Guest murphythecat8 Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 yeah I feel you. My mom is quite selfish also and she never really seems to care about anything that I do. In hr head, the fact that 15 years ago, I used to love science shows tells her that I shouldnt become anything else but a scientist, no matter my speech about reality, meditation, my intereste in psychedelic, ect. My mom, my GF mom, pretty much every mom I know, use that guilt making you feel as you never do enough for her. but, narsisist or not, those are just words btw, they never really define anything, has a son, you have to protect yourself from her guilty messages, but the solution is not by simply cut her off your life. You have to be stronger then this, smile and still love her, no matter what she say or does, she suffer probably way more then you in her life. The fact is, you still love her, no matter what, so protect yourself from her message, dont get affected by it, but still show her some love! BTW, that post was written while listening to wisp-we miss you. Its not my fault if it sound a bit cheesay. I love that album btw! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murphythecat8 Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Thanks for reiterating exactly what I said. sorry, I thought you meant something else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Candiru Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 At school, I majored in marketing. Just get your degree, people said, and everything would be fine. Well I'm sure it would have been fine if I didn't graduate in 2009 amidst the economic fuckery we inhabit today. Plus once out of school, I had no interest to pursue any kind of entry level job that would lead to a career in marketing. At interviews for internships, I guess I just couldn't fake enough interest to get in the door. I lolligagged at shitty jobs for a couple of years and then got certified in biotech manufacturing, which is something I don't have to fake interest in and at least makes decent money from the get-go. Basically, I work in a clean room, performing procedures on weird machines that isolate the active ingredient in vaccines. But I got switched to the night shift to be trained on the real stuff and that change in sleep schedule is currently kicking my ass. Help me wattm. Help me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goDel Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 yeah I feel you. My mom is quite selfish also and she never really seems to care about anything that I do. In hr head, the fact that 15 years ago, I used to love science shows tells her that I shouldnt become anything else but a scientist, no matter my speech about reality, meditation, my intereste in psychedelic, ect. My mom, my GF mom, pretty much every mom I know, use that guilt making you feel as you never do enough for her. but, narsisist or not, those are just words btw, they never really define anything, has a son, you have to protect yourself from her guilty messages, but the solution is not by simply cut her off your life. You have to be stronger then this, smile and still love her, no matter what she say or does, she suffer probably way more then you in her life. The fact is, you still love her, no matter what, so protect yourself from her message, dont get affected by it, but still show her some love! BTW, that post was written while listening to wisp-we miss you. Its not my fault if it sound a bit cheesay. I love that album btw! Thanks, but I really have to disagree with the "just words" thing. From my 13th to my 16th I was seeing two therapists because of being depressed. My mom at the time, and from that time on btw, showed me her love by telling me how my behaviour was something which made my future as bleak as can be. O, and btw, she reframed her point of view to how everybody else would see it. In other words, she put herself into a position between me and the rest of the world, telling me what awful things the rest of the world thought of me and how awful my future would be if I didn't change. That's her mantra. Her way of showing her affection. Being 13 I can assure you I didn't have the assertiveness nor the emotional intelligence to protect myself from her version of reality. My only protection was this black pit of depression which was my only hiding place from this ongoing terror. Her solution was giving me the proverbial kick, like you kick a machine which stopped working. And she was my mum, right? So there had to be some core of truth to what she said. She's my mother, how could she not tell the truth? Also, my older sister had been in therapy from her 9th. I've learned this only recently, btw. I hope you realise this is not just some incident. Of course, the reality in families with a narcissistic parent is a well kept secret. Growing up in such a fake reality, it's pretty much a given that you don't know actual reality until very much later in your life when you start to bump your head against this actual real world. Until then, this fake reality is like oxygen. When you're young, your parents have this divine status where anything they say is the law of the land. If your mother puts you on a guilt trip, it's because she speaks the truth. If you assume a kid could just recognise it when a parent talks crap, you should think twice. Also, being quite selfish is somewhat different to completely ignoring personal boundaries and raising children like assets to your personality. Her love is a destructive love. Her desires are destructive desires. Sometimes, protection from her reality is only achieved by completely disconnecting. The real sickness is that she's got this black whole inside of her where she just can't see why the things she does, do so much damage. Your solution is to embrace the person who is unable to respect the existence and boundaries of your soul. Currently, my journey is to learn to love myself again. And in order to achieve that, learning to unlove my mother basically was the beginning. The hurt from my youth was not my responsibility. It was hers. Loving her at this point, is basically like jumping off a cliff back into the pit of depression. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest A/D Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Yeah, as much as I think my parents are great, they did make me feel ashamed of wanting therapy as teenager. I still haven't told them I've been seeing someone because I'm not sure they would understand. You gotta find your own way with that stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beerwolf Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Please post any significant moments in your life that have completely changed your perspective on how you live and what decisions you make on a day to day basis. None of your fucking business. Prick. Why are some of you bleeding your souls to some random dude who you don't know? What's your significant moments in your life Mister Poole? