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Job Centre bullshit rules


oscillik

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i've been unemployed since february and i have to call the job centre once a month and "report" how im doing in my search for a job, if i don't do enough they cut my benefits (which amounts to like 30 euro / day or some crap, im mainly living off of my music sales atm). everytime i call them i feel like im talking to customer support for some computer company or whatever, their advice always consist of the most basic no brainer "have you tried turning it off and on again?" bullshit. this week i have to go there in person and i have a feeling they're gonna try and force me to go back to driving a cab (which is the one job i'll never ever want to do again), since "cab drivers are always needed". i've told them i'll do fucking anything, but still they insist that i should be actively looking for cab work. fuck em. hope they don't read watmm. /somewhatofftopicrant

 

You aren't required to actually physically attend? That's quite lucky. I think the only way you'd be able to do that over here is if you were disabled, or incapacitated in some other way which meant that you couldn't attend in person. Even then, you would have to go through a demeaning assessment (which I have had to go through once before).

 

I don't think it's offtopic.

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Guest Pennywise

It annoys me that they don't have a water cooler in the job centre (in Brighton anyway). Especially when you go in for an appointment and end up waiting for 45 mins. I was always thirsty cos I had to walk there too

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I don't take anyone patronising me

 

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:beer:

glasses contain Ribena, and not beer. So as not to be a 'jakey'

 

 

strange oscillik, sounds very uneuropean to have a policy like that (referring to first post). britain don't make me sad.

 

As I said, this guy was obviously a jobsworth. And as someone else has already quite rightly pointed out, he was likely bored and wanted something to do.

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So, my last day of signing on at the job centre.

 

It's about 25ºC in Widnes, by the north-west coast, so it's pretty hot and humid here.

 

I've walked 3 miles to get there, and as some of you may or may not know, I'm a scrawny skinny cunt so I dehydrate pretty easily.

 

I get in the job centre and enter the queue, take out a bottle of soft drink that I had purchased 5 mins prior to entering the building and I open the bottle with a hiss of carbon dioxide.

 

And then the security guard comes up and tells me "can you put the top back on that please."

 

"What? Why?"

 

"It's policy, you can't drink in here"

 

"I'm not going to spill it, it's a hot day..."

 

"Can you put the top back on." (notice that I am not putting a question mark on these demands, that is because I wasn't asked - I was told. the tone of this security guard was authoritative from the get go.)

 

"This is bullshit."

 

"No it's not bullshit..."

 

"Yes it is. It's a hot day, I've just walked 3 miles to get here, and you're treating my like a 5 year old."

 

"I'm not treating you like a 5 year old..."

 

"Yes you are. I haven't spilled a drink since I was 3. I've had it with this place, I do not appreciate being patronised. Don't ever patronise me again. Now go away."

 

Bearing in mind that the job centre have been continually...difficult, especially in the past few months, hence my little outburst here.

 

I understand that there are policies, but they should be exercised in context. It is rather hot and humid here at the moment. A swig from a bottle of drink on a hot summer day should not get the fucking gestapo response.

 

Just needed to rant, guys.

 

Anyone else had any similar bullshit?

 

tell me about it - i was in the job centre today to sign on...they were incredibly rude and unhelpful throughout. i have also been told i was not allowed to take my coffee in with me before and i made a fuss about it...ended up having to finish it outside though lol.

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Guest sirch

strange oscillik, sounds very uneuropean to have a policy like that (referring to first post). britain don't make me sad.

 

hah!! Britain is VERY different to the rest of mainland Europe!

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Guest Gary C

Actually, I'm beginning to feel a bit sorry for the 'security guards'. Sure, they're stupid for properly enforcing rules in certain situations, but it's a rule made my someone higher than them. What if BCM threw hot coffee over someone or Oscillik was really downing vodka in the queue and vommed everywhere as he passed out?

Job centres are horrible places. Uncaring, draining and demeaning. But you don't exactly rail against the woman behind the counter who asks you to fill in this form, or the guy that ticks your allowance sheet, do you? Nope, you have a go at the security guard because he's detached enough from the organization that he can't really influence your benefits, but he represents the most annoying aspects of the system.

Bouncers and security guards are often disgusting humans, but in some part of their lizard-mind they believe that their job is benefiting you and society.

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Guest Shit Attack

hmmm if you were that thirsty why didnt you just take a drink after you bought it ? can sympathise tho, a while ago one of the big burly dumbfuck security guys in the jobcentre tried to shoulder barge me while the other 2 held the door shut, because they thought i was comiting benefits fraud or something ! which i wasnt.....or at least they didnt prove i was ;-D

 

(really wasnt for any government operatives reading this thrilling message)

 

the main thing is tho people like that are really trying to piss you off deliberately so better not to rise to it, cos youll lose either way fuckoooo's

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strange oscillik, sounds very uneuropean to have a policy like that (referring to first post). britain don't make me sad.

 

hah!! Britain is VERY different to the rest of mainland Europe!

