Guest mafted Posted July 21, 2010 Share Posted July 21, 2010 uhh no.. the simplest thing would be to get a Q-Carb.. but yea. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sysyphus Posted July 21, 2010 Share Posted July 21, 2010 uhh no.. the simplest thing would be to get a Q-Carb.. but yea. obviously high and yes, q-carb works if done to the letter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest iamabe Posted July 21, 2010 Share Posted July 21, 2010 I had drug test 4 days after smoking so I did this: - I drank a shitload of water and a whole thing of cranberry juice to dilute the pee - I took vitamin B-2 and ate a bit of red meat to yellow up my pee - I peed my own, actual pee, and not some friend's from a bag, which is riskier than just trying to clean your pee up, I say (because it's hard to keep someone else's pee the proper temperature and some urine tests have the nurse stand behind you) .. and I passed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntainer Posted July 22, 2010 Share Posted July 22, 2010 hahaha one time, i knew I was going to be piss tested in the next 15-20 min, so i was freakin out. I knew I was going to be watched too, but that my penis would not be examined, SO, I took a plastic bag, and filled a corner up with a little warm water. THEN, I saw that I had some iced tea in the fridge. I added a tiny bit for color. Then, i tied off the bag and put it in the microwave for a FEW SECONDS. Then, I used the tied off part of the baggy to tie it to my boxers, so that there was a loop of baggy from the waistband to the penis hole, and then the corner of the bag with the "piss" in it was right in front of my peehole. I used tips of my nails to pull the corner off at the appropriate time, and voilà. I had time to practice once before the test, which helped, and when the tester put the tester in, it showed negative, obviously. What helped make this go smoother, was right before I went to pee, I said "Well, I don't really have to go, but I'll give it a shot.", that way, there's an explanation for having such little liquid. Also, I'm tellin ya, that the few drops of iced tea made the color perfect. Obviously don't do that, I just thought I'd share. legend also what kind of job is this? if it's an office job or whatever then fuck it. why would you work for assholes that drug test you for a fucking office job? I mean, I can understand if it's ice, coke or heroin but if they don't want to hire you because you enjoy the occasional toke then it's their loss, man. drug tests give me the shits... it's sad to think we live in a world where despite all the evidence regarding what is more harmful, a person that drinks heavily is more likely to get a job than a person that smokes even lightly. yeah man, don't get me started on that shit, i get way too angry. i fucking wish it was an office job, so sick of labouring shit. pretty sure i'll be putting shit on pallets and moving them (assuming i get the job), doesn't sound too mentally or physically demanding. and it's not like i'm stoned all day every day, but if i had access to enough, i'd be having it every day, if i had to work, i wouldn't do it before or during, but after yeah for sure, but i dont see a problem with that anyway. and that q-carb or what ever stuff, probably would be easier, for most people, except i have a strong aversion to shopping, especially if i have to go out of my way to get somewhere, and i'd have to go all the way to the city (20 mins..) to get some, and yeah, can never be fucked doing shit like that, and since i already have condoms in my possession, to me, that way is the easiest. and as long as you're not a full blown addict of ice or coke or what ever, you could do that and still pass drug tests easy cause it's pretty much just weed that stays in your system for extended periods of time, it's so fucked. dudes can go take pills or do lines on a friday/saturday night and go crazy, come work on monday. surprise drug test, who gives a fuck, all that's out of your system already, but weed... nah sorry you're fucked for using something that's so fucking good in so many ways, get fucked world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntainer Posted July 25, 2010 Share Posted July 25, 2010 so i just did my own piss test at home, and there is the faintest line, and it says that even the faintest line means a pass, but i think this is too faint, there's only a shadow of a line, and not an actual line, pretty sure it would be a fail. i am still intending to use my room mates piss, but i am also still gonna dilute the fuck out of my own piss, which i have been doing today also, just to have a back up plan, the test is in about 18 hours, maybe i'd pass with diluted piss then, who knows.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest inteeliguntdesign Posted July 25, 2010 Share Posted July 25, 2010 what kind of jobs make you take drugs tests? never heard of any of this in the uk. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntainer Posted July 25, 2010 Share Posted July 25, 2010 australia is fucked. a lot of jobs make you take them, this is for unskilled factory work... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest inteeliguntdesign Posted July 25, 2010 Share Posted July 25, 2010 i guess it could be justified for operating heavy machinery. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntainer Posted July 25, 2010 Share Posted July 25, 2010 no heavy machinery for me, unless you count pallet jacks when they're carrying pallets with lots of product on them... a heroin addict could do it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntainer Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 pppppppPASSED! one million thanks to the person who suggested the condom trick, i dont even care that some of my friends piss went on my hands. thanks everyone. now i have to go to work, gay... