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Guest Mirezzi

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95 percent of the stuff I see on my [ f] news feed is uninteresting. It's been exactly one month since I posted any status update.

 

WATMM generally has more interesting subject matter. But then again, there's a more specialized community here, as opposed to the general public.

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My gf's mom just spammed my facebook wall with Swedish House Mafia

 

wow. does she listen to Swedish House Mafia, or did she just think "he likes electronic music, he must love this"?

 

It's both, apparently.

I burned her a copy of Tri Rep++ for her birthday about 6 years ago, and she apparently loved it. I don't know how it's come to this.

 

I barely post anything to my own wall anymore, because she'll comment on everything, sometimes angrily (I think she thinks if she sees it in her news feed, it is being actively directed to her by the poster). Por ejemplo, I posted about the new GYBE album before it was released, because I have some old facebook pals who like GYBE. She wrote back (this is what she types like): "AAAND who actually ARE THESE PEOPLE and how am I SUPPOSED TO know them? Are you saying i should CHECK IT OUT? Maybe TOO HOT. I will TRACKK it down tho"

 

I'm just ignoring it since I can't restrict her without causing a Significant Family Event, because facebook is so fucking important to everyone now.

 

edit: and it's totally fine that she wants to share stuff and comment, but it's just a little bit much. There is way more of her on my wall than there is of me on my wall, including her spamming advertisements for her business, so it's a bit useless as a reflection of my own thoughts, interests, likes etc at this point.

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[because facebook is so fucking important to everyone now.

 

It's important for everyone to let everyone else know what they buy, what they eat and drink at every meal, and how happy they are in their relationships. :trap:

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A few weeks ago, this girl I've never seen before sent me a friend request. Since she's from the same uni as me, I accepted thinking she might be a friend of a friend or something. Everyday, several times a day, she posts stupid stuff on facebook about her ex, about love, life and your usual kitten-sleeping-on-a-pillow pics. She never once messaged me or lead me to find out why she added me out of the blue. She is by far the most active individual on my FB news feed, and she always produces the same kind of content. Initially I got annoyed and thought about unfriending or blocking her, but after a while I started thinking of her as a sociological experiment of sorts. There's bound to be something about human nature worth learning there. Something like a cross between shitmydadsays and Portugal's Got Talent.

 

Here's an excerpt of one of today's posts translated:

 

When some people have a totally different concept of what we are, we feel weird! Strangers to these people, and to ourselves to try to imagine the wrong picture they create of us...

 

she sounds like a typical attention whore type... not worth your time or anyone's

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"AAAND who actually ARE THESE PEOPLE and how am I SUPPOSED TO know them? Are you saying i should CHECK IT OUT? Maybe TOO HOT. I will TRACKK it down tho"

 

But she's gonna check it out! She sounds pretty giving, and game. You should totally fuck the shit out of her. Literally. Fuck her until poop comes out of her butt, onto your ball sack, and dribbles down like Hershey's chocolate syrup on a Denny's banana split. "TOO HOTT!"

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A relative of mine posted this recently. Behold the levels of delusion, he was being utterly serious and without any irony or sarcasm intended. On a serious note I think he may actually be a sociopath. The funny thing is his music is the most pedestrian self indulgent crud you've ever heard...

 

"Well after a week of nearly fucking dying I'm feeling quite ready to smash the world open. Is it me or is everyone in music a boring twat with boring tunes. I can't fucking wait to ripp this world a new arse hole. Someone needs to get it going. I've just listened to shit I did before I went to hospital and its class. I'm going to finish that this week.

Do me a favour like this lump it retweet it, whatever the fuck it is that's fashionable today and let people know I'm alive. I'm back and I'm refreshed and there is fuck all anybody can do about it. It's known I'm the prince it's repeated by god like geniuses that I'm the next in line to take over the Union Jack. I've earned my stripes and proved myself.  I'm not scared of no cunt, no challenge and no chart. I do what the fuck I want when I want. I'm going to be king not William or will I fucking am. It works. It's real. I don't play Internet games and count the bastard follower. I write belter tunes then I get the lads on the blower and we make them loud and we smash it up in London Liverpool wherever. Me Scottish Svengali is injecting me with the cash that's needed to penetrate. Not that it matters. I could do this and climb to the highest levels of respect without a penny like I've shown so far. But you know what. I need a private jet. I'm going to Japan. America all over Europe with this shit and this belief they need it as you do. I'm signing to the best label with the coolest cunt in music. Who is even more nuts than me. Ill murder jools holland ill play all your bull shit festivals for all your birds. Ill take your birds off you. Throw them back at you. Ill knock proffesor green right out if he pipes up. Ill tell ed Sheeran to get a fucking wash the mumbling rapping mini acoustic guitar playing boring indie fat knob. Ill tell Liam Gallagher to retire. This is my world. Be happy I'm planning on filling it with good music. Because what your getting is shite. I'm sick of being quiet. Do me a fucking favour. Stay out my way. I'm on a mission. The countdown to lift off has begun. Life is shit. Make it good. Rock and roll is dead. This is me and you should think exactly the same. If not your complying with a big fat wank that some other cunt is having.

