kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 i was with you until you brought up the usual anti american bullshit. Ok, having just called people spastics for basing their self worth on their watmm profile, I'm going to do the unthinkable and make a thread that a) includes my username in the title b) is self justification c)attempts to deconstruct elements of an online persona. I'm an idiot. My avatar. My avatar is 'Jimmy Nail', not Hitler. I'm from Newcastle, in the NE of England. The North East has quite a proud history and strong idendity. Being pretty much the only beacon of light in western europe in the dark ages due to its monasteries, arguably the birthplace of English lit., the Danelaw, the Durahm bishopric largely independent from the English crown until the 16th century, key player in the industrial revolution. The NE accent is closer to the original Anglo-saxon than any other, and there is a distinct dialect with heavy scandinavian influences. Durham Cathedral has been voted the most beautiful building in Europe, Grey Street in Newcastle the most beautiful street in the UK. England don't win world cups, or world wars, without Geordie miners and their sons in the team. But due to inter and post war industrial decline, it became an absolute shithole. The word 'chav' comes from the Geordie/Gypsie word charver, and the NE is where the cliche originated. Because it was true. Being a Geordie once left you open to ridicule and class prejudice. However since the late eighties Newcastle has largely managed to reinvent itself, and is now (rightfully) considered one of the best places to live in the UK. I don't know anybody who has spent any time there not to endorse it. Although still subject to gentle mocking, a Geordie accent is now generally perceived as indicating honesty and decency, rather than stupidity. Jimmy Nail came to prominence in the 80s series 'Auf Wiedersehen Pet', a comedy about Geordie bricklayers escaping mass unemployment on Tyneside by working in Germany. He'd had no previous experience as an actor, other than as an extra in Get Carter, came from a rough area of Newcastle, and there was little distinction between his character 'Oz' and Jimmy himself. However, the series, and in particular 'Oz', came to epitomise various social political economic trends of the 80s. He was , "a loud, belligerent, abrasive, drunken Geordie lout who showed no fidelity towards his wife or concern for his son. He had a xenophobic attitude to Germans, and later to Turks and Spaniards. His major passions in life were drinking and supporting Newcastle United." Nothing much was expected of Jimmy after the series ended. But in the 90s he managed to reinvent himself as an actor/producer and singer, selling millions of albums in the UK in the process. If you're not British, you might have come across him as Agustín Magaldi in Evita. Along with Newcastle United's return to the premiership, he came to epitomise the rejuvenation of the NE. Were either even taken seriously? No, not really. Being a Geordie I chose an awful 80's promo shot of Jimmy as an avatar. He seemed apt. Later vik added an mspaint hitler moustache. IRL I once used it as a Christmas card for a Jewish friend, with the motto 'At this time of forgiveness, rememeber it was those fucking Jews who murdered Jesus'. He loved it, and as far as I know it's still on his mantlepiece 5 years later. But then, he got the joke. My 'anti-americanism' A feature of watmm over the years has been the interplay between the Americans and Europeans. At least, that has been my perception. About 5 years ago, after no doubt another heated thread about Iraq/Bush/whatever, I posted a joke thread in ironic response, containing this: A map showing the supposed areas of the world that had truly made contributions to electronic music. Despite it containing Jean Michel Jarre's House and 'boffins live here', a large number of the americans misinterpreted, took offense, and I was subject to a torrent of abuse. My own little meme was born. Some people got it, some thought I was a twat, some got it and still thought I was a twat. So my posting of an Abu Ghraib picture etc. in the LTM thread was me re-adopting Jimmy, after having posted my genuine disgust and signing off as Rowan, rather than an attempt at incitement. So more unfunny smart-arse than racist. Am I anti-American? - No, as explained in other threads, I'm probably as mid atlantic as anyone on here. Do I hate Flahbulb/Tycho/Vsnares because theyre American, or thereaboots? - No, I dislike them because they're pastiche. Do I take offense at the idea of an LTM forum? - Yes absolutely, it's absurd and infantile. Do I think Fred McGriff is a cunt? - watmm's holy cow? Of course not. But I'm totally confused as to why some people on a forum dedicated to 'outsider' music, containing some genuinely interesting discussions on 'outsider' art, would want to form some secret clique? Anyway this thread is about me, not LTM. tl/dr, but I got my ten dollars worth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest blicero Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest analogue wings Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 tl:dr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mosca Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 i've had a drink with you on a boat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chim Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 I'd have a drink with you on a boat thanks for being sincere Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mosca Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 who? me or kakapo? