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T3551ER

Knob Twiddlers
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  1. Yes! So many fond memories, sounds like @ambermonkhas em too. Played some more last night, finally got my controller settings tweaked, started killing it. So much fun, but really a dearth of players. If anyone here has a switch and wants to game hit me up: SW-5691-5848-1592
  2. Played all weekend on the Switch. There is no updated texture. There is no updated controls. You have to (if you don't have a N64 controller) go into the console settings to switch the buttons/layout to work properly. The framerate dips exactly as it did in the original when there are 4 people throwing proximity mines and everything is blowing up. There is no voice chat. You have to find people via friend codes because there is no lobby/matchmaking. It is fucking fantastic. The audience for this shit is going to be so niche because unless you are an OG player and are willing to push past the barriers to entry (specifically, the controller remapping, having to work around the fact that there is no lobby/matchmaking nor any chat feature), you will hate this. It probably doesn't help that Graslu007, the current Goldeneye World Champion and true guru of all things Goldeneye is shitting on this because it's not as good as emulators already available on PC (I'm not going to argue that point). For those willing to push past what are, yes, some annoyances, what awaits you are a replication of the feeling you got when you sat in a smoky dorm room, playing this shit until your eyeballs bled and the nighttime sky turned into day. I can not describe how awesome it was to slip back into this shit and, although this is weird, the fact that it janks and jerks the way the actual original game did has made the experience all the more pleasurable. Do I want the Xbox remaster that was in works? Of course. But this is truly a wonderful gift. Some additional caveats: I played exclusively w/ east coasters as I know cross region play is fucked. I experienced probably 6-7 slowdowns in 4-5 hours of play. that's it. I lost a lot because still was fucking w/ controls have to re-memorize the maps, etc. but it was NEVER due to netplay. People who didn't play back in the day don't realize that 007 is a head game - yes, you have to be precise with your strikes, but it's as much about playing the high-speed chess game that is Goldeneye. Knowing where your opponent is, knowing exactly what their health is looking like, using the diagonal strafe to increase speed to close the distance between you and the power weapons (and knowing at a glance / calculating how far away your opponent is) is a completely lost art in the era of modern gaming.
  3. Ty for posting this (and all the other folks who chimed in about this one). Started watching it a couple of nights ago (apparently the whole movie - and I'm pretty sure it's actually the remastered version but a little difficult to tell b/c even the remaster is only 1080P) is on YouTube: I'm sort of continuously blown away by both the cinematography and the direction. There are some shots here that I ... like, this MF was doing shit back in 1975 that people today wouldn't/couldn't/don't do. I'm only about a third through and there have been at least 3 sequences that just defy logic. Dude was a master, utterly incredible stuff. Looking forward to finishing this off when I have time.
  4. I'm with you. In some ways the end is sort of that "it's the mystery that endures" thing. Although ofc I want more, it's probably better that my mind sits on precipice and wonders what's past the top of the stairs than actually knows. But, lol, ofc I still want to see it, even though I know it probably wouldn't match my imagination. Also, agreed - it's pm a perfectly self-contained game with a perfect ending. I'm more than happy with it as it is.
  5. My daughter (much to my wife's chagrin - she hated it) repeatedly asks for us to play "cat game." I loved it an even on playthrough like 20 I still am movef by it (particularly the ending). Lots of depth to the story/world building, particularly if you take the time to deviate from the main quest. Sad, beautiful game.
  6. Just Cause 4 - mainly bc it just went up on PS Plus Pass or whatever TF it's called. Pretty fun, mindless with excellent traversal mechanics. But, also, could see how this could get ultra repetitive. Perfect for blowing off steam/not caring too much about actually getting through it. Gravity Rush Remastered - midway through the first game. Fun little indie PS game, has a very anime feel in terms of the story etc. plus a fun mechanic. Oneechambara Origins - pretend you're playing Dead Rising but instead of being based on sort of third person shooting it's based on hack n'slash (e.g., Ninja Gaiden, DMC and Bayonetta). Bloody, borderline hentai, mindless fun with combat that is slightly jank but also probably deeper than it looks on first blush. Again, free on PS Pass and I went ahead and shelled out 10$ for the extra levels etc. cause GD it's FUN.
