for him he picked his little head up and started chirping and singing this beautiful song. He went on like this for what seemed like two or three minutes. You'd have thought he was the happiest little bluebird in the"
Edited by T3551ER, 06 December 2018 - 03:40 PM.