Ill rub my own cock. Ill blow my own trumpet. All I need is a microphone a stand a guitar and a mother fucking heart beat.

Be scared. I'm pumping. I'm trained I'm experienced. I'm new. I'm everything you need to be.

Lets just get Christmas out the way first.

You all need to chill out.

Goodnight.

Oh I'm sorry if I don't post fucking photos of my tea or myself doing a marathon or me on a night out. FUCK OFF with that world and mind frame. I refuse to get involved. It makes me sick. I shouldn't even be here. Why am I bothering I don't give a fuck.

Again. Goodnight. Sleep tight. Watching people give up saddens me. I pity them. Me I'm here for the long haul. Try and stop me. Get a gun, point it at me. See if I flinch. It's happened I didn't. I'm untouchable. Get over it. I'm respected more than any gangster or musician in 500 mile radius. You fucking wish you was me you boring twats. Delete your Facebooks and start bands. Start wars. Do something. Go nuts. Just be aware I'm already fucking doing it. NOW FUCK OFF. Having a bevie or a line or a joint or a tablet does not mean your mad. It just means your doing what everyone else does. There is more to life than what's about. You know it. I certainly do. I run mine. Run yours.

Now wouldn't you rather have me be me and say this shit in the NME or T4 or whatever the fuck. Cos I don't see or hear no one who can have it like me.

Watch this fucking space.

 

 Peace."

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"Get a gun, point it at me. See if I flinch. It's happened I didn't. I'm untouchable. Get over it."

 

The Facebook posts are more entertaining than the music, he should release a bumper compilation book of Facebook posts, THAT I'd buy.

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Guest uptown devil

it would be most enjoyable to shoot him in the kneecaps

 

 

edit:

"Nothing like a little hard hitting Skrillex to get ya going in the morning!!"

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Damn Westhead! All that sounds really familiar... Like a former member of our boards.

 

There's this one girl in my FB that always posts about not wanting any drama, but she constantly posts drama of her own.

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I'm not sure people quite understand how cancer works.

 

A True Luv STORY:-

Please Read :(

 

A girl friend gave a challenge 2 her

boy friend 2 live a day without her ,

 

No communication at all & said if he

 

passed it,

she'll luv him 4evr.

D bf agreed & he didn't text n call her d whole day,without knowing dat his gf had only 24 hrs 2 live.

Bcz she was suffering 4m cancer,

he excitedly went 2 her gf's home d nxt day.

Tears fel as she saw his gf laying in a coffin wid a noteon d side

"U DID IT BABY, CAN U DO IT EVERY DAY..?.!!

 

Thumbs up if u like it :'(

 

 

 

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I'm not sure people quite understand how cancer works.

 

A True Luv STORY:-

Please Read :(

 

A girl friend gave a challenge 2 her

boy friend 2 live a day without her ,

 

No communication at all & said if he

 

passed it,

she'll luv him 4evr.

D bf agreed & he didn't text n call her d whole day,without knowing dat his gf had only 24 hrs 2 live.

Bcz she was suffering 4m cancer,

he excitedly went 2 her gf's home d nxt day.

Tears fel as she saw his gf laying in a coffin wid a noteon d side

"U DID IT BABY, CAN U DO IT EVERY DAY..?.!!

 

Thumbs up if u like it :'(

 

 

 

 

holy lol

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A relative of mine posted this recently. Behold the levels of delusion, he was being utterly serious and without any irony or sarcasm intended. On a serious note I think he may actually be a sociopath. The funny thing is his music is the most pedestrian self indulgent crud you've ever heard...

 

"Well after a week of nearly fucking dying I'm feeling quite ready to smash the world open. Is it me or is everyone in music a boring twat with boring tunes. I can't fucking wait to ripp this world a new arse hole. Someone needs to get it going. I've just listened to shit I did before I went to hospital and its class. I'm going to finish that this week.