  7. 2nd'd. I think the way they stealth dropped this directly after Rick and Morty is pretty genius - makes me imagine some utterly stoned college kid leaving this on accidentally and coming back in the room a few minutes later from a smoke break and being like w.t. FFFFFFFFFF
  8. Doctor Sleep Hmmmph. A bit conflicted on this one. I really enjoyed the novel, and would argue that the Director's Cut of the movie nicely elevates the source material and enhances it in many ways. Flanagan also does an excellent job walking a tightrope between staying true to the spirit of King's vision of the Shining while incorporating callbacks to the Kubrick film that King hates. That deft dance alone is worthy of praise - as is the extremely excellent acting from literally everyone (even minor characters have a depth and groundedness that you often feel in a King novel, but never quite translate to film). I think the hard thing here is that Stanley friggin' Kubrick made the Shining. It's a singular vision by an auteur whose style really is inimitable, so any visual callbacks kind of jolt you into remembering, "oh riiiight, the Shining, how fucking bonkers/unreal was that?" Because the rest of the film is decidedly NOT a Kubrick film (that's not a slight - the film doesn't try to be, and that's a good thing), these moments end up inevitably begging comparison which takes you out of the film a bit (or, it did me ... it would have been amazing to never have seen the Shining, watch this, and then watch that). I sound pretty dour on this but I'm not - it's one of the best Kind adaptations out there, because a)Flanagan really gets how to take the spirit of King's stuff and translate that into the medium of film, something other people seem to struggle with b)it paces itself out in a way that makes the movie feel like reading/moving through a Kind novel with enough space left for introspection/quieter beats that characterize his work (everyone seems to think it's a mad dash between point a to b to murder in his work but that's not right - it's the spaces in between where you fall in love with his characters that makes the horror stuff so... horrifying). Honestly, having done some work as a hospice volunteer, I can't believe how accurate a lot of the early bits are surrounding the way people die. Those conversations are bold and frankly deserve lauding on their own - I can't remember the last time... no, anytime, I saw something in a non-drama that so accurately, directly, realistically, and tenderly addressed the truth of death. Maybe Logan? Anyway, some real truths being thrown down there, and the conversation Danny has about addiction and his trauma's once he gets to the Overlook... another bold move. It's so natural in the moment, but afterwards I can't help but think "how the hell is this in a horror movie?" If you watch this, 100% watch the Director's Cut. I think, perhaps, the most exciting thing about this is: Flanagan has basically been making a case his entire career that he should be the person making Stephen King adaptations and now that we know he's been handed the reigns to (more than likely, if it gets funded) make the Dark Tower, I reallllly can't wait to see what he's going to do with that. My guess? Knock it out of the fucking park.
  9. Chug a lug Donna. *pours one out*
  10. https://consequence.net/2022/12/angelo-badalamenti-twin-peaks-composer-dead-at-85/
  11. Smile - mileage will vary. It's weird, I watched It Follows which carries a similar premise and was mostly bored. Or, maybe, for a horror film, I wasn't very horrified. Some people have called this a It Follows ripoff but other than a central conceit, that's where the comparisons end (for me). This movie scared the ever living beejesus put of me. I had to break it up into 25 minutes segments because a)im old and b)it was just too much for me to handle in one sitting. I would have watched this thing through my fingers and probably had a stroke if I saw it in the theater. Now, it's not that it does anything completely new. It's just that it does what it does very very well. The tension build before the jump scares are played so expertly that even knowing they were coming didn't detract from the anxiety. It helps that the film makes it clear early on that you absolutely can't trust what you are seeing, and the the main characters break with reality means everything, literally everything could be... dangerous. A face out of focus in the background could reveal itself to be a snarling, malevolent thing or it could just be... a face out of focus. There is also some really interesting commentary on trauma and what it does to lives. It gives the film some extra layers that aren't strictly necessary for a horror film, but add a nice sense of depth to the proceedings. And, for a film whose previews made me think "wait, didn't Aphex Twin already do this whole big scary smile thing like 20 years ago"? I'm pleased to say that a few scenes near the end make it TOTALLY CLEAR (at least to me) that yes they are aware of the phenomenon - therr are some visual that seem way yoo close to the Come to Daddy vid to be happenstance. Knowing what I know now it wouldn't terrify me to watch it again (probably) because I know when the scares ares coming/not. Doesn't matter, much respect for taking a concept and just executing on it over and over. 9.5 rdj grins out of 10
