Guest ezkerraldean Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 So I live with a couple friends, and we had a bit of a mexican problem. Our compost bin couldn't close securely, and we didn't take out the compost frequently enough, so naturally the mexican population rose. We resolved to take the compost our more often, and we got a new seal-able compost bin. But there were still a bunch of mexicans around, and they were pissing me off. So I set up a bunch of redneck vigilante groups. They worked super great, and caught most of the mexicans. Most of my house mates thought this was a great idea. However, another friend of mine just moved in with us, and she was horrified at the rednecks. She said something like "would you like to be trapped in a fishing net and drown in the Rio Grande?", implying that, since I don't want to drown, it is unfair to kill mexicans. I just looked at her dumbfounded. Then she said "look, the mexicans feel trapped. They want to be free." I said "I don't think you can attribute complicated feelings like that to hispanics". Then she said "oh, I know they aren't feeling it, it just makes me sad looking at them." I said "would you rather leave food out then so they don't starve to death." She said "But that's different, I don't want to play an active role in making the mexicans miserable". At this point a mexican is buzzing around my head, and, as a reaction, I lynched it. She stormed into her room. Now, I should say that getting along with my house mates is really important to me. I took down my "spics go home" sign, and I try hard not to report them to immigration services when she's in the room. Fortunately most of them are gone back south of the border, and there are only 1 or 2 at any given time now. It's not that much to put up with to avoid fighting with he people I live with, or having them leave passive aggressive notes and shit. But seriously, what the fuck! What should I do if the dirty spics come back? EDIT: PS, I did not mean this to be offensive to all republicans. I know plenty of republicans who would not espouse compassion for mexicans. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Root5 Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 Lol. I'm confused why you replaced vegetarian with republican though. Surely the republicans are harsher on the Mexicans then the democrats. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoodie Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 lol story. Catch all mexicans alive and bring them to her room with a big friendly smile on your face. Then she can do with them as she sees fit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest glasse Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 i was wondering where is the internet actually located? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0F49bAcU7Tk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ezkerraldean Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 Lol. I'm confused why you replaced vegetarian with republican though. Surely the republicans are harsher on the Mexicans then the democrats. lol yeah but republican sounds more like vegetarian, innit. hey guys come and post in my shit thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
encey Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 clever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hma Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 Reminds me of Mark Twain short stories...probably similar bullshit concentration per line. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehauntingsoul Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 So I live with a couple friends, and we had a bit of a mexican problem. Our compost bin couldn't close securely, and we didn't take out the compost frequently enough, so naturally the mexican population rose. We resolved to take the compost our more often, and we got a new seal-able compost bin. But there were still a bunch of mexicans around, and they were pissing me off. So I set up a bunch of redneck vigilante groups. They worked super great, and caught most of the mexicans. Most of my house mates thought this was a great idea. However, another friend of mine just moved in with us, and she was horrified at the rednecks. She said something like "would you like to be trapped in a fishing net and drown in the Rio Grande?", implying that, since I don't want to drown, it is unfair to kill mexicans. I just looked at her dumbfounded. Then she said "look, the mexicans feel trapped. They want to be free." I said "I don't think you can attribute complicated feelings like that to hispanics". Then she said "oh, I know they aren't feeling it, it just makes me sad looking at them." I said "would you rather leave food out then so they don't starve to death." She said "But that's different, I don't want to play an active role in making the mexicans miserable". At this point a mexican is buzzing around my head, and, as a reaction, I lynched it. She stormed into her room. Now, I should say that getting along with my house mates is really important to me. I took down my "spics go home" sign, and I try hard not to report them to immigration services when she's in the room. Fortunately most of them are gone back south of the border, and there are only 1 or 2 at any given time now. It's not that much to put up with to avoid fighting with he people I live with, or having them leave passive aggressive notes and shit. But seriously, what the fuck! What should I do if the dirty spics come back? EDIT: PS, I did not mean this to be offensive to all republicans. I know plenty of republicans who would not espouse compassion for mexicans. dude I have a friend who can be stupid like that sometimes. It's a very very difficult situation to be in because you get so angry with them for being so unrealistic but at the same time you value your friendship with them and don't want to throw it all away over something stupid. But fuck.... Mexicans? You should secretly breed Somalians in the basement in jumbo garbage bags and release them on the house and then see how quickly her attitude towards killing changes. Drastic, yes, but effective Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Root5 Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 Im fairly sure Matthew didnt say "Do unto mexicans as you would have them do unto you", and if he did i'd lulz at a spic with a newpaper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehauntingsoul Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 ezkerraldean, this is a grand parody thread, thanks for the lols Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chassis Posted December 15, 2009 Share Posted December 15, 2009 Dey tuk rrrrr jeeeerbs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rubin Farr Posted December 16, 2009 Share Posted December 16, 2009 Lou Dobbs loves Mexicans. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ezkerraldean Posted December 16, 2009 Share Posted December 16, 2009 Iron My Shirt that's what mexicans are for! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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