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Sending emails to companies - a fun pastime


Guest Rambo

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Guest Coalbucket PI
Dear Rubicon,

 

I really really like your delicious fruit drinks. Please keep making these terrific juices. They are truly smashing.

 

Regards,

Dan

 

Dear Dan,

 

We are very pleased that you enjoy our Rubicon products and hope that you continue to enjoy them for many years to come.

 

Thank you so much for taking the time to contact us your email has been passed on to our Sales & Marketing Team

 

 

 

Kind regards

 

Leanne Thomasson

Consumer Care Team

 

 

Rubicon got me through a particularly rough hangover and I just wanted to say cheers

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I complained once about Zappos.com and they gave me, like, free overnight shipping and blowjobs for life.

I actually felt really bad about complaining, because they were so nice about it.

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i complained to amazon once about not receiving a record i had ordered and they were really shitty about sending me free merchandise. but i got free merchandise any how. so it kind of evened out.

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Just sent Amazon a nice email:

Hello there,

I am just writing to inform you of my feelings towards your Prime service where you pay a yearly fee and get eligable items from Amazon the next day if ordered by a certain time. I have been using Amazon for quite a few years now for ordering all sorts of stuff.

 

I decided to take advantage of your very generous offer to upgrade my account to a Prime account for 30 days without charge, and if I like it I pay the yearly fee and continue to get your next day delivery service.

I placed a couple of orders during my trial period and looked forward to the swift service I was about to receive in getting my material goods the next day. Not that my life revolves around getting all these unessentials as soon as physically possible but it does add a bit of excitement to my boring working day when I know there is going to be something waiting at my house when I get home for me to open up and use.

 

Unfortunately on one and a half of thesae orders the delivery was unsuccessful and reached me the day after the next day after the day I ordered it. I can't really place the whole blame on any single entity as I couldn't see whether it would have been a posting error at your company or my local postman not being up to the standard I would expect. Especially when they want to put the price of postage right up because of a lack of users. Right, so a lack of custom makes you automatically think that putting the price up is the best thing to do to bring back in what once were your customers.

 

Anyhow, I unfortunately didn't receive some of the items the next day so have made an executive decision to cancel my Prime subscription as it seems like the payment for it would not be worth in. I shall however continue using Amazon unless my computer runs out of battery.

 

Hopefully this may be looked into in the future to avoid giving new Prime trialers the same scenario.

 

Regards,

 

spratters

 

I await a reply.

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A friend of mine has done alot of these mails to company's, mostly Dutch, under a nickname. He just did his first email in English and got a very fast reply, from Nintendo:

 

 

Good evening,

 

My name is Boger Simons, 37 years old. Ever since the Nintendo Entertainment System I have been inseperable from your consoles and games. This has resulted in cases such as sleeping in from of the store when the SNES was released. I was to get that console at any cost, and preferably, with as many games as possible. This even though we used to keep a close eye on the pennies. My father passed away at young age and my mother is suffering from a unilateral paralysis. Ever since Pokémon was available on your handhelds, this series has become one of my all-time favorites. No Pokémon game is missing from my collection. Magnificent it was to capture all Pokémon, 150 at first, but even now in Black and White all 649. Sometimes it just baffles my mind how you managed to invent so many different Pokémon. Every Pokémon has some kind of feature which makes it unique. Take for example Cubone with its distinguished skull, or my personal favorite Lapras. Still, I wondered about something ever since Pokémon Red, but also the Pokémon anime. Pokémon #50, Diglett is a molelike-piglike digdugging Pokémon. In the anime this translates to extraordinarily funny foolishnesses when the digging of this specific Pokémon seems to cause earthquakes. Its funny face and squily voice are all we see, though the arising question is of course: is this all? What does the underside of a Diglett actually look like? Is this something that has never been thought about, and for that reason is evaded? I am very curious wether or not I could be helped with this problem, while digging for an answer.

 

Yours sincerily,

 

Boger

Simons

 

Their response was not what he exactly wanted, they didn't quite took the bait:

 

Hi Boger, thanks for contacting us.

 

We love hearing from our longtime fans, especially our Pokemon fans. I really enjoyed reading your email. It brought back fond memories of me waiting outside stores eagerly waiting for the first Virtual Boy. In answer to your question about Diglett, I'm afraid there isn't an answer. The answer might be revealed in the future; however, many details about our games and characters in the games, remain mysteries, left to the active imaginations of our players.