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chim Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 kakapo originally, but you can come along as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SR4 Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 i always found the whole anti-English anti American thing to be frustrating because both sides never know when the other is fucking around or legitimately serious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Author Share Posted September 10, 2009 i've had a drink with you on a boat. Yes, on a German Psytrance fishing boat moored on the Tyne after autechre played. Try and explain this to those fucking yanks, and they wouldn't believe you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest analogue wings Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 I suggest you name yourself after an American bird and keep New Zealand out of this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehauntingsoul Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 whatever hitler Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Author Share Posted September 10, 2009 I suggest you name yourself after an American bird and keep New Zealand out of this kakapos have trouble adapting to the modern world and breed once every ten years. Is there an American equivalent? Probably some fat pizza eating bird that illegally invades countries in pursuit of oil, killing tens of thousand of innocent children in the process. Idendity is a tricky thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 way to pander to lazy illiterate americans by making cliffs notes--you think i cant sniff that dig, nigga? i'm all over you like shit on dick Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blir Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 i always found the whole anti-English anti American thing to be frustrating because both sides never know when the other is fucking around or legitimately serious. Same. I just ignore it as sarcasm is difficult to get across on the web. Unless the statement is too absurd to be taken seriously of course. Kakapo, I love you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idrn Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 i don't really get this thread but i've always enjoyed your presence, u daft cunt. did i ever mention my friend is a geordie rapper? he's quite good. i always found the whole anti-English anti American thing to be frustrating because both sides never know when the other is fucking around or legitimately serious. absolutely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Yegg Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 I always thought your name was a weird portmanteau of kaka and kapo, poop and concentration camp foreman, because nothing about you makes me think of cute fat green birds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest analogue wings Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 kakapos have trouble adapting to the modern world and breed once every ten years. Is there an American equivalent? Probably some fat pizza eating bird that illegally invades countries in pursuit of oil, killing tens of thousand of innocent children in the process. The American Kakapo has trouble adapting to the secular world and breeds once every ten minutes. Plus everything else you said. Idendity is a tricky thing. What, spelling it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Author Share Posted September 10, 2009 i don't really get this thread but i've always enjoyed your presence, u daft cunt. did i ever mention my friend is a geordie rapper? he's quite good. I'd laboured under the impression that my avatar, in combination with posts in the style of, "you americans will never really understand the aphex twins unless you've been roofied and bumraped at a Cornish beach rave in 1993 while listening to Heliosphan" would mean that any anti-american posts would be taken with a certain pinch of salt. Recently though some people have taken genuine offense, such as Mcgriff and zaphod today, two posters I respect, so I felt some sense of self-justification was in order. And perhaps it was undermining more genuine posts. And any excuse for my Geordie nation diatribe. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Author Share Posted September 10, 2009 I always thought your name was a weird portmanteau of kaka and kapo, poop and concentration camp foreman, because nothing about you makes me think of cute fat green birds. Yeah, that might be the case if it wasn't for the fact that my grandfather died at Belsen. He fell out of a machine gun tower. Fifth appearance on watmm now for that one. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 Do you prefer AC/DC after the death of Bon Scott? Or do I have to read your unabridged thread? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Author Share Posted September 10, 2009 kakapos have trouble adapting to the modern world and breed once every ten years. Is there an American equivalent? Probably some fat pizza eating bird that illegally invades countries in pursuit of oil, killing tens of thousand of innocent children in the process. The American Kakapo has trouble adapting to the secular world and breeds once every ten minutes. Plus everything else you said. Idendity is a tricky thing. What, spelling it? I'd blame the gin, but I made that error in my first post as well when I was sober. If I really wanted to ridicule myself, I'd reveal my darkest watmm secret. I came to watmm originally because of a Skytree track. My first ever post praised his music and addressed him personally. He ignored me. I was disheartened but stuck with watmm. Of course 3 years later I was telling him his music was hippy shite and suggesting he'd raped his girlfriend in her sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Author Share Posted September 10, 2009 Do you prefer AC/DC after the death of Bon Scott? Or do I have to read your unabridged thread? You see, the musical idendddttttity of the NE is also tricky thing, especially when you look over the pennines to Manchester and Liverpool, or over the border. But I'm not going to claim Brian Johnson for my allstars. AntnDec Bryan Ferry Andy Taylor Neil Tennant And I know it's a risk without Hoddle in tow, but I'm going for the wildcard Chris Waddle. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1KEMMfV5-Qg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
perunamuusi Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 i've always had a deep rooted resentment towards geordies based pretty much entirely on the childhood trauma of having to listen to the theme from "when the boat comes in" in the late 70s. Apparently it used to incite "rage" in me though i only remember feeling nauseous whenever it started. Also, i have never really been able to look at Rodney Bewes and I don't think he was even in it. Pretty sure Bolam was though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kakapo Posted September 10, 2009 Author Share Posted September 10, 2009 I'm with you on the Rodney Bewes thing. How could someone's face lack such aesthetic basics? It's an affront to humanity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Franklin Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 I love the city of newcastle. One of my favs when I was traveling through the UK and Europe bunch of years ago. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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