jules Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 my favorite is when I have silent potent bombs. I'll be laying in bed watching tv with the wife when I get a rumble and know how bad it's going to be. I absolutely love the 3 or 4 seconds in between when it comes out and when it reaches the wife's nose. it's almost impossible for me to not piss myself laughing but I have a decent poker face. my wife will be talking about the show we are watching not having a clue about the rotten stink wall approaching her open mouth. she will then make a horrid face like she actually tasted it and proceed to hit me and get very angry. these are my favorite farts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Npoess Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest rumbo Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I enjoy the tonal variations, particularly the ones that sound like Scooby Doo saying "I don't know". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Blanket Fort Collapse Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 My favorite farts are after 2 days of malt liqour & junk food on a road trip. Rip em out so bad in a car of 5 people all the windows are rolled down and it still smells so fucking horrible that everyone can't help but laugh hysterically at how disgusting it is. It's really surprising that people put up with how bad my farts are in those circumstances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Iain C Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I had a falafel pitta with plenty of onion for breakfast this morning, and right now I'm doing some horribly noxious nose-scorchers. You know those farts where a teaspoon's measure of gas expands and fills the whole room with the odour of burning rotten onions? I've got those. And I'm loving it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thehauntingsoul Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 lol, I like when I get so gassy that I'll get these seemingly never-ending continuous streams of air out of my ass. Usually this happens after tons of beer and junk food but it's so satisfying. Like almost as much so as taking a shit but you can just go to town in your pants without having to head to the toilet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chim Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I love all my gaseous children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blir Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I love all my gaseous children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soloman Tump Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 After ive drunk about 8 pints of cider, something rotten happens to my guts. I have cleared a 3m radius in a club before. Some may see this as a benefit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaini Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I love all my gaseous children. every time i look at that av i think of jamie hyneman from mythbusters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Iain C Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I had a falafel pitta with plenty of onion for breakfast this morning, and right now I'm doing some horribly noxious nose-scorchers. You know those farts where a teaspoon's measure of gas expands and fills the whole room with the odour of burning rotten onions? I've got those. And I'm loving it. Some 3 and a half hours after breakfast, I'm still releasing concentrated parcels of pure stank - except that now, they've taken on a distinct overtone of greasy old Bernard Matthews Turkey Drummers. Possibly ones that have fallen behind the fridge and remained there for several weeks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marf Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 my last girls vag smelled like cinnamon and cheese. strange combo. Not complaining though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blir Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I love all my gaseous children. every time i look at that av i think of jamie hyneman from mythbusters. Aaaaaand now I'm imagining Jamie with Zoidbergs voice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest rumbo Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 carbs = farts. One summer morning I bought around a kilo of grapes and pretty much ate the whole lot in a day. The subsequent fermentation in my gut produced the most ungodly stench. I can't even explain it. It was beyond the label of fart. If you were to walk into the bedroom in The Excorcist, this is what you would smell. From the bowels of the devil. Pure evil. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jules Posted April 26, 2011 Author Share Posted April 26, 2011 wet shower farts can be very enjoyable Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucas Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I like the interesting sounding ones. Pitch bend, distortion, resonance. Also the smell doesn't really please me unless it's mine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Iain C Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I had a falafel pitta with plenty of onion for breakfast this morning, and right now I'm doing some horribly noxious nose-scorchers. You know those farts where a teaspoon's measure of gas expands and fills the whole room with the odour of burning rotten onions? I've got those. And I'm loving it. Some 3 and a half hours after breakfast, I'm still releasing concentrated parcels of pure stank - except that now, they've taken on a distinct overtone of greasy old Bernard Matthews Turkey Drummers. Possibly ones that have fallen behind the fridge and remained there for several weeks. Well, I foolishly had falafel again for lunch - and the guffs are still coming thick and fast. I haven't checked, but I suspect the inside of my kecks are coated with an oily, brownish film. And I think I might have given myself 'roids. I'll report back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Iain C Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I had a falafel pitta with plenty of onion for breakfast this morning, and right now I'm doing some horribly noxious nose-scorchers. You know those farts where a teaspoon's measure of gas expands and fills the whole room with the odour of burning rotten onions? I've got those. And I'm loving it. Some 3 and a half hours after breakfast, I'm still releasing concentrated parcels of pure stank - except that now, they've taken on a distinct overtone of greasy old Bernard Matthews Turkey Drummers. Possibly ones that have fallen behind the fridge and remained there for several weeks. Well, I foolishly had falafel again for lunch - and the guffs are still coming thick and fast. I haven't checked, but I suspect the inside of my kecks are coated with an oily, brownish film. And I think I might have given myself 'roids. I'll report back. Just to let everybody know, I've had a couple of really painful ring-stinging craps, and now my farts smell like peanuts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Pig Trotter farts are pretty cool. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rambo Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Heart transplant farts. When you are receiving or performing a heart transplant and you let one go. Silent but violent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jules Posted April 26, 2011 Author Share Posted April 26, 2011 fhearts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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