Guest placidburp Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 A man is having a costume party where the theme is emotions. He hears the doorbell ring, opens the door and there is a girl dressed all in pink with a feather boa. The guy asks "what have you come as" the Girl answered "I'm tickled pink!". "Nice one!" says the host. "Come on in and have a drink". 5 minutes later he hears the doorbell again and there is a guy dressed all in green. "What have you come as" the host asks. "I'm green with envy" he says. "Haha! Brilliant! come in and have a drink." 5 minutes later the doorbell rings again the man opens it and there are two big Jamaicans standing there naked one with penis in a bowl of yellow stuff, and the other one with his penis jammed inside a pear. Shocked, the host says "What the!!?? What the hell have you come as?!" One of them answers "Well mon, I'm fucking dis custard and he's come in dis pear!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brian trageskin Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 C'est vrai, je vois bien Hugo en train de sniffer la coke, pendant qu'il écrit les misérable tout en enculant la bonne. cet homme est fou Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ivan Lennovitz Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 What's brown, nasty and floats on water? Somali Pirates. My girlfriend’s just had an emergency operation on her hands. I keep calling to see how it went, but she’s not picking up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rightsidedrive Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 so little johnny is chilling with his friends up to no good, you, skipping class and what not. A hot young teacher seems them from the second floor and screams at them to get back to class as she runs down the stairs to collar them. Well, her high hells cause her to stumble and she land at the base of the stairs legs akimbo, she was wearing a skirt. Little johnny and his friends can do nothing but gape, which is natural a such a young age. The principal, who happens to have a romantic interest in the teacher, decides to make an example out of the three boys and drags them to the office. To the first one, he asks, peter, how much did you see of the teacher when she fell? Well, the boy stutters, I just saw her ankles, 2 months expelled yells the principal. And you, Jeremiah, how much did you see? Well, the shifts nerviously, I saw her calves; 4 months expelled screams the principal. A finally, little johnny, how much did you see? To which johnny responds, well i guess I aint ever seeing you again!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 so little johnny is chilling with his friends up to no good, you, skipping class and what not. A hot young teacher seems them from the second floor and screams at them to get back to class as she runs down the stairs to collar them. Well, her high hells cause her to stumble and she land at the base of the stairs legs akimbo, she was wearing a skirt. Little johnny and his friends can do nothing but gape, which is natural a such a young age. The principal, who happens to have a romantic interest in the teacher, decides to make an example out of the three boys and drags them to the office. To the first one, he asks, peter, how much did you see of the teacher when she fell(duck sound)? Well, the boy stutters, I just saw her ankles, 2 months expelled yells the principal. And you, Jeremiah, how much did you see*PARP*? Well, the *shifts nerviously* I saw her calves; 4 months (rasberried sigh) the principal. A finally, little johnny, how much did you see?To which johnny responds, well i guess I aint ever seeing you again!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rightsidedrive Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chaosmachine Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 a man walks into a bar. ouch! (it was a gay bar) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Dirty Protest Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 Re: sig ↨ As a kid, I always enjoyed beating Wrestlefest and Superstars while on acid, ive always been quite argumental. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr lopez Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 So I went to a politically correct convention really drunk. When I got there I totally African Americaned out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sneaksta303 Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 So I went to a politically correct convention really drunk. When I got there I totally African Americaned out. don't make me call you out. that's twice now. dig deeper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dr lopez Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 So I went to a politically correct convention really drunk. When I got there I totally African Americaned out. don't make me call you out. that's twice now. dig deeper. lol it's not like any other post invented their jokes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sneaksta303 Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 lol maybe it's just because I saw it YESTERDAY (again) and it was fresh in my mind. I'm just talking shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneToThirtySix Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 "Good grief! The comedian's a bear!" "No he's a-not, he's a-wearin' a neck-a tie!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AJW Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 Whats the smallest pub in the world? The Thalidomide Arms Hahahahahahahahahahah I've never laughed so heartily in all me days sonny bo. tell another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rightsidedrive Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 A man is having a costume party where the theme is emotions. He hears the doorbell ring, opens the door and there is a girl dressed all in pink with a feather boa. The guy asks "what have you come as" the Girl answered "I'm tickled pink!". "Nice one!" says the host. "Come on in and have a drink". 5 minutes later he hears the doorbell again and there is a guy dressed all in green. "What have you come as" the host asks. "I'm green with envy" he says. "Haha! Brilliant! come in and have a drink." 5 minutes later the doorbell rings again the man opens it and there are two big Jamaicans standing there naked one with penis in a bowl of yellow stuff, and the other one with his penis jammed inside a pear. Shocked, the host says "What the!!?? What the hell have you come as?!" One of them answers "Well mon, I'm fucking dis custard and he's come in dis pear!" haha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
essines Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 need more dead baby jokes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pcock Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 what do you call a sheep tied to a lampost in wales? a recreation centre Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rightsidedrive Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 new zealander jokes are directed towards sheep? damn thats weird. but cool though, i mean, thats australia, right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goonstock Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 q. what do you call a deer with no eyes? a. no eye deer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rightsidedrive Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 lol you know what i meant lol yeah, sorry its the jagermeister. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest placidburp Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeremymacgregor87 Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 What do 7 out of 8 people enjoy? gang rape Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
perunamuusi Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 a man goes into a bar. something happens, the outcome of which is hilarious Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 i went to the zoo yesterday. it only had one animal. a dog. it was a shitzu. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 what did the queen bee say to the naughty worker bee... bee-hive! two bumble bees are sitting on a daisy. one bee turns to the other and says. i am absolutely sick of honey. the other bee replies... sick of honey? you have got to bee pollen my leg! what does mr. bumble bee shout on arrival home from a busy day at the flower patch... hive honey, i'm home! what has yellow and back stripes and buzzes around? a wasp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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