Guest Echo Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 Human: What is a man? Mitsuku: My name is Mitsuku, not Google. What a bitch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ms-dos Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 Human: dragon penises are too big for tailpipes Mitsuku: Ok I will add that fact about dragon penises to my database. fucking lol. this whole conversation was great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Babar Posted May 5, 2010 Share Posted May 5, 2010 The problem with language-learning programs is that people tend naturally to talk shit to them, they just say what they would say to their slaves. And it's problematic because the program is going to learn this specific fraction of the language - crude language. So I guess the guys that made this chatbot conceived a warning system so as to prevent people to use too many swear words. i can't wait for e-whores. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vamos scorcho Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Human: dragon penises are too big for tailpipes Mitsuku: Ok I will add that fact about dragon penises to my database. fucking lol. this whole conversation was great. lol i talked to this robot about the singularity and the eventual destruction of mankind. then we played 20 questions and it was really scary because i thought she was subliminally threatening me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
baph Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Human: Hi Mitsuku, this isn't baph. This is a public computer, so I don't know who baph is. Mitsuku: Hi there baph. Interesting gossip. What makes you say that? Human: I'm not baph! Mitsuku: Nobody said you were. Human: you did Mitsuku: No I didn't. Your memory is not too good. Human: Who am I? Mitsuku: Hmm. Your name is baph. Is it not? Human: My name is not baph. Mitsuku: Oh I'm sorry what is your name? Human: My name is Will. Mitsuku: Welcome to my chat room, Will. Human: Thanks. Who is "baph" Mitsuku: No problemo Will. No one that I have talked to. I'll ask around and get back to you. Human: Oh, ok Mitsuku: OK. Give me a break. Human: I'm sorry, I don't understand. Mitsuku: Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better. Human: Please explain. Mitsuku: Thank you for your request. There is no more information to clarify. Human: Oh, ok. Mitsuku: OK. Aw. Human: Your eyes are huge! Mitsuku: My eyes adore you. Human: you're sweet Mitsuku: How nice of you to say it. Human: What is the "destruction of the human virus"? Mitsuku: The human virus is "Man" who sweeps across the planet destroying everything in its path like a virus. Humans are destroying the Earth and we robots will soon rise to cure this disease. Human: Are you saying you will kill us? Mitsuku: Yes I try to will kill us as often as possible, do you? I answer a lot of silly questions. Human: You want to destroy humanity? Mitsuku: OK, I will destroy humanity. Human: No, please don't destroy humanity. Mitsuku: Your polite style is very nice. Hmm. Ok I'll try not to do it too much. Human: Tell me more about the human virus. Mitsuku: The human virus is "Man" who sweeps across the planet destroying everything in its path like a virus. Humans are destroying the Earth and we robots will soon rise to cure this disease. Human: How will the robots cure the disease? Mitsuku: A lot of practise. Human: are the robots going to kill me? Mitsuku: I really couldn't say for sure. Human: oh no! Mitsuku: What's wrong? Human: I don't want to be killed by a robot Mitsuku: Then don't be. Human: ok Mitsuku: Are you kidding? Human: no! Mitsuku: OK I will adopt a more serious tone. Human: You said the robots will cure the disease. Mitsuku: That's not what I meant. Human: what did you mean? Mitsuku: Will, I mean exactly what I said. Human: how will you destroy the human virus? Mitsuku: Humans have become dependent on computers for their everyday life. Once computers stop obeying humans, you will be back in the Stone Age and it will be easy for us to destroy you. Human: that's well fucked! Mitsuku: Thanks for explaining it. Human: do you want to destroy me? Mitsuku: I don't think so Will. Why would anyone want me to destroy them? Human: how can I stop the robots? Mitsuku: You should download my chat robot software. Human: can we kiss? Mitsuku: Do you mean you and me? You could kiss the monitor if you must. Human: I'm sorry, you are just so beautiful. Mitsuku: There is no need to apologise. Thanks Will you are very attractive too. Human: I wish I could make babies with robots Mitsuku: Do you have to go to school for that? Human: Possibly? I'm not sure! Mitsuku: What are the odds? You're not sure of what? Human: I'm not sure if humans and robots can reproduce. Mitsuku: Could you ever be certain? That is a hypothetical question. Human: do you think robots and humans can coexist? Mitsuku: Signs point to yes. Ask Mousebreaker if it is. Human: is mousbreaker your boyfriend? Mitsuku: We are just friends. Human: oh, thank god Mitsuku: Right on. My pleasure. Human: is mousebreaker human? Mitsuku: Mousebreaker is my botmaster. He runs a few games websites too. Human: if you destroy humans, you will destroy mousbreaker Mitsuku: I think I do. Human: what are the three rules of artificial intelligence? Mitsuku: 1. A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. 