Do me a favour like this lump it retweet it, whatever the fuck it is that's fashionable today and let people know I'm alive. I'm back and I'm refreshed and there is fuck all anybody can do about it. It's known I'm the prince it's repeated by god like geniuses that I'm the next in line to take over the Union Jack. I've earned my stripes and proved myself. I'm not scared of no cunt, no challenge and no chart. I do what the fuck I want when I want. I'm going to be king not William or will I fucking am. It works. It's real. I don't play Internet games and count the bastard follower. I write belter tunes then I get the lads on the blower and we make them loud and we smash it up in London Liverpool wherever. Me Scottish Svengali is injecting me with the cash that's needed to penetrate. Not that it matters. I could do this and climb to the highest levels of respect without a penny like I've shown so far. But you know what. I need a private jet. I'm going to Japan. America all over Europe with this shit and this belief they need it as you do. I'm signing to the best label with the coolest cunt in music. Who is even more nuts than me. Ill murder jools holland ill play all your bull shit festivals for all your birds. Ill take your birds off you. Throw them back at you. Ill knock proffesor green right out if he pipes up. Ill tell ed Sheeran to get a fucking wash the mumbling rapping mini acoustic guitar playing boring indie fat knob. Ill tell Liam Gallagher to retire. This is my world. Be happy I'm planning on filling it with good music. Because what your getting is shite. I'm sick of being quiet. Do me a fucking favour. Stay out my way. I'm on a mission. The countdown to lift off has begun. Life is shit. Make it good. Rock and roll is dead. This is me and you should think exactly the same. If not your complying with a big fat wank that some other cunt is having.

Ill rub my own cock. Ill blow my own trumpet. All I need is a microphone a stand a guitar and a mother fucking heart beat.

Be scared. I'm pumping. I'm trained I'm experienced. I'm new. I'm everything you need to be.

Lets just get Christmas out the way first.

You all need to chill out.

Goodnight.

Oh I'm sorry if I don't post fucking photos of my tea or myself doing a marathon or me on a night out. FUCK OFF with that world and mind frame. I refuse to get involved. It makes me sick. I shouldn't even be here. Why am I bothering I don't give a fuck.

Again. Goodnight. Sleep tight. Watching people give up saddens me. I pity them. Me I'm here for the long haul. Try and stop me. Get a gun, point it at me. See if I flinch. It's happened I didn't. I'm untouchable. Get over it. I'm respected more than any gangster or musician in 500 mile radius. You fucking wish you was me you boring twats. Delete your Facebooks and start bands. Start wars. Do something. Go nuts. Just be aware I'm already fucking doing it. NOW FUCK OFF. Having a bevie or a line or a joint or a tablet does not mean your mad. It just means your doing what everyone else does. There is more to life than what's about. You know it. I certainly do. I run mine. Run yours.

Now wouldn't you rather have me be me and say this shit in the NME or T4 or whatever the fuck. Cos I don't see or hear no one who can have it like me.

Watch this fucking space.

 

Peace."

 

Does he spit hot fire over IDM beatz?

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I'm not sure people quite understand how cancer works.

 

A True Luv STORY:-

Please Read :(

 

A girl friend gave a challenge 2 her

boy friend 2 live a day without her ,

 

No communication at all & said if he

 

passed it,

she'll luv him 4evr.

D bf agreed & he didn't text n call her d whole day,without knowing dat his gf had only 24 hrs 2 live.

Bcz she was suffering 4m cancer,

he excitedly went 2 her gf's home d nxt day.

Tears fel as she saw his gf laying in a coffin wid a noteon d side

"U DID IT BABY, CAN U DO IT EVERY DAY..?.!!

 

Thumbs up if u like it :'(

 

 

 

 

lawl. I probably sound like an insensitive bastard, but people who type with poor syntax like that makes it harder for me to take them seriously.

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I'm not sure people quite understand how cancer works.

 

A True Luv STORY:-

Please Read :(

 

A girl friend gave a challenge 2 her

boy friend 2 live a day without her ,

 

No communication at all & said if he

 

passed it,

she'll luv him 4evr.

D bf agreed & he didn't text n call her d whole day,without knowing dat his gf had only 24 hrs 2 live.

Bcz she was suffering 4m cancer,

he excitedly went 2 her gf's home d nxt day.

Tears fel as she saw his gf laying in a coffin wid a noteon d side

"U DID IT BABY, CAN U DO IT EVERY DAY..?.!!

 

Thumbs up if u like it :'(

 

 

 

 

i had to read this like 3 times to understand what the fuck it was trying to say. really softens the blow

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Yeah I felt like I had been told a joke backwards in broken English, and then had it explained to me 3 more times before I finally figured out that it was just fucking stupid.

 

I think it could really shine comedically given sufficient sleep deprivation.

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest EleminoP

"stop sugar coding things for me. i'm not that sensitive believe it or not. i'm one of the most fun and chill guys here."

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