Films Recently Watched

[Guest zaphod]

well duh, the script was horrible and the movie's analogy with "our current economic climate" was absurd and forced. if the whole movie had just been about gangsters killing each other and not had cspan playing in bars and then brad pitt still delivered that line at the end it might have worked. maybe. but liotta's beating was really good. i've never seen a movie where a guy gets roughed up and it actually seems to fuck him up mentally and physically. maybe it was over the top, but i found it unique in films of this type.

Punk bitches, I liked the way the dialogue flowed in Silver Linings. I felt the same way about this little beauty. I thought ZAPHOD would have far more taste.

 

silver linings playbook was abhorrent. btw i have atrocious taste in film and am not an authority on anything so please take my "reviews" with a gigantic grain of salt.

Edited April 23, 2013 by zaphod

[Schlitze]

 

that movie gets a couple points for ray liotta's beating. maybe the drug sequence. other than that it was pretty bad.

I also just couldn't help but lol @ the attempted conflation of gangster amorality and capitalism. I mean, it's not exactly a difficult connection to make in the first place, so why belabor the point? He was far more clever with the script of Jesse James - especially since the gambit wasn't clear for the first hour or so of the film.

thats the crime caper part, u punks! I'd love to sit next to you guys in the cinema so i could explain all these nuances. I would whisper them to you ```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````

Edited April 23, 2013 by Schlitze

[Schlitze]

Zaphod, what the hell was forced?

[Guest Mirezzi]

Django Unchained - Better than Inglorious, I think, but not much.

 

Once again, like Inglorious, the drawn out dialog scenes were entertaining, funny, well-acted, and built a lot of tension from very little plot material. Tarantino pours a lot of clever thought into his films, but fuck almighty does he need an empowered producer and editor to rein his shit in. 2 hours and 45 fucking minutes?!

 

So, with that:

• it was at least 30 minutes too long
• the gibby ketchup violence was stupid and distracting - why? what's wrong with a straightforward and pared down bit of violence? does he think he's Peckinpah on roids or something?
• 2/3 of the film was brilliant thanks to King Schultz and the "My Two Dads" dynamic he forms with Calvin Candie, as the two white monoliths of slavery: interventionist liberalism and racist plantation owners. I get that the story needed to shed these characters so we'd be left with the Assimilationist Uncle Tom (Stephen) and the Militant Separatist (Django) to wrestle one another Mandingo-style, but the final 1/3 of the film is a boring as fuck revenge tragedy with more of the ketchup splatter and none of the clever polish Tarantino infused into the first 2/3.

An editor alone could have saved this film and made it a near-gem. Instead, it's a flawed as hell but enjoyable movie.

 

I will also add that I think Spike Lee is right about one thing: Tarantino likes to be naughty and drop "nigger" into his films 1,000,000 times while hiding behind his black friends and actors in the media. It's just like the ketchup splatter. You know he's doing it on purpose and trying to needle audiences, but after awhile, it's excruciating. Listening to a Tarantino script is like babysitting an 8 year-old on crack...with Tourette's.

[blackdust]

The last stand 5/10

 

Started out kinda promising... Turned into a comedy, plus Arnie got worse at acting.

[Schlitze]

Jesus, The Overlook

[lumpenprol]

The bullet time death - wtf was that? Why did that matter?

 

 

agree with you on that at least. Completely gratuitous.

[Guest Mirezzi]

 

The bullet time death - wtf was that? Why did that matter?

 

 

agree with you on that at least. Completely gratuitous.

 

 

Did you like it, Lumpy? Shit, I may have already forgotten what you thought of it. Wow, I'm getting really old.

[Nebraska]

Django Unchained - Better than Inglorious, I think, but not much.

 

Once again, like Inglorious, the drawn out dialog scenes were entertaining, funny, well-acted, and built a lot of tension from very little plot material. Tarantino pours a lot of clever thought into his films, but fuck almighty does he need an empowered producer and editor to rein his shit in. 2 hours and 45 fucking minutes?!

 

So, with that:

• it was at least 30 minutes too long
• the gibby ketchup violence was stupid and distracting - why? what's wrong with a straightforward and pared down bit of violence? does he think he's Peckinpah on roids or something?
• 2/3 of the film was brilliant thanks to King Schultz and the "My Two Dads" dynamic he forms with Calvin Candie, as the two white monoliths of slavery: interventionist liberalism and racist plantation owners. I get that the story needed to shed these characters so we'd be left with the Assimilationist Uncle Tom (Stephen) and the Militant Separatist (Django) to wrestle one another Mandingo-style, but the final 1/3 of the film is a boring as fuck revenge tragedy with more of the ketchup splatter and none of the clever polish Tarantino infused into the first 2/3.

