caze

I thought the new one was much better, a bit of a departure to the books, but didn't think the english one was very funny. New one isn't actually all that great either, but did manage to find some humour in the crazy situations.

That's for feeding 6 on Christmas, and basically the same dinner again the following day (minus the sprouts probably, because I don't have a blender in my folks gaff, and so will have to shred them by hand, which is a pain in the arse, not doing that twice - boiled sprouts are really terrible btw, but with this method they're delicious). Plus there'll be turkey meat and ham left over for sandwiches for a few days more.

Here's my Christmas dinner recipe, have cobbled together from various places over the years, adding my own little tweaks here and there. It's served with roast spuds (cut into small-medium sized pieces (e.g. four for a large potato, cut as irregularly as possible, the more edges the better), par boil with 2 tsp salt for 5-10 mins until outer flesh starts to soften, shake about in the pan to crumble the spuds up, heat a load of goose or duck fat in the roasting tray, add 2 sprigs of chopped rosemary and a handful of crushed garlic cloves when the oil has heated up, then mix in the spuds), and roasted carrots/parsnips/sweet potatoes (chopped into strips and mixed with 2 tbsp red wine vinegar, salt + pepper before hand, then glazed with honey about 10-15 mins before they're finished cooking). Christmas Gravy pt. 1 Ingredients · 2 Celery Sticks, roughly chopped · 2 Red Onions, quartered · 1 Bulb Garlic, smashed · 2 Carrots, roughly chopped · 5 Bay Leaves · 5 Sage Leaves · 4 Sprigs Rosemary · 2 Star Anise · 2 Rashers of Smoked Bacon · Peel of 1 Clementine, and 1 Lemon · 8 Chicken Wings · 30ml Olive Oil Method · Preheat oven to 200c. Put veg, herbs and star anise into a sturdy bottomed roasting tray. Scatter over the bacon. Break the chicken wings open, then put them on a board and bash them with a rolling pin; this will release more flavour. Put them in the pan, drizzle with olive oil, sprinkle over a few pinches of salt and pepper then toss it all and put the tray in the oven to cook for 1 hour, or till the meat is tender and falling off the bone. · Take the pan out of the oven, put it on a hob over a low heat and use a potato masher to really grind everything up. Keep mashing and scraping all the goodness from the bottom of the pan. The longer you let everything fry, the darker your gravy will be. Pour in 2 litres of hot water, turn the heat up and bring to the boil for 10 minutes, then turn down the heat and simmer for about 25 minutes, stirring occasionally. · When it’s reached the consistency you want, check the seasoning, and then strain it through a sieve into a bowl. Really push everything down to get all the flavour. Discard anything left behind. Once it’s cooled to room temperature put it into containers or freezer bags and pop it in your freezer. You’ll finish it off on Christmas day. Gravy pt. 2 Ingredients · Turkey giblets · 1 Onion, diced · 1 Carrot, diced · 2 Bay Leaves · 4 Sage Leaves · 1 Sprig Rosemary Method · Fry the onion and carrot in a small amount of olive oil for 5 mins. Cut into neck in several places and bash, to release flavour while cooking, fry for 2-3 mins until browned, add remaining giblets and fry for a few more minutes. · Add herbs and 1 litre of boiling water, bring to boil and then simmer for 1 hour, let the liquid reduce by half, but top up with water if the level gets below this. · Cool down and refrigerate/freeze until Christmas day. Turkey Ingredients · 250g Unsalted Butter · 75g dried cranberries, finely chopped · 4 sprigs Rosemary, leaves picked · 2 sprigs Thyme, leaves picked · 8-10 Sage leaves · 1 Lemon · 1 Clementine · 18-20lb (8-9kg) Turkey · 2 Clementines · 2 Bay Leaves · 2 Sprigs Rosemary · 2 Sprigs Thyme Method · Put the butter into a bowl and add the chopped cranberries. Chop, sweep and run your knife through the herb leaves until really finely chopped then add to the butter with a pinch of salt and pepper, and the finely grated zest of your clementine and lemon. Mix so the butter softens and everything is combined. Divide the butter roughly in half. · Get your turkey and use a spoon to work your way between the skin and the meat. Start at the side of the cavity just above the leg and work gently up towards the breastbone and towards the back so you create a large cavity. Pick up half of your butter and push it into the cavity you've created. Use your hands to push it through the skin right to the back so it coats the breast meat as evenly as possible. Do the same on the other side then rub any leftover butter all over the outside of the bird to use it up. If you've got any herb stalks left over, put them in the cavity of the turkey for added flavour as it cooks. Cover the turkey in cling film and keep in the fridge until you need it. · Take your turkey out of the fridge a few hours before you are ready to put it in the oven so it has time to come up to room temperature. That flavoured butter will already be under the skin so you'll only need a few tweaks to finish it off. Halve 2 to 4 clementines and pop them in the cavity with a few more sprigs of fresh herbs like rosemary, bay and thyme. The fruit will steam and flavour