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It is kind of crazy that I've been on watmm for like my whole adolescence. I joined while I was in 8th grade. These cards pretty accurately represent the various phases of obsession and eccentricity that I've gone through during the last 4 years. Media has shaped my life. Every 'turning point' can be attributed to a piece of music, lyrics, video, book, or drug experience interpreted through lots of reading stuff on the internet. My path toward idm and weirdness is pretty similar to a lot of other people's paths. I've gone on the millenial "middle class white male discovering how much more there is to life thru the veil of materialistic American culture" journey.

 

8th grade: had lived in urban Lancaster PA for 6 years. discovered Tool and life changed. Became obsessed with researching everything I could about psychoactive drugs. Had the whole psychonaut ideal in mind. Tried DXM and dyphenhydramine and morning glory seeds. Watched salad fingers and Milkman and was introduced to BoC and AFX. Fell in love.

 

9th grade: moved to Alaska. became total stoner. Made "my head is a baobab" thread. was obsessed with BoC and then I listened to Confield, became AEcolyte. Got depressed over winter and stopped smoking due to dysphoria. Second semester became really homesick for PA. Smoked salvia during the spring which coincided with a lift in spirits, and the idea of creating a society out in the woods was born in talks with comrade Eno.

summer: went back to PA and stayed w/ best friend for a month. was awesome, was total king of the city. came back to AK in the morning of 1st day of school.

 

10th grade: became kind of isolated. all drug experimentation fizzled out and the drive was replaced by an obsession with ancient architecture and out-of-place artifacts. started awesome future-space apocalyptic terraformed solar system RPG setting w/ Eno. The bizarre facebook identity "pet'ctlyptem xon yi'haaqti wchwaaxaan" was born. Randomly discovered "The Archaic Revival" by terence mckenna in library, changed life.

Summer: T.Mckenna influenced plans w/ Eno to create temple out in woods, ventured out, had solitary DXM trip out at haven, met a 'nymph'. Made "haven" thread. due to disorganization, Haven never really got completed past some pallets and a tent. While on trip to Germany w/ family came up w/ idea that all sacred architecture is based on form constants embedded in genetic memory a la 'stoned ape theory.'

 

11th grade: 'haven' had failed, utopian ideas were dead. became isolated again, this time became really eccentric and kept elevating myself to manic euphoric mindstates whilst wandering around at night listening to music that I made. trolled lots of people on facebook. Formed a relationship with a girl I randomly messaged over facebook. over break went to east coast and visited Grandparents in upstate New York. got a Yellow Magic Orchestra cd and became interested in early synthpop. on plane home, "The Octopus Lounge" was born. I made the "LISTEN TO THIS HOLY SANCTIMONIOUS PIECE OF MUSIC" thread, which characterized my extremely silly mindset around that time. Lost virginity really slowly bc gf was scared of breaking her hymen. Eased into sex becoming mutually comfortable w/ eachother's bodies. The spirit of the haven was reborn when Eno and I started the TIFF gang. Made "living in dozens of abandoned shacks" thread.

summer: with the TIFFian trifecta went on crazy DXM fueled hike thru burnt down area where 3rd chancellor's family squatted when he was little. all experienced a collective hallucination of a 4th person named "Mike T." was fuckin crazy. Tiff died down during the end of summer.

 

12th grade: first semester spent in unsure, hazy funk, parents pressuring me to go to college, gf in college having emotional issues. get rather dissociated, pessimistic. listen to FlyLo and smoke JWH-108 and drink whiskey often. sometimes play RPG over weekends. 2nd semester, having waited thru my parents losing interest in my future, things get better w/ gf, we work out the kinks. work on RPG alot and also in process of writing massive monumental allegorical movie w/ Eno about life in fairbanks. plans concerning haven/tiff/mikeT have started up again.

summer plans: gonna finally build temple/woods society, gonna work on the movie, gonna finish at least one album, fuck yeah.

 

I don't care about sharing this information freely on the internet because I don't feel bad about any of this. In fact, it seems like a great story to share.

 

almost brought a tear to my eye; great read

feels life has been wasted

edit: my life

 

 

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