Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 my friend is opening a pan-asian restaurant and we need some original fortune cookie lines, any ideas? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blir Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 "The bathroom is that way --->" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Calx Sherbet Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 HELP I'M BEING HELD PRISONER IN A CHINESE BAKERY Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest theSun Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 i had one once that said "pick another fortune cookie" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest my usernames always really suck Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 THAT WASN'T A FORTUNE COOKIE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Benedict Cumberbatch Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 I'm watching you you will meet a blonde midget stranger This cookie sponsored by rent-o-kill Enjoy this meal it may be your last Make my dough punk Hiya! Pan-Asian tonight hey? What, couldn't handle another burrito? Hows my driving? 1-800-555-5555 Chef wanted. [insert restaurant name here]. what're you looking at? tough guy are ya? Your destiny is to marry a fortune cookie fortune writer named Bill Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Confucius say: 14" sweatpants boner- pretty ok. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 HELP I'M BEING HELD PRISONER IN A CHINESE BAKERY lol i like this one a lot p.s. fuck you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idrn Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 don't look now but i think that guy is checking you out meh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 I'm watching you you will meet a blonde midget stranger This cookie sponsored by rent-o-kill Enjoy this meal it may be your last Make my dough punk Hiya! Pan-Asian tonight hey? What, couldn't handle another burrito? Hows my driving? 1-800-555-5555 Chef wanted. [insert restaurant name here]. what're you looking at? tough guy are ya? Your destiny is to marry a fortune cookie fortune writer named Bill these ones sound like the things written on taco bell hot sauce packets. some decent ones in there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest placidburp Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 "You are about to be banned from a forum on teh internets." witty? oh sorry. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 god i used to be so creative. i cant believe i cant come up with a damn thing. my brain is all gordoed up these days Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Benedict Cumberbatch Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 have you considered you may be a homosexual? have you considered you may be a hetrosexual? in a pastlife you were ugly too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Note to self: get more paper for inner monolo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Note To Bill Self. Bill me later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Sorry chief, fortunes are for Lifetime Members. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Share Posted September 9, 2009 Note to self: get more paper for inner monolo this is some really progressive thinking Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brandi_B Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 my friend is opening a pan-asian restaurant and we need some original fortune cookie lines, any ideas? Once you pop, you can't stop. my friend is opening a pan-asian restaurant and we need some original fortune cookie lines, any ideas? "Tomorrow will be your worst day, but every one after that will be you best" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Calx Sherbet Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 HELP I'M BEING HELD PRISONER IN A CHINESE BAKERY lol i like this one a lot p.s. fuck you what? oh, and maybe "brought to you by Carl's Jr." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
encey Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Confucius say: Man who live in glass house, should dress in basement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dementia Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 "Hello Neo, do you know who this is?" "NASDAQ 2055.01 + 17.24 0.85% DJIA 9519.86 + 22.52 0.24% S&P 1030.17 + 4.78 0.47%" Ideas: -Someone's funny grocery list -A target or something that'd flag the patron for a kill shot -suicide note Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Take this message to old man across the street, note the "strange weather" we're having and walk away. The sparrow mourns for two weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Siegecow Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 "man this shit is ridiculous... i'm fucking addicted to this whimsical lifestyle where i wake up, thats even if i went to sleep at all cuz so many nights lately i have much better things to do than sleep... and like, man, i'm dancing through the world like "hahahahahahh you white peasants suck at this" and like i'm moving so fast and for-once-in-my-life-not-trying-to-be-anything-other-than-what- the-fuck-i-actually-am that it's fucking fantastic. i find myself truly becoming more and more like the doctor, the kind of comments i make... they come naturally and brilliantly i might add. i'm literally texting myself ~15 one-liners/song-ideas per day and like, man, i dont even have to try... but when i do.. wow." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idrn Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 monosodium glutamate, bitch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idrn Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 your lemony hand towel is also my bum flannel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.