Tricone RC Posted September 20, 2019 Share Posted September 20, 2019 When I was 16 some friends of mine tried to set me up with this lass, on the promise that "she's well fit mate ennit, and she was well into this pic of you I have" (this was basically the equivalent of online dating in the early 2000s welsh marches). She was also 16, from one of the local children's homes, which were basically rural dumping grounds for urban kids who'd been taken from their parents. I had a few friends who were in "the system" already, most of whom were nice but often very rough round the edges from the abuse they were given before they were taken by social services, as you can imagine... Anyway we texted a few times, seemed nice enough, then one evening she tells me she can get dropped off in town to meet for the first time. I catch up with her, with a friend of mine in tow, down by the river (popular drinking/dogging spot for feral teens) to find her sitting on a bench alone in the dark, flicking fag ends into the river, absolutely wrecked and sporting a school bag intricately packed with green WKD bottles, padded out with newspaper so that they didn't jingle. So she was actually quite fit, and through her booze haze could tell she was a nice person, big heart n' all that, but obviously her being utterly sloshed made the whole thing, er, a bit odd. We all hang out, I neck a couple of her shitty drinks too, shoot the shit about acquaintances in common etc etc, but she was always dropping hints about how she hates her carehome and all the restrictions they put on you when you live in one, and hates the guts of everyone who works there. This wasn't surprising since most of the kids in them can't stand the places. Cut to about half an hour ahead, the three of us are strolling round on the riverbank, and we see the reflected blue flash of a police light on the trees and ground. Turn around to see a rozzer van crawling up the nearby road. An unnerving sight for any feral teen, but it had a more powerful affect on my date - with an "ah shite" she belts it, leaving her bag behind, shouting some mix of "fuckin' ell" and "i'll text you later" as she disappears into the woods. Officer gets out, ushers us over, asks what we're up to, who bought us our booze but what they really want to know is who we were just with. I'm put in the back of the rozzer van - door left open - while two cops talk to my mate. After a few minutes it's my turn, they ask me out of the van and I'm asked "did you know that [she] had run away from her caregivers?" and "did you help her to plan to run away?". To their credit they quickly realise that we're just dumbass teens and not co-conspirators. They leave us there, not before confiscating the booze, and drive off. We sit on a bench for a while, wondering if my date will ever turn up again, and what I'd do or say if she did come back - but she doesn't, nor does she text back, so we head to another friend's house for a bit before calling it a night. She gets back in touch with me about a week later. Rozzers tracked her down, took her back to her home where her phone was taken from her for a few days, and she wasn't allowed out except under supervision for a good while. Never really spoke after that, but ended up bumping into her a few times, when we were both visiting people at the carehome nearest me. She's nice, friendly, but definitely a nutter and claims to be able to see butterflies all the time (drugs). And, a couple of years later she suddenly turns up at my doorstep asking if we could hang out, having tracked me down through an old mutual friend and walked probably seven miles to the farm I was living on. Freaked the shit out of my parents. I drove her back to town, I awkwardly put up with her genuinely friendly but clearly deranged chat for a while, then she got on a bus and that's the last I ever saw or heard from her There's probably a moral to that story somewhere Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr_Nova Posted September 20, 2019 Author Share Posted September 20, 2019 She's prob been lurking on watmm for years, just waiting for the right time to shoot you a PM. That post was her cue. Get ready. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyrex Posted September 20, 2019 Share Posted September 20, 2019 4 hours ago, zkom said: Speaking about rabbits.. One girl I went out on a date with had rabbit skins drying in her balcony. And this was not somewhere in the countryside but in the city centre. Her neighbours weren't really happy about that.. Was her name Lucy van Pelt? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zkom Posted September 20, 2019 Share Posted September 20, 2019 6 minutes ago, Joyrex said: Was her name Lucy van Pelt? Hehe, no. I actually can't recall her name now. Anyway, I liked her but she was always very sporadic when replying to my messages etc, like answering a week later, so I finally gave up. Then a couple of months later she asked me how I'm doing but I had already started seriously dating someone else and told her so, which she took well enough and haven't heard about her since then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Somanymachines Posted September 21, 2019 Share Posted September 21, 2019 Haha reading that reminds of '50 Shades of Chav'! But I think you dodged a bullet there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr_Nova Posted September 21, 2019 Author Share Posted September 21, 2019 oh god oh god I'm meaning girl #2 on Monday, and meeting girl #1 for date #2 tomorrow. Eeeeeeeeee. What a weird lifestyle. I have a feeling girl #1's going to work out though, so I may not have a