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pafr Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Why are some of you bleeding your souls to some random dude who you don't know? Because I fucking want to, prick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beerwolf Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Why are some of you bleeding your souls to some random dude who you don't know? Because I fucking want to, prick. Good luck to you then. Hope you patch up your bleeding soul. Something that I've always wondered about is newbies who have a few hundred posts and then gather round in General Banter, and start fucking going on about their life. Like who gives a fuck? We're here to talk fucking music mate. Not your life. Once you've done a thousand posts, made enemies, made friends, pissed off Autechre fans, then feel free to bleat on about your existence on planet Earth. 'til then shut the fuck up. You crack on mate. Sad cunt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brian trageskin Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Why are some of you bleeding your souls to some random dude who you don't know? Because I fucking want to, prick. Good luck to you then. Hope you patch up your bleeding soul. Something that I've always wondered about is newbies who have a few hundred posts and then gather round in General Banter, and start fucking going on about their life. Like who gives a fuck? We're here to talk fucking music mate. Not your life. Once you've done a thousand posts, made enemies, made friends, pissed off Autechre fans, then feel free to bleat on about your existence on planet Earth. 'til then shut the fuck up. You crack on mate. Sad cunt. lel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest zaphod Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 hahahaha i really do question the mental state of anyone who overshares to this degree behind the thin veil of internet anonymity. it's very strange. would you start saying this to people at a party? and it happens everywhere, not just watmm. people posting very detailed accounts of personal problems, baring their souls to a void. i guess you're all that lonely. really weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hma Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 hahahaha i really do question the mental state of anyone who overshares to this degree behind the thin veil of internet anonymity. it's very strange. would you start saying this to people at a party? and it happens everywhere, not just watmm. people posting very detailed accounts of personal problems, baring their souls to a void. i guess you're all that lonely. really weird. Because writing stuff is not the same as saying it out loud? And you`re not at the party, you`re probably at home by your computer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LimpyLoo Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Guys, I have face herpes. (face herpes subforum IMO) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xox Posted February 8, 2014 Share Posted February 8, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pafr Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 Why are some of you bleeding your souls to some random dude who you don't know? Because I fucking want to, prick. Good luck to you then. Hope you patch up your bleeding soul. Something that I've always wondered about is newbies who have a few hundred posts and then gather round in General Banter, and start fucking going on about their life. Like who gives a fuck? We're here to talk fucking music mate. Not your life. Once you've done a thousand posts, made enemies, made friends, pissed off Autechre fans, then feel free to bleat on about your existence on planet Earth. 'til then shut the fuck up. You crack on mate. Sad cunt. Yes, I'm a sad cunt. Almost suicidal. I don't own a gun and probably never will because I'm afraid that I'm way too likely to shoot myself with it (a gunshot to the head is much less painful way to die than many other options), especially during my depression episodes. Well, the good thing about online is that the question is there. This thread is still on going. Nobody asked me these questions in real life, and even if they did, I can probably only think of a few shitty examples at the moment. I'm not someone who just reacts to what's going on right now. When I read/experience/feel/etc something, it often sits in the back of my mind. If it's really fascinating or intriguing, then I'm more likely to revisit them. I guess most people just go on with their lives without using their brain much at all like self reflection, just daydreaming or using your imagination. You people should be familiar with the creative process since this is a music forum, not just some shitty music forum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xox Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 stay on pafr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murphythecat8 Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 Why are some of you bleeding your souls to some random dude who you don't know? Because I fucking want to, prick. Good luck to you then. Hope you patch up your bleeding soul. Something that I've always wondered about is newbies who have a few hundred posts and then gather round in General Banter, and start fucking going on about their life. Like who gives a fuck? We're here to talk fucking music mate. Not your life. Once you've done a thousand posts, made enemies, made friends, pissed off Autechre fans, then feel free to bleat on about your existence on planet Earth. 'til then shut the fuck up. You crack on mate. Sad cunt. Thats a really sad post, maybe you should start open up yourself, on internet or whatever, you seem to have a lot of hatred going on. hahahaha i really do question the mental state of anyone who overshares to this degree behind the thin veil of internet anonymity. it's very strange. would you start saying this to people at a party? and it happens everywhere, not just watmm. people posting very detailed accounts of personal problems, baring their souls to a void. i guess you're all that lonely. really weird. What is actually weird, is why someone on a forum try to act cool and be cool. what is really weird, is how cant you figure out why someone would talk about their personnal problem overtinternet, is that rocket science? Sometime its hard to express itself honestly in front of somebody else, so talking anonymosly can be a good thing. Why are some of you bleeding your souls to some random dude who you don't know? Because I fucking want to, prick. Good luck to you then. Hope you patch up your bleeding soul. Something that I've always wondered about is newbies who have a few hundred posts and then gather round in General Banter, and start fucking going on about their life. Like who gives a fuck? We're here to talk fucking music mate. Not your life. Once you've done a thousand posts, made enemies, made friends, pissed off Autechre fans, then feel free to bleat on about your existence on planet Earth. 