the birds in a really lovely way. Take a sprig of fresh rosemary, pull off the leaves at the bottom then spear that through the loose skin around the cavity to hold it together and keep it from shrinking back as the turkey cooks. · Preheat your oven to full whack. Put the bird in the roasting tray, cover with foil. As soon as it goes in the oven, immediately turn the heat down to 180ºC. · As a rough guide, you want to cook the turkey for about 35 to 40 minutes per kilogram, so a 7kg turkey will want about 4 to 4½ hours in the oven. But there are so many variables such as the sort of oven you have and the quality of your bird. Check on your turkey every 30 minutes or so and keep it from drying out by basting it with the lovely juices from the bottom of the pan. After 3½ hours, remove the foil so the skin gets golden and crispy. If you are at all worried just stick a meat thermometer in the thickest part of the breast. When the internal temperature has reached 65ºC for a good quality bird, and about 82ºC for a cheaper bird, it's ready to come out. · Carefully put a metal skewer in the cavity and use it to lift the bird and angle it over the roasting tray so all the juices from the cavity run out. Move the turkey to a platter then cover it with a double layer of tinfoil and 2 tea towels to keep it warm while it rests for at least 30 minutes. Reserve all the cooking juices, but separate out most of the fat (the fat can be used when making the stuffing). Stuffing Ingredients · Breadcrumbs · 1 large Red Onion · 12 Sage leaves · Large handful of flat leafed parsley · 4-5 sprigs of Thyme · Zest of 1 lemon and 1 clementine · Half a nutmeg, grated · Olive Oil / Turkey Fat Method · Finely chop the onion and the sage and other herbs. Fry the onion for 5 mins on a high heat until it starts to brown, add the herbs and fry for another minute or two. · Combine the onions with the breadcrumbs, citrus zest, and nutmeg in a large bowl. Season with salt and pepper. · After the turkey has finished cooking, combine the mixture with enough olive oil and turkey fat to make a moist crumb that sticks together in clumps, cook for 15 mins in a shallow baking dish covered in foil, uncover for the final 10 mins, mixing around once or twice so everything gets nice and crispy. Gravy pt. 3 Ingredients · 500ml Gravy pt. 1 · 250ml Gravy pt. 2 · ½ Juices from cooked Turkey, with most of the fat removed. · 2 tbsp. Cranberry Sauce · 2 tbsp. Flour · 75g Unsalted Butter Method · Melt the butter in a pot at a high heat, and fry the flour, reducing the heat to low, stirring constantly to prevent from burning, keep cooking until the roux starts to turn a deep brown (may take up to 15-20 mins, this can be done the night before and set aside, can double or quadruple the amounts and reserve for the following night's gravy as well if needed). · Add the two gravy stocks and turkey juices (half of what was prepared earlier) and bring to the boil, stirring to remove any lumps. Add the cranberry sauce and simmer for 10-15 mins, stirring regularly. · Strain gravy and keep on a very low heat until ready to serve. Brussels Sprouts Ingredients · 500g Brussels Sprouts · Olive Oil · Large knob of Unsalted Butter · 4 Smoked, Streaky Bacon Rashers, Finely Sliced · 2 Sage Sprigs, leaves picked · 2 tbsp. Worcestershire Sauce · 2 garlic cloves, finely grated Method · Push the sprouts through the fine slicing attachment of a food processor, then fill the bowl with water. · Add a good drizzle of olive oil and the butter to a large pan over a medium heat. Add the bacon, sage and a pinch of salt and pepper and cook for 5-10 minutes, or until lovely and crisp. · Drain the sprouts, add to the pan and turn the heat up – it doesn’t matter if they’re still a bit wet, that will help them steam. Fry for 10 minutes or till soft. Add a splash of water if needed. · Add the Worcestershire sauce, toss it all together then turn the heat off. Add the garlic – you really want that hum of raw garlic – then give it another good stir and serve straight away. Ham Ingredients · 1 boneless gammon joint (non-smoked, overpowers the spices), about 2kg · 3 tbsp molasses or black treacle · 1 tsp cloves · Pinch of mace · 1 bay leaf · 1 tsp allspice berries · 1 tbsp black peppercorns · Peel of ½ an orange, cut into thin strips · Handful of cloves For the glaze: · 5 tbsp dark brown sugar, plus extra to sprinkle · 1½ tbsp mustard powder · Finely grated zest of ½ orange · 20ml ginger wine Method · Put the ham in a large stock pot, and cover with cold water. Add the molasses, spices and orange peel and bring slowly to a simmer, skimming off any scum. Simmer very gently for about an hour and a half, until the internal temperature of the ham reaches 68C. · Heat the oven to 220C. Lift the ham out of the liquid, allow to cool slightly, then carefully cut off the skin, leaving as much fat beneath as possible. Score this in a diamond pattern, and stud the intersections with cloves. Put the ham in a foil-lined roasting tray. · Mix together the glaze ingredients into a thick paste, and brush this all over the fat. Put into the hot oven for about 25 minutes, basting twice during this time, and adding a sprinkle more sugar as you go, until the glaze is caramelised and bubbling. Allow to cool completely before serving.