whole lot to contribute here after all. Still looking forward to living vicariously through whatever other tales of terror arise in this thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auxien Posted September 22, 2019 Share Posted September 22, 2019 now you're just bragging gtfo of here :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr_Nova Posted September 22, 2019 Author Share Posted September 22, 2019 Yeah I don't think I'm doing it right. Online dates are supposed to be like auditions, so you get like 10 different people all lined up and then see which one is most worthy. But I just meet one girl who seems pretty cool and I'm like "well, this seems like it'll probably work." Her writeup was the most well written though, imo. So it's not 100% based on chronology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr_Nova Posted November 3, 2019 Author Share Posted November 3, 2019 Anyone got anything good yet? (in addition to the good stories already covered) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dingformung Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 One day I texted a woman on Tinder but she didn't answer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drillkicker Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 I think I might have talked to a girl once. Don't remember exactly, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr_Nova Posted November 3, 2019 Author Share Posted November 3, 2019 It's easy - you basically just do what you do here, but you use your mouth hole and point it at a woman (or man or non-binary). Then as soon as you mention teh Autechres she/he/they goes "show me the D." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr_Nova Posted November 3, 2019 Author Share Posted November 3, 2019 Also, if you include in your profile that you're looking for something "casual" she will get the NTS reference and is as good as yours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drillkicker Posted November 3, 2019 Share Posted November 3, 2019 What if I just slip the word "gonk" into the conversation ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephyr_Nova Posted November 3, 2019 Author Share Posted November 3, 2019 Well if you're not looking for something casual, you can always let her know you're ready to gonk steady. You never know, she could even be your gonk steady one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drillkicker Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 I'm more interested in a latentcall with a dummy casual, or maybe a wetgelis casual interval. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dingformung Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 Hope she will Drane your pendulu Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Salvatorin Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 all this is talk is so cichlisuite, think i'm gonna be ccec Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drillkicker Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 I guess we can all end Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candiru Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 One time I met a Chinese girl on Tindr who was cheating on her boyfriend. She is now married to him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Det Bluto Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 A Ggilf named Natalie and three packs of Camel Wides. Los Cruces, Nogales, semi rusted ‘86 Fiero. Red Bulls and pinata candy. Lo Mein and food allergies. Not even about Ggilfs but it was for a project. If I say the names Harrison Curts and Liz Renfro, Holden Tence and Lawrence Kres a third out there will instantly know what it’s about. Or more importantly, was. About. We never completed the project. Ashleigh made a mix tape of Italo Disco but that ended in epic fashion with the Pet Shop Boys song about paint. Long story short, we met for coffee and four years later we aren’t on speaking terms. It’s like a death. Fuck effort Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Det Bluto Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 We were together for four years, haven’t spoken in two. Correction: six years. Effectively dead to each other. What a weird gamble. Roll the dice. . If they land this way you pretend to live happily ever after. But when they land negatively, you gain an enemy. Someone to fear bumping into so you can pretend nothing happened including the dice roll. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Salvatorin Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 *snaps fingers* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chessy Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 I joined a dating site after much cajoling off my family.Rejected some very odd would be suitors for reasons I'd rather not go into in a first post.Eventually I spoke to a nice bloke. Well he seemed okay until I met him outside a local pub.His trousers had a suspect shiny patch at the , uh , frontal area and after he bought himself a pint he asked if all my hair was real . When I assured him it was he said that I couldn't come back to his flat with him as my hair would block up his sink...I made my excuses and left. I saw him later,buying a tray of chips which he then poured into a blue plastic bag which he had produced from his pocket. Oh and his first name was Cliffort. Yes...with a T. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oscillik Posted November 4, 2019 Share Posted November 4, 2019 lol Cliffort the dog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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