Root5 Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 I'm supposed to make people laugh with a single joke at this dinner thing I'm going to. Any suggestions? Jokes must be reasonably kid friendly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Shit Attack Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 whats brown and sticky ? A STICK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
essines Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 Root5 asks an internet forum for an halpful joke Fuck him! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ivan Ooze Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 Abbath and Varg were sitting in bath Abbath farted and Varg was flat Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Pennywise Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 pick a girl at the dinner and do this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-rgbYzyXJyE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YEK Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 2 peanuts were walking down the road, one was a-salted.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest RadarJammer Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 what do you get when you cross Luke Perry and a wheel barrow? worthless garbage, take it into the backyard and burn it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 *insert bad Lou Reed joke* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eugene Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 *insert bad Lou Reed joke* Why did Lou Reed die in the age of 72 ? Probably because of heavy drug usage in the past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 *insert bad Lou Reed joke* Why did Lou Reed die in the age of 72 ? Probably because of heavy drug usage in the past. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Shit Attack Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 whats brown and sticky and in the news at the moment ? lou reed holding a stick !!!! sorry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Atom Dowry Firth Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 That man's hat is rather grimy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YEK Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 That man's hat is rather grimy he doesn't give a fuck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadameChaos Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 why didn't the sanitary towel like the tampon? because they were a stuck up cunt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Atom Dowry Firth Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 Mahatma Gandhi was a peculiar person. He walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that his feet became quite thick and hard. He often went on hunger strikes, and even when he wasn't on a hunger strike, he did not eat much and became quite thin and frail. He also was a very spiritual person. Finally, because he didn't eat much and when he did his diet was peculiar, he developed very bad breath. He became known as a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadameChaos Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 you what sorry? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Friendly Foil Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 *Knock knock* Who's there? The police, your wife's been found dead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeyemusik Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 I guess, because of WATMM, the part about child friendly was missed. How about this one.... Did you hear about the lonely prisoner? He was in his cell. (n.b. - may require provincial accent) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Atom Dowry Firth Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 you what sorry? I had to trawl through some really terrible jokes to find that gem! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcbpete Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 I liked it man - went on a winding tale of mysterious things before coming together ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackdust Posted October 27, 2013 Share Posted October 27, 2013 "Did you hear about the new Aphex Twin Album coming out in December?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leon Sumbitches Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 ... ... ... ... ... THE ARISTOCRATS! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calx Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 After my prostate exam, the doctor left. Then the nurse came. At that point, she whispered the 5 words no man wants to hear: "Who the fuck was that?" ... I walked into my dads bedroom and under the bed I saw a suitcase half open. My curiosity got the better of me so I opened the case in it was a leather mask, a leather cape, crutchless leather shorts and a leather whip..... I couldn't fkin believe it....my dad. . . . . . .a super hero!!! ... Try this puzzle This maths sequence can predict your favorite film...mine was Star Wars. Not sure how it works but it does!! Pick a number between 1-9 Multiply by 3 Add 3 to that number Multiply again by 3 Add the two digits together 3. Oliver Twist 4. Star Wars 5. Forrest Gump 6. Saving Private Ryan 7. Jaws 8. Grease 9. The Joy of Anal Sex with Male Goats and Leather-clad, Oiled-up Lady Boys. 10.Mary Poppins ... They may need tweaking slightly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cryptowen Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 find the nearest small child, kneel down in front of them, look them in the eye, hold their shoulders, then crap your pants & start screaming. don't stop doing either of these things until you pass out or you see colon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 28, 2013 Share Posted October 28, 2013 What do you call a donkey with wings?A Pegusass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.