 

cmon its all fuckin occident can't be that different.

we're also talking about the inventors of understatement

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Guest Gary C

Yep, just try not to rise to it... and you really shouldn't have sworn and been verbally aggressive in return. I'm all for free-speech and I don't really judge any words to be taboo (I swear a fuckload), but you've got to stay civilised if you want to win an argument.

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Actually, I'm beginning to feel a bit sorry for the 'security guards'. Sure, they're stupid for properly enforcing rules in certain situations, but it's a rule made my someone higher than them. What if BCM threw hot coffee over someone or Oscillik was really downing vodka in the queue and vommed everywhere as he passed out?

 

I wasn't. I was clearly dehydrated.

 

Job centres are horrible places. Uncaring, draining and demeaning. But you don't exactly rail against the woman behind the counter who asks you to fill in this form, or the guy that ticks your allowance sheet, do you? Nope, you have a go at the security guard because he's detached enough from the organization that he can't really influence your benefits, but he represents the most annoying aspects of the system.

 

If the woman behind the counter is being a patronising bitch, or the guy that ticks my allowance sheet is treating me like a piece of shit, yes I do rail against them.

 

 

hmmm if you were that thirsty why didnt you just take a drink after you bought it ? can sympathise tho, a while ago one of the big burly dumbfuck security guys in the jobcentre tried to shoulder barge me while the other 2 held the door shut, because they thought i was comiting benefits fraud or something ! which i wasnt.....or at least they didnt prove i was ;-D

 

(really wasnt for any government operatives reading this thrilling message)

 

the main thing is tho people like that are really trying to piss you off deliberately so better not to rise to it, cos youll lose either way fuckoooo's

 

I did take a drink when I bought it. I required more.

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Guest Gary C

Actually, I'm beginning to feel a bit sorry for the 'security guards'. Sure, they're stupid for properly enforcing rules in certain situations, but it's a rule made my someone higher than them. What if BCM threw hot coffee over someone or Oscillik was really downing vodka in the queue and vommed everywhere as he passed out?

 

I wasn't. I was clearly dehydrated.

 

Dehydrated from a drop in your vodka-levels, you slimy drunk!

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Actually, I'm beginning to feel a bit sorry for the 'security guards'. Sure, they're stupid for properly enforcing rules in certain situations, but it's a rule made my someone higher than them. What if BCM threw hot coffee over someone or Oscillik was really downing vodka in the queue and vommed everywhere as he passed out?

 

I wasn't. I was clearly dehydrated.

 

Dehydrated from a drop in your vodka-levels, you slimy drunk!

 

Exactly, so I needed to fill up on the old moloko

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aye that bouncer guy was perfectly justified to drag you out of there by the davinas and stomp on your glasses (with you wearing them).

 

He wasn't a bouncer. He was a security guard. Pushing late 40s, about 5 inches shorter than me, but making up for what he lacked in height with girth. In the stomach area. And it wasn't his abs.

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aye that bouncer guy was perfectly justified to drag you out of there by the davinas and stomp on your glasses (with you wearing them).

 

He wasn't a bouncer. He was a security guard. Pushing late 40s, about 5 inches shorter than me, but making up for what he lacked in height with girth. In the stomach area. And it wasn't his abs.

 

are you saying you could dominate him in a prison shower scenario?

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aye that bouncer guy was perfectly justified to drag you out of there by the davinas and stomp on your glasses (with you wearing them).

 

He wasn't a bouncer. He was a security guard. Pushing late 40s, about 5 inches shorter than me, but making up for what he lacked in height with girth. In the stomach area. And it wasn't his abs.

 

are you saying you could dominate him in a prison shower scenario?

 

Only if soap was involved.

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Guest Gary C

I'm pretty sure a gut would only be a hindrance if he had to chase you. No matter how fat he is, if he's more experienced, he could knock you down and drag you out of there. He could probably get you into a disgusting arm-hold before you've had time to throw a second punch.

 

Anyway, people are dicks. Rules is rules.

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aye that bouncer guy was perfectly justified to drag you out of there by the davinas and stomp on your glasses (with you wearing them).

 

He wasn't a bouncer. He was a security guard. Pushing late 40s, about 5 inches shorter than me, but making up for what he lacked in height with girth. In the stomach area. And it wasn't his abs.

 

are you saying you could dominate him in a prison shower scenario?

 

Only if soap was involved.

 

what other kind of prison shower scenario is there?

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I'm pretty sure a gut would only be a hindrance if he had to chase you. No matter how fat he is, if he's more experienced, he could knock you down and drag you out of there. He could probably get you into a disgusting arm-hold before you've had time to throw a second punch.

 

Anyway, people are dicks. Rules is rules.

 

I'm pretty sure that if he were to 'knock me down and drag me' out of there, over me justifiably being offended by his patronising and condescending demeanour towards me, I would have a rather good day in court afterwards...

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Guest Gary C

Describing him physically made it seem as though you were willing to get physical. But I just re-read the thread and you weren't. Nevermind.

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