'til then shut the fuck up. You crack on mate. Sad cunt. Yes, I'm a sad cunt. Almost suicidal. I don't own a gun and probably never will because I'm afraid that I'm way too likely to shoot myself with it (a gunshot to the head is much less painful way to die than many other options), especially during my depression episodes. Well, the good thing about online is that the question is there. This thread is still on going. Nobody asked me these questions in real life, and even if they did, I can probably only think of a few shitty examples at the moment. I'm not someone who just reacts to what's going on right now. When I read/experience/feel/etc something, it often sits in the back of my mind. If it's really fascinating or intriguing, then I'm more likely to revisit them. I guess most people just go on with their lives without using their brain much at all like self reflection, just daydreaming or using your imagination. You people should be familiar with the creative process since this is a music forum, not just some shitty music forum. Keep your day dreaming and your pondering about life and its purpose, your on the good path. Killing yourselves wont help you, you dnot want to die, you just want more happiness, more peace, more pleasure, it wont happen if you die. go against the rain if you need to, fuck society and all the pressure it has on our life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest zaphod Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 you're right, it isn't weird. it's sad. you're sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murphythecat8 Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sheatheman Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 This is kind of a popcorn thread now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest pafr Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 I'm not trying to hide behind online identities. I know that pretty much everyone on the internet knows who I am in real life now. If not, then you might be living under a rock for too long. There was one person I met on the internet that I tried to help him/her not to commit suicide. I don't even know his/her gender because he (gonna refer to he because it feels like that's the most likely) never told me and refused of all the times I tried to ask. It seemed that he lived somewhere in Europe based on time zone, and he seemed very wise and probably middle aged to old age too. I don't know if you can still look him up: Zu Nny. He had a tumblr and facebook page of very depressing but beautiful artwork done by various artists. You can tell by the way he talks and the type of art he likes that he's super depressed. Also he mentioned his family wanted him to get psychological treatment and he didn't like it but it seemed like he was forced to. I was also kinda depressed at the time too. That was a huge change in my life, interacting with him and trying to convince him multiple times that life is still worth living, even though every time he convinced me that suicide for him might not be a bad option. During the whole time I tried to comfort him, trying to find good reasons why he should still live, probably the most love I've shown and given to anyone. We lost touch after a bit, and when I checked back like about a year or so ago, I couldn't find his online pages anymore. I'd say that Zu and Rebeca were both most significant influences on my perspective on life. I loved Zu more than Rebeca though. I tend to fall for people whom I find weaker than me but beautiful creatures at heart. Most people in this world suck. PS: ah found one of his pages. So I guess he's probably Russian lol. http://vk.com/id116260602 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sheatheman Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 pafr, your identity is still safe. I have no clue who you are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lumpenprol Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 dang, what's up with everyone being mean-spirited and abusive all of a sudden. Nothing wrong with wanting to spill your guts anonymously. If someone takes it too far, an eye roll or the dreaded "smh" will suffice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goDel Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 hahahaha i really do question the mental state of anyone who overshares to this degree behind the thin veil of internet anonymity. it's very strange. would you start saying this to people at a party? and it happens everywhere, not just watmm. people posting very detailed accounts of personal problems, baring their souls to a void. i guess you're all that lonely. really weird. Not sure what the problem is with sharing a story over the internet. Odds that we'll ever meet are close to zero. And the odds that people here get in contact with someone I know in real life, likewise. Even if my identity is known. I'd rather share personal stories than post mugshots, tbh. And I don't see many critical posts in the mugshot thread about people being lonely or something. So sharing pictures is ok? And it hasn't got to do with loneliness either. It's not like I haven't shared my stories in real life. Was that the assumption, btw? People who share over the internet tend to be unable to share in real life? If people at a party start getting comfortable in "oversharing" their personal stories, would you tell them they're weird lonely people? What is oversharing anyways? Being too vulnerable? Vulnerable for what? The NSA? Ddos attacks? Some dick hacking my mail account? If you don't like personal stories, don't read them. If you don't like oversharing parties, don't be that dick who thinks he should educate everyone about his opinion that oversharing is stupid at the oversharing party itself. Just leave and tell your cooler other friends how stupid those people are, if that is what satisfies your ego. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YEK Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 dang, what's up with everyone being mean-spirited and abusive all of a sudden. Nothing wrong with wanting to spill your guts anonymously. If someone takes it too far, an eye roll or the dreaded "smh" will suffice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LimpyLoo Posted February 9, 2014 Share Posted February 9, 2014 obv zaphod is just mad cuz the middle section of his face fell off Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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