 

You can always check out the Official Pokemon website at http://www.pokemo.com.

 

Sincerely,

 

He also drew Seaking in paint very accurate and sent it to a fish restaurant and pretended he was six. He got a mail back asking what the name of the fish was and that is was pretty.

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Just sent Amazon a nice email:

Hello there,

I am just writing to inform you of my feelings towards your Prime service where you pay a yearly fee and get eligable items from Amazon the next day if ordered by a certain time. I have been using Amazon for quite a few years now for ordering all sorts of stuff.

 

I decided to take advantage of your very generous offer to upgrade my account to a Prime account for 30 days without charge, and if I like it I pay the yearly fee and continue to get your next day delivery service.

I placed a couple of orders during my trial period and looked forward to the swift service I was about to receive in getting my material goods the next day. Not that my life revolves around getting all these unessentials as soon as physically possible but it does add a bit of excitement to my boring working day when I know there is going to be something waiting at my house when I get home for me to open up and use.

 

Unfortunately on one and a half of thesae orders the delivery was unsuccessful and reached me the day after the next day after the day I ordered it. I can't really place the whole blame on any single entity as I couldn't see whether it would have been a posting error at your company or my local postman not being up to the standard I would expect. Especially when they want to put the price of postage right up because of a lack of users. Right, so a lack of custom makes you automatically think that putting the price up is the best thing to do to bring back in what once were your customers.

 

Anyhow, I unfortunately didn't receive some of the items the next day so have made an executive decision to cancel my Prime subscription as it seems like the payment for it would not be worth in. I shall however continue using Amazon unless my computer runs out of battery.

 

Hopefully this may be looked into in the future to avoid giving new Prime trialers the same scenario.

 

Regards,

 

spratters

 

I await a reply.

 

Here is the reply.

 

Hello spratters ,

Thank you for contacting Amazon.co.uk.

First, allow me to apologise for the inconvenience and disappointment this issue has caused.

I understand that you have tried to avail of the 30 day Free trial for Amazon Prime and I regret to hear that you were not satisfied with the offer that we have provided for the subscription. I also understand that due to this you have now decided to discontinue with the trial.

 

I know this has been a disappointing experience for you, and I'll be sure to bring this to the attention of the appropriate people at our company. It is always important for us to hear how customers react to all aspects of shopping at Amazon.co.uk. Strong customer feedback like yours helps us continue to improve the selection and service we provide, and we appreciate the time you took to contact us.

 

Again, I am very sorry for the inconvenience and disappointment this issue has caused, nevertheless I sincerely hope that you will give us another chance to prove the quality of our service to you. I can assure you that we will do everything we can to help make your next experience more rewarding.

 

Thank you for shopping at Amazon.co.uk.

 

 

No freebies there.

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  • 1 month later...
Guest futuregirlfriend

Wrote this to Soreen. No reply yet, probably 'cause of Christmas, but I'm hoping for a coupon if not a year's supply of malt loaf.

 

soreen.PNG

 

and_a_happy_new_year.jpg

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Guest futuregirlfriend

Possibly the wrong thread for it since it's a legitimate complaint. Please turn the other cheek about my not turning the other cheek.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest futuregirlfriend

Just as an update on my ordeal with the burnt malt loaf

 

soreen2.jpg

soreen3.jpg

IMG_1269.jpg

 

not in shot properly: three (3) coupons entitling me to free fruit or malt loaf up to the value of £1.29

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Guest Eggylips

If you are interested in this kind of thing you would probably enjoy the book "Letters from a nut"

 

"Ted L. Nancy is the pseudonym used by the comedian Barry Marder, author of a number of prank letters which have been published in a series of bestselling books under the titles Letters from a Nut, More Letters from a Nut, Extra Nutty!: Even More Letters from a Nut, and the new book All New Letters from a Nut.

Nancy specializes in letters to unsuspecting celebrities and organizations; these missives typically consist of off-the-wall queries and much of the entertainment derives from the replies as individuals and institutions endeavor to respond politely to the author's often absurd requests and outlandish proposals."

 

AllNewLetters-ToEmbassy%20Suites.grid-5x2.jpg

 

The book I have has a nice format or letter/reply, and some great moments, lovely coffee table addition!

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