  12. Lair 2022 (Dir. Neil Marshall) The short version of this review: I watched this movie so you don’t have to. The long version: Before we move forward, I think it’s important to acknowledge that not every horror movie has to be a “AAA” horror movie. I love all sorts of horror, and that includes the wonderful “B” horror movies whose general sloppiness, corny dialogue and middling production is made up for with heart, enthusiasm, and a gentle wink and nod at the audience. The difference between a great B movie and poor one is that the former KNOWS what it is and leans into its strengths, while the latter strains against its limitations towards something it can never be, instead of embracing them. Alas, this is one of the latter. The general plot goes something like this: A military pilot is shot down over the deserts of Afghanistan, and while running from local insurgents ends up in an abandoned bunker that was (apparently) used by the Russians to – and I’m not joking here – integrate alien DNA from a gigantic ship that crashed there into human beings to create super soldiers. Mind you, we don’t definitively find this out until about 2/3rds of the way through the movie, but at that point your eyes will have probably glazed over and/or you’ve decided to doomscroll on your phone so I’m just going to go ahead and clarify that point for anyone who has tried to watch this movie. Never mind the fact that these creatures, while “they can wrap their tongue/tentacles around your face and read your mind to figure out how to defeat you” also seem to act in a completely unorganized fashion for most of the film, more like animals that any sort of directed force. (I’m just saying, maybe the one piece of verisimilitude in this film is showing that the Russians might have a lot of tech, but little foresight when it comes to actual organized invasions). The film seems intent on reviewing the Wikipedia on “top horror movies of the past 20 years” and randomly checking off boxes in no particular order: Tough but hot military chick who is destined to survive the monsters/insurgents/poor dialogue against all odds? Check Ragtag bunch of military grunts with one unique identifying quality a piece (“oh, that one’s a kleptomaniac!”) who will die somewhere in the middle half of the movie but you literally won’t remember their name 15 seconds later? Check A blossoming romance between the hot military chick and the obvious leader who isn’t the commander officer but eventually becomes the de facto commanding office when the actual commanding officer dies? Check A gigantic alien space ship? Check A gigantic alien? Check An autopsy on a corpse that comes alive even though you thought it was dead!!? Check “We’re running out of ammo!” Check A dark hallway with smoke and strobe lights (how does this place even have power after 40 years)? Check The kicker here is: this thing could have been pretty fun. On the surface, that checklist of items could have made for a chill, lazy Sunday afternoon movie if the whole things wasn’t straining so hard to seem like it was a “good” horror movie. Unfortunately, every element is carried off so poorly (from the direction, to the acting to the dialogue, to the special effects) that even the seams have seams. This movie ends with our “final girls/guys” driving at top speed (roughly 90 mph) in a jeep away from what we have already been told is the “largest sub-nuclear explosive device ever deployed” for approximately 15 seconds before the bomb hits. I’m no scientist but I somehow doubt that this would be sufficient for them to survive but, of course, they do. As the camera pans back and they try desperately to get the jeep to start (“Come on, baby, come on!” exhorts our leader as he cranks the engine repeatedly until it, of course, roars back to life) I’m left the with the lingering thought that, maybe, just maybe, there is a world where that sub-nuclear blast was large enough to completely the envelope not only the characters but the film itself, utterly obliterating it from existence itself (or, at the very least, from my memory). Bonus review text In 2005, an relatively unknown director named Neil Marshall created a low budget horror masterpiece called The Descent that managed to achieve the trifecta of positive critical review, almost unanimous viewer adulation, and a huge 57.1$ haul against a measly ~$4 million budget. The film featured believable characters who acted like actual human beings, whose dialogue felt unforced and nuanced, and who faced both situations that might happen to actual human beings (being trapped in a cave system underground) and ones that no one will likely every face (fending off a brood of underground mutant creatures/monsters). It was not only a great horror movie, it was a great movie, that used its horror trappings to reveal deeper insights into the human condition (as all great horror movies do). You might be asking yourself, “Why is tessier talking about a film from 15 years ago instead talking about the film this review is about?” To which I respond: “Because it’s abundantly clear after watching The Lair that someone has kidnapped Neil Marshall and replaced him with a body double and WE NEED TO GET THE WORD OUT NOW” #FREENEILMARSHALL
  13. Came here to post this. Crazy, feel like this came out of nowhere (but sounds like he preferred to keep his diagnosis quiet while still going to cons and whatnot for the fans. RIP, legend.
  14. Enjoying this! Some great tracks on here - currently stuck on Tramic's breakbeat slammer Starbeast, the eassae Joyspace Die jam, and Polymetric Experiment (love the restraint here - not dropping the break until the late quarter is a great payoff to the build of the track). Nice work all!
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