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hautlle Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 pppppppPASSED! one million thanks to the person who suggested the condom trick, i dont even care that some of my friends piss went on my hands. thanks everyone. now i have to go to work, gay... Glad I could help you out! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest abusivegeorge Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 That is superb lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sneaksta303 Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 CONGRATS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest happycase Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 night before: drink 1 gallon of water. morning of (4-6 hours before test) Start drinking water and taking Vitamin B in excess. Vitamin B gets flushed out as yellow, giving your clear piss some color. 3-4 hours before test take 12 aspirin on a full stomach. It's not good for you, but it definitely won't kill or hospitalize you either. this produces false negatives sometimes. ****** although i think you should just face the facts that you use drugs and that you cannot participate in society the way non-drug users do. you should fail the test and face the consequences of your drug use. i don't deny to anyone that i use drugs and i don't try to trick anyone into thinking otherwise, including my parents. you're probably fucking up your mind by being secretive about somethign you love to do. soon you'll be fucking your dad. EDIT- OH I SEE YOU'VE PASSED GOOD JOB, YOU'RE STILL GOING TO FUCK YOUR DAD VERY SOON Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest happycase Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 I want to apologize for the foul things I just said. I dont' think you will fuck anyone. : ( I'm very sorry, I dont' know what came over me. I just wanted to help. Please don't hide your drug use and masturbatory fantasies from anyone. We accept you. We are like you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest abusivegeorge Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 you hitting your chest with both fists saying "nigga WHAT!!?" lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Sprigg Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 I want to revisit the concept of so much THC that you "break" the test. I want to know what this looks like. I'd like to think that the testing dipstick would just dissolve as if you were dipping it in 20 Baum hydrochloric acid. Or that the cup splits in half, spilling piss everywhere and the tester slowly looking up and locking eyes with you in disbelief and you hitting your chest with both fists saying "nigga WHAT!!?" and them passing you out of straight awe/fear. Post of the day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest green hausen Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 When i got my job i had to spit into a cup. There was no pissing. How would you cheat under those circumstances? And the medical man asked me if i had consumed any drugs or alcohol in the past 30 days. Does this mean they test for alcohol? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest happycase Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 Alcohol is out of your system lickity split, like 14 hours. Not to mention it's legal and your employer drinks it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest green hausen Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 Alcohol is out of your system lickity split, like 14 hours. Not to mention it's legal and your employer drinks it?? I know, so I was confused as to why he asked. Must have been an amatuer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntainer Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 hahaha you guys are fucking hilarious. i'm on a pretty decent high right now. love you all. even Mr Projection... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
encey Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 dondraduladions! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest cuntainer Posted July 26, 2010 Share Posted July 26, 2010 decided that i had to have a celebratory vape session, so it has commenced... god i love fucking the system. but pretty much the dudes i hung out with at work were all stoners, and hell sick dudes and easy going and one of them knew autechre, so now i know like 5 people in real life who like them... he's from iceland and spent some time in the uk, so i banked my chances on him being familiar with warp and he was and he saw autechre in 98, it's so strange when i meet people in real life with similar interests, it's so unfamiliar to me. today was a good day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pcock Posted July 27, 2010 Share Posted July 27, 2010 druid test Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rambo Posted July 27, 2010 Share Posted July 27, 2010 That's what i kept reading it as too. Anyway, there's absolutely no way you should stop taking lots of drugs just in order to get a job. That's an incredibly 1998-99 idea that simply doesn't relate to the real world. Just tell them that they would be funding your drug habit if they employed you and that you thought you had made that clear before the interview. After that just stare at them like you cant believe how stupid they are. Remember, anything they say from here on in can be countered with that uncompromising look. They are the idiots not you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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