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The holy union of bathroomery

impakt

By impakt
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impakt Grand Master

impakt

Posted
Posted

Boot your mp3 player, put some good track on your ears. Sit down on the toilet. Take a shit and a piss as the song climaxes. Next song(s) you take a wank and cum as it climaxes. Now you've got all three outputs in one flush and you feel all emptied out, bliss! :squarepusher_logo:

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Guest Adjective

Guest Adjective

Posted
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batcock photoshop in your earlier thread was done on the toilet during some comedic diarrhea

 

best i've done is take a shit, get high, take a shot, and then jack off to POV porn on the toilet while smoking a clove or pipe. end with a long hot bath with cig, a few more hits from the sprite bottle bong, and a glass of scotch with Three Amigos playing on the laptop, laying on the toilet.

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thehauntingsoul Grand Master

thehauntingsoul

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Boot your mp3 player, put some good track on your ears. Sit down on the toilet. Take a shit and a piss as the song climaxes. Next song(s) you take a wank and cum as it climaxes. Now you've got all three outputs in one flush and you feel all emptied out, bliss! :squarepusher_logo:

 

That sounds pretty good, just blow your nose after for extra bonus points

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Guest abusivegeorge

Guest abusivegeorge

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Getting a boner on the toilet makes me want to shit more, then I have to lose the boner to squeeze the shit out or I have extreme dick pain from muscle pressure where I am contracting my abdomen.

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Guest abusivegeorge

Guest abusivegeorge

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Yeah I get that too, espeically if I need to shit in a public place I'm all like "but what if somebody elses dickend has been rubbing just here too, and what if they have aids" and I freak out in my own head a little bit.

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sneaksta303 Grand Master

sneaksta303

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I have a problem with my dick being so big it has to rub up against the inside of the toilet all the time. Really nasty and filthy.

lol I have this alot too

 

 

psh right. i seen it. looks like an inverted elevator button.

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sneaksta303 Grand Master

sneaksta303

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Thats cuz your mom was right beside us and she is revolting

 

you wouldn't be able to say that to her face.

 

Anyhow, I just had a shit. I had been holding it in for a while, knowing from the feeling in my bowels that it was going to be a rather loose and hot. I hate those shits, as I often times have to use a helluva lot of toilet paper, which I don't like doing for several reasons.

 

So, after the pressure became to much, I excused myself from the conversation I was in, and proceeded to squat properly on the toilet (which is like the kind in germany with the ledge that the poop lands on. i dunno how to explain) and out came a slithery snake, about 2 inches wide, and at least a foot long. Part of me was relieved, as that most likely meant at least a SEMI CLEAN BREAK. No. The first wipe was the worst, as apparently a collection of shit snot had collected around my bung, leaving the toilet paper looking like someone shit sneezed on it. It took 5 more times of wiping and getting the TP wet to properly clean myself. fuck. I feel better now though yay!

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sneaksta303 Grand Master

sneaksta303

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5 wipes is nothing mate, I've probably been up to 45 at the very least with my hairy ass.

 

oh trust me I am not complaining a bit. I should have been more clear. I was expecting much worse from my pre-shit jitters.

 

45 wtf?

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