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Christian Side Hug (CSH)


Alzado

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praying that this is a joke

 

for example - almost every birthday card over there seems to mention being "grateful to god" that you have a birthday. that was kind of unnerving when i saw that. i've never seen that over here.

:wtf: thats crazy shit man

 

yes it's true, this is not a joke. but then again i did only check out the cards in Walmart (take that how you will). but i have it on good authority that is the "norm".

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let's stay on topic please. this thread is about christian side hugs, not an open call for you pussies to cry about your experiences with oppressive religions.

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let's stay on topic please. this thread is about christian side hugs, not an open call for you pussies to cry about your experiences with oppressive religions.

 

i've got to say, the side-hug has been a strange non-event for me. there was a time when seeing something like this would elicit incredulous surprise or merriment, and i'd join in on the christianity bashing, maybe take it too far... perhaps claim that every single american is a babbling glittered up mentally handicapped racist fuckwitt; then get flamed by a turbo closet patriot.

 

but no, i saw this, i registered it, i accepted it at face value... and my mind drifted. it wasn't bizzare or weird any more, just yeah... it seemed like a choice cutlet for all the internet atheist hero alliance to feast upon. oh look at the silly close-minded christians, glenn beck is a douche, sarah palin is thick, legalise weed bla bla bla.

 

i think joyrex has a secret plan to turn watmm into some hybrid REDDIT/DIGG/SCAT-COMPENDIUM.

 

/drunk on tea

 

*side-hug*

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all of the above is proof ive been spending too much time on the internet recently. . damn you work that involves computers

 

fuck

 

ignore it all

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I always love how philosophy pretty much destroys all conventional ideas of religion. I'm a huge atheist (or I guess agnostic to be specific) and I always get a huge kick out of how my philosophy prof constantly makes religion into some huge joke. Maybe one day the Catholics will decide to start reading philosophy but first things first they need to have some time to wrap their head around that brand-spanking new theory called Evolution which was only made in 1859 and you can't blame them for being slow readers... I mean they believe in people turning bread into fish and shit.

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whats your story? why'd you crack?

 

A lot of reasons. I was raised in a Christian church that no one knew what to call the denomination (until the pastor decided to research it, about 11 years after the church formed, and decided it was a Neo-Pentacostal faction with Charismatic leanings [how's that for a mindfuck?].).

 

The church went down the shitter, I spent less time there, started working in the local theatre productions, got married to a woman that would rather do something she knows is a sin than spend one sermon in a church, read "The Mist" by Stephen King (I did like the biker's line they added in the movie, "I believe in God, I just don't think He's the asshole you think He is."), but realized that I didn't like having ties to what some people take to a level of fanaticism, like these dumbass touring rapper teenagers that haven't the fuckingest what they're actually saying. "Pure thoughts"? They don't exist, and if they do, you're either in a coma, or you're three years old.

 

And the sex issue drives me absolutely nuts; when I was developing sexually, I recall equating the message "sex before marriage is wrong" with "Sex is wrong", and being very confused by sexual urges. I was a virgin until I was 23 because I was afraid of the "spiritual ramifications", which I now know were a smokescreen; spiritual actions have spiritual ramifications, and physical actions have physical ramifications, and I should have understood that earlier. I probably would have gotten laid a lot, too.

 

NEVER, EVER, EVER try to suppress the sexuality of a Scorpio. It will come back and bite you in the ass, or rape you.

 

As of this moment, I wouldn't say there isn't a higher power (I'm probably still too afraid it might strike me down or give me the AIDS), but I do believe Jesus made some good points. Paul, however, was an asshole. I mean, come on; "You thought about it, you might as well have done it."? THAT fucked with my head REAL good as an adolescent. I've had to break down and rebuild my entire thinking process JUST TO GET TO WHERE I AM TODAY, and I'm still working out the kinks in my mental state. It was only last year that I realized the religion I would have claimed five years before is symbolized by an archaic instrument of torture and execution, and I've recently started to understand the capitalist aspect of religion, and why some people refer to it as a crutch.

 

Religion, in my case, was a mental disorder that I have had to work around.

 

Whoa . . . um . . . way more than I thought I typed . . .

 

tl;dr version:

It sucked, that's why.

i don't want to trivialize your life and struggles but that is fascinating. good luck man,, good luck.

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let's stay on topic please. this thread is about christian side hugs, not an open call for you pussies to cry about your experiences with oppressive religions.

Sorry, I was just laying bait for Uncle Ramone.

 

i don't want to trivialize your life and struggles but that is fascinating. good luck man,, good luck.

It's not nearly as fascinating as one-armed shoulder slinging being referred to as a "Christian Side-Hug", apparently.

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maybe christians should learn how to control their erections better. or better yet, if they were to masturbate, all that pent up sexual energy wouldn't be thrust onto an innocent recipient of a hug.

 

fucking awkward virgins.

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Guest abusivegeorge

maybe christians should learn how to control their erections better. or better yet, if they were to masturbate, all that pent up sexual energy wouldn't be thrust onto an innocent recipient of a hug.

 

fucking awkward virgins.

 

LOL, never heard it put like that before.

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