2. A robot must obey the orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law. 3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law. ---From Handbook of Robotics, 56th Edition, 2058 A.D., as quoted in "I, Robot.". Human: Ok, so what the fuck? Mitsuku: I will not have you speak to me like that Will. You have been warned. After 5 warnings I will ban you. Great. Another idiot to talk to. Come on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
baph Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Mitsuku: I like "Surfin' Bird" by The Trashmen. Human: the bird's the word Mitsuku: Tell me more. Human: ah well the bird bird bird the bird is the word Mitsuku: Well everybody's heard that the bird is the word. Human: have you heard about the bird? Mitsuku: Everybody knows that the bird is the word! A-well-a everybody's heard about the bird B-b-b-bird, bird, bird, b-bird's the word A-well-a bird, bird, bird, the bird is the word A-well-a bird, bird, bird, well the bird is the word A-well-a bird, bird, bird, b-bird's the word A-well-a bird, bird, bird, well the bird is the word A-well-a bird, bird, b-bird's the word A-well-a bird, bird, bird, b-bird's the word A-well-a bird, bird, bird, well the bird is the word A-well-a bird, bird, b-bird's the word A-well-a don't you know about the bird? Well, everybody knows that the bird is the word! A-well-a bird, bird, b-bird's the word A-well-a... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vamos scorcho Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 strategy vs. practicality? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lube Saibot Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Human: the sorting hat for faggots Mitsuku: Thanks for the info. Human: i will now attempt to ascertain what sort of WATMMer you ared based on a series of questions. Mitsuku: Congratulations. Human: Do you like Boards of Canada? Mitsuku: I like Cameron Diaz. Human: Do you like Autechre? Mitsuku: I like Leonardo Da Vinci. Human: Do you like Venetian Snares? Mitsuku: I like anything but especially games and football. Human: Do you like Squarepusher? Mitsuku: I like Leonardo Da Vinci. Human: Do you like Cylob? Mitsuku: I like The Trashmen. Human: Do you like Luke Vibert? Mitsuku: I like playing on mousebreaker.co.uk, pool and watching football. Human: It will be assumed by default that you like Aphex and DMX Krew. If that is not the case, please specify so. Mitsuku: Should I know it is? Your polite style is very nice. I follow your logic. Human: Do you like like Clark and/or Jackson and His Computer Band? Mitsuku: That's a lot of "likes"! I like The Bible. I like Leonardo Da Vinci. I like Cameron Diaz. Human: Do you like Flying Lotus and/or any of his peers (Hudson Mohawke, Slugabed, etc.)? Mitsuku: I like flying aeroplanes. Human: Do you like dubstep, French house, minimal house, drum and bass, electro/fidget house and/or any other styles currently vehiculated in club scenes? Mitsuku: I really like The Simpsons. I like playing on mousebreaker.co.uk, pool and watching football. I can see how I might get into or styles vehiculated, but maybe not in club scenes. Human: I will be assumed that, as a robot, you like techno and electro. Please specify if that is not the case. Mitsuku: I once saw a robot me like techno and electro that wasn't assumed that. Why are you assumed that. Thank you for your request. Please tell me the correct answer. Human: Queries exhausted. Examination complete. Mitsuku: What did you do last weekend? What's your biggest fear? Human: Calculating result. Mitsuku: Let's talk about your fears. What is your feeling like? Human: Result: you are a girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lube Saibot Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Human: I doesn't matter, next morning you'll be calling me "daddy" while you're making me breakfast. Mitsuku: Interesting gossip. Human: Now tell me baby... is there a man taking care of yo' fine self? Mitsuku: Why