zaphod
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Everything posted by zaphod
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wut? the last jedi or the force awakens? last jedi made half that domestically. they'll be lucky if it makes 100 million in china, and will probably end the run with 1.5-1.6 billion. that is not the highest grossing movie ever.
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what if your phone had aids?
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song to song two hours of : wide angle shot of ryan gosling *whispering* did i know you then? *whispering* mozart piano concerto plays over fish eye lens shot of michael fassbender standing with his back to rooney mara *voice over of some shit from ecclesiastes* 70mm imax shot of austin hipsters being embarrassing
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traded a bunch of crypto over the summer and now i'm trying to do taxes for it. because each trade is considered a taxable event i'm going to have to calculate capital gains on nearly five hundred trades on multiple exchanges, one of them in china, which i think generates its own form for foreign assets. this is a nightmare, don't ever buy bitcoin it's all lies.
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so luke is a pedophile in this right? and he's running an epstein style island where galactic senators can go and "use the force" on young padawans. which explains why ben solo turns into a raven haired lunatic with his knights of ren aka corey feldman and his angels. yoda is david geffen. i see what they're doing here. i'm going to get to the bottom of this.
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wait....woah
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I pissed on a girls cat once. Thought it was a toilet.
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it’s one of the better docs I’ve seen. Manages to be both prescient and pretty terrifying. so many layers to the story that it almost doesn’t seem real. It is like a tea party version of the shining, although that’s actually understating it’s power.
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a gray state is really interesting. so much to unpack.
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they're just stealing money from the lowest income brackets at this point. drag these people into the street and execute them. i'd pay to see paul ryan decapitated. metaphorically speaking of course.
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welp the newest ios update just bricked my fucking iphone se. it won't hold a charge anymore and is slow as shit to do anything. thanks apple! will get a pixel 2 instead of using these shit phones anymore. between this and high sierra basically making my macbook pro unuseable i'm done with this company.
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what the fuck is this open mouth exuberant psychotic looking smile that white guys with receding hairlines and patchy beards and black frame glasses do in literally every fucking photo they take?
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9xnpLQRs5g
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why did yoda act so insane? can force ghosts get dementia?
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lol
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damn that's sad
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there were so many moments of sheer embarrassment for me. all the strong females nobly sacrificing themselves for the light. the completely tonedeaf way each scene played out, from the little twenty minute cartoon casino planet sequence that seemed like some kind of psa about animal cruelty and human trafficking in like qatar or somewhere to the yoda scene which might as well have ended with the "the more you know" logo displayed above the burning tree. the porgs sort of ironic presence, like disney is saying "had to do it, back on my bullshit" by inserting them into every scene but also sort of winking at the audience like "look how dumb merchandising is now buy these things". the leia in space scene was monumentally bad, one of the cringiest things i've ever seen in a movie. i'm sure all the rubes will write on twitter about how moved they were and how amazing the female characters are and how empowered they feel by the children's movie but disney got one over on you and they're laughing all the way to the bank with this garbage.
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is flax seed oil good for seasoning cast iron?
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even with my extremely low expectations this was terrible. the whole planet dubai/space camels sequence was a giant wtf. just a gigantic clusterfuck of a movie.
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so i guess the sweet moment that lady is talking about in the tweet is when the asian girl at the beginning of the movie blows herself up? or is it when the asian girl at the end flies a ship into someone? really says all i need to know about disney that the asians in this movie both act like kamikaze pilots. representation matters!
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aliens, except the bug hunt is where the colonial marines all try to get aids. at the end a really tall guy in drag cuts bishop in half with his dick and bishop's got cum for blood. just spitballing here.
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this reality is the most on the nose dystopian novel ever written
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJazytih9UE
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who the fuck are these people? oh good because that's what movies are now unbelievably deluded to think any movie made after 2007 will be remembered by anyone "generations" from now
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this cunt had this inscription on his gun: just burn this country to the ground, time to start over