Asafoetida is usually added as a replacement for onion and/or garlic, so not sure there's much point adding that in (most people probably don't have it in their cupboard anyway). Also I wouldn't blitz the onions like that, you'll release a lot more of their sulfur that way adding a lot of bitterness to the dish (better to finely chop, more sulfur compounds stay in the onion bits and when they get fried they get neutralized far quicker). 1 tbsp salt seems a bit much as well, I usually put 1/2 tsp in when cooking then check for seasoning at the very end. otherwise looks very nice. It's a good base dish to have in your arsenal, can throw anything you want in, veg or meat, try different types of lentils as well.

what's her deal, is she like most ex-Scientologists in that she still thinks L Ron was actually on to something, and it's just a corrupted organisation now, or has she shaken off all the crazy? I remember she was on some network news interview (or maybe 'twas the BBC one) many years ago with various other Scientologists being all offended at everyone calling them on their bullshit.

coincidentally I just started reading Count Zero last week, seems ok so far. I just finished this the other day, was terrible in the end, took me ages to read because it was so dull. nothing happens until the last few pages, and even then nothing particularly exciting happens. reading the third one now just to get it over with.

lol

wow, what a lovely tune.

Gosling is such a terrible actor, looks like he's doing his dumb-smirk-face-throughout-the-entire-movie deal on this. Still looks kind of good though.

it looks like everything that Brit Marling is in is terrible, like those two pseudo science fiction films I Origins and Another Earth, will give it a miss.

vocoded red dwarf! ha, never noticed that. that theme tune is a big nod to joe meek, very similar to bits from telstar and red rocket.

+1 on the lovely larry-colours

lemsip + whiskey

https://youtu.be/l1qcUEQaDDo?t=38

AI will definitely being housing itself in hot female bodies prior to judgement day to help with getting the better of the dumb men (i.e. all of them).

pineapple express is great. alien is great. good combo.

have his final book in my amazon wishlist, so should have it after christmas.

bad santa was on the telly there, good shit.

yup. all sci fi requires at least some suspension of disbelief, and westworld isn't even an example of a thing that requires a particularly large amount of it, aside from the basic premise of artificial intelligence.

Are you aware that New York is not the same place as Georgia or Mississippi?

well that was great.