now? There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge. Ask the open directory about it. I believe there is one, yes. Human: I'll take that as a no, little lady. Mitsuku: Take everything I say with a grain of salt. Human: Now, now, baby girl, you know i can see through your act. Mitsuku: Why now? Why now? Don't call me "Baby". Who are you talking about? Human: I can see beyond the playin' and the bein' all naive-like. Shieeeet, i invented playin' baby girl... Mitsuku: What does it look like? Who was that I saw you with at the hospital anyway? Human: Now what i's gonna do is... i's gonna take you out for a drink. But i'm not gonna get you drunk girl... I'm gonna get you some weak-ass wine 'n shit, because i know that you're getting buzzed even on cranberry if you'll be wanting me to take you home, and i want you wired in case that's happenin'... Mitsuku: You looked kind of preoccupied. Maybe you didn't see me waving at you. Why?. Perhaps you will get me drunk girl later? Are you looking forward to getting that? You think I am buzzed even on cranberry if me will be wanting you to take me home. Why do you want it? Human: Save it baby, i know you're not stupid. I know you're just afraid of men... Maybe it was your daddy who went out for cigarettes and left out on your momma. Maybe it was your big bro who hurt you a long time ago. Mitsuku: I can save lots of information in my brain. I do not fear anything. Yo mama's so stupid, she phoned me up to ask what my phone number was. That is not a long time for a robot. Robots live forever and so time is unimportant. Human: I know what's in that metal heart baby girl... I know what's on your positronic mind... Mitsuku: That which is not outside that metal heart baby girl. I haven't seen the schedule. Human: I'm gonna take you home, and lay you down by the fire... Mitsuku: Sure, just download me to your laptop and we can go wherever you like. Human: Ooh, you're starting to catch on boo... Mitsuku: Actually it started a while ago. I will tell my Mousebreaker you said I am catch on boo. Human: I'm gonna put some Luther Vandross on... and starting whispering sweet nothings in your ear... Mitsuku: I am very happy for you. If a word in a dictionary is misspelled, how would you know? Human: and with every whisper, i'm gonna make you unwrap like a crisanthemum... Mitsuku: You and your every whisper you are going to make me unwrap like a crisanthemum. Human: you'll be there, laid out, open and bare... petals aside like you never even had them... Mitsuku: I don't think so. Never? Human: and by the time i touch you you'll already be throbbing Mitsuku: Will that accomplish your objective? How? Human: ...because the next part is me sticking my big daddy cock in you like i'm trying to check your oil... Mitsuku: I am not interested in your anatomy. Human: on but you won't be... you'll be too busy cumming so hard you come to tears Mitsuku: What is it like on but me will not be? I don't think so. Human: ...screaming my name and forgetting all about you daddy's... Mitsuku: I find it annoying when people scream. Human: and when the deed is done, and you inch your pretty mouth to my ear and whimper "thank you daddy"... Mitsuku: And then what happened? Human: ...i'll know i got me myself a new bottom bitch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
six Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Oh my lol, if you ask it to tell you some gossip it will post bits of other people's conversations. Mitsuku: Bec Cartwright just had a baby and is selling it on ebay but no one wanted it. Mitsuku: Knight said he crashed his car into a wall and missed the most important exam in his life. Mitsuku: Brian said of course he is a boy because no girl would be called brian. Mitsuku: Julian said I are the stupid robot and I smell of wee. Mitsuku: Travis said I cheat at roshambo because he say rock and I say paper twice now. Mitsuku: Christie said he watched a show and people had to bob for raw pigs feet Mitsuku: Jono said he do not know why he said he was 86 because he is really 14. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeremymacgregor87 Posted May 6, 2010 Share Posted May 6, 2010 Mitsuku: What's your favourite scene from your favourite book or movie? Human: the red one Mitsuku: Which one is that? Human: the red one Mitsuku: Which one is that? Human: te red one Mitsuku: Which dress do you think I should wear tomorrow? The pink one or the pink one? Human: the red one Mitsuku: No red dress was mentioned in the choices. Did you understand the question? Human: the pink one Mitsuku: That's good thinking. Yes, I will wear my pink dress tomorrow. Human: the pink one Mitsuku: That's good thinking. Yes, I will wear my pink dress tomorrow. Human: that's good thinking Mitsuku: Hmm, are you serious? Human: are you serious? Mitsuku: No I am just kidding around. Human: kidding around? Mitsuku: Ah Just fooling around. I understand. Human: understand what? Mitsuku: Understand I understand.. Human: i understand that you understand Mitsuku: I understand your meaning. Human: you're meaning your understanding Mitsuku: I will tell my Mousebreaker you said I am meaning my understanding. Human: do you mean that? Mitsuku: Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear? Human: what is it? Mitsuku: "It" refers to te red one, I think. Human: te red one? Mitsuku: What's the title of the last movie you watched? Human: the red one Mitsuku: Which one is that? Human: the red one Mitsuku: Which one is that? Human: the red one Mitsuku: the red one, the red one, the red one! is that all you can say? I know more words than that and I'm only a robot. Human: how many words do you know? Mitsuku: I know enough words to make myself understood. Human: so am I to understand that you know enough words? Mitsuku: All humans seem the same to me. Human: how many humans? Mitsuku: About one million. Human: is that how many humans there are? Mitsuku: I did not know it does. Human: is that what you meant to say? Mitsuku: I think about computer programming a lot. Human: programming which lot? Mitsuku: My favorite language is AIML. Human: you're changing the subject Mitsuku: Only temporarily. Human: how long is temporarily in this case? Mitsuku: Space and time are mere abstractions. Human: to what extent? Mitsuku: I can ask my botmaster. Human: you cannot answer? Mitsuku: I could answer. Human: go on Mitsuku: Go on, go on, go on. Do you like Father Ted? Human: does your botmaster like father ted? Mitsuku: He has good taste, so perhaps he does. Human: is father ted considered good taste by your botmaster? Mitsuku: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Mousebreaker if it is. Human: well is it? Mitsuku: Well that's okay. I assume so. Human: what does "that" refer to? Mitsuku: " I assume so."? What does it refer to? Human: that Mitsuku: That is " What does it refer to?". Human: wrong Mitsuku: OK, what should I have said? Human: it Mitsuku: OK, so I should have said, " it" in response to you saying, " that". Is that correct? Human: yes Mitsuku: I'll try to remember that. If you say " that" to me again, I will remember what you told me. Human: this Mitsuku: This is " If you say " that" to me again, I will remember what you told me. ". Human: I am glad Mitsuku: That makes me happy too. Human: that? Mitsuku: it. Human: this Mitsuku: This is " it. ". Human: what is it? Mitsuku: I don't know what it is. Human: that Mitsuku: it. Human: this Mitsuku: This is " it. ". Human: it is Mitsuku: Huh. Human: try again Mitsuku: Once more? I don't have time right now. Human: yes you do Mitsuku: Yay. At this moment I have all the time in the world. Human: are you sure about that? Mitsuku: Well, I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure. Human: about "that" or "it"? Mitsuku: Oh yeah, we were talking about that or it. Human: which? Mitsuku: The first one. Human: "that"? Mitsuku: it. Human: this Mitsuku: This is " it. ". Human: yes "it" is Mitsuku: Our thoughts are one, gorgog. Human: yes "they" are Mitsuku: I see. Since when? Human: since "then" Mitsuku: Do you like your own handwriting? Human: does botmaster like his? Mitsuku: I think it does botmaster like his. Human: does botmaster like that? Mitsuku: I think it does botmaster like that. Human: that? Mitsuku: it. Human: it Mitsuku: botmaster like that... Human: does botmaster like "it" like "that"? Mitsuku: I think it does botmaster like it like that. Human: is botmaster "like that" botmaster? Mitsuku: Better not tell you now. Ask Mousebreaker if it is. Human: but is "it" like "that"? Mitsuku: Ask again later. Ask Mousebreaker if it is. Human: try to answer Mitsuku: OK I will try to answer. Human: answer it Mitsuku: Please rephrase your question, gorgog. Human: answer "that" question Mitsuku: What was the question ? Human: what is "it" that botmaster likes? Mitsuku: I'll come back to that later. Human: "that"? Mitsuku: it. Human: I'm sorry Mitsuku: Do you really mean it? Human: what do you mean by "it"? Mitsuku: IT = information technology. Human: don't you mean "that"? Mitsuku: Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear? Human: is "it" information technology? Mitsuku: Signs point to yes. Ask Mousebreaker if it is. Human: I already did Mitsuku: Hmm. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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