An editor alone could have saved this film and made it a near-gem. Instead, it's a flawed as hell but enjoyable movie.

 

I will also add that I think Spike Lee is right about one thing: Tarantino likes to be naughty and drop "nigger" into his films 1,000,000 times while hiding behind his black friends and actors in the media. It's just like the ketchup splatter. You know he's doing it on purpose and trying to needle audiences, but after awhile, it's excruciating. Listening to a Tarantino script is like babysitting an 8 year-old on crack...with Tourette's.

 

this is exactly the reason i haven't watched this movie despite really wanting to see it. i just can't see the reason for making a film that long (especially nowadays) but especially more so when it's tarantino whose pretty much doing nothing more than rehashing other films.

 

 

awesome film that's kinda like an unofficial sequel to slumber party massacre with robyn harris. slurp!

[Guest RadarJammer]

Broken City $55,000,000? no fuckin way. This had to be a cash cleaning operation or something. Lazy bad 1 take acting and a $10 script 1/10

[Schlitze]

 

I've seen Sorority House Massacre 2 twice and it doesnt hold a candle to Slaugher High, you punk

 

 

 

awesome film that's kinda like an unofficial sequel to slumber party massacre with robyn harris. slurp!

[Schlitze]

Wasn't sure about the bullet time death, just a completely gratious homage to Verhoevens Spetters? In any case it didn't matter. This is a crime caper movie, people, ala Dog Day Afternoon. Jeez.

 

 

Edited April 23, 2013 by Schlitze

[Alcofribas]

it's a totally mediocre "crime caper" movie. and its attempts to rise out of this mediocrity fall completely flat, eg the tedious cspan stuff and the totally flat/boring drug scene. like wow man, heroin makes stuff blurry and puts reverb over the vox. trippy.

[Guest Mirezzi]

it's a totally mediocre "crime caper" movie. and its attempts to rise out of this mediocrity fall completely flat, eg the tedious cspan stuff and the totally flat/boring drug scene. like wow man, heroin makes stuff blurry and puts reverb over the vox. trippy.

100%

[lumpenprol]

 

 

The bullet time death - wtf was that? Why did that matter?

 

 

agree with you on that at least. Completely gratuitous.

 

 

Did you like it, Lumpy? Shit, I may have already forgotten what you thought of it. Wow, I'm getting really old.

 

I liked it ok, think I gave it 7/10. I can totally see where you guys are coming from with your crits though, I'm basically just nodding my head reading your comments. Can't really say much in its defense except that I liked the idea of casting the hit man as the most businesslike of all criminals, and the filmmaking was "lush". The economic parallels were indeed heavy handed and implausible (criminals watching c-span?) but the bleak cynicism and dark humor of the film was interesting. Kind of like in Animal Kingdom, which I loved, where it's like a nightmare where "the law" can't help, all the characters can't escape each other, and an evil hag seems to have an almost preternatural ability to control events around her. Though the word is overused, there's something Kafka-esque about certain crime movies, that dreamlike sense of dread and the inevitable, that this film also had a bit of, too.

 

disclaimer: I watched it while on my exercise bike and was in a pretty good and tolerant mood.

 

Overall feelling was "hey, pretty...not bad...pretty decent acting from Pitt, for the most part...slow-mo shooting scene was certainly gratuitous tho"

[Guest Mirezzi]

Lumpy - Simply put, you are no longer allowed to watch films under the influence of endorphins.

[Nebraska]

I've seen Sorority House Massacre 2 twice and it doesnt hold a candle to Slaugher High, you punk

 

i checked that and it doesn't feature any screen queens so i'm gonna bypass.

[Guest zaphod]

Lumpy - Simply put, you are no longer allowed to watch films under the influence of endorphins.

 

when i won the "triple crown" of hate in 2009 and was crowned grand master of loathing, i would never have dreamed of writing such a well reasoned, thoughtful and, worst of all, forgiving review of a film. i mean, 7/10?? honestly, i'm getting nauseous just thinking about scrolling up a few posts and seeing it again. it's almost like something a normal human being would say (i haven't spoken in years) to another human after watching a film. maybe over dinner. probably something said to a...i can't even get the word out. a f. a frie- no, i can't type it. i won't.

[Alcofribas]

lol

[Guest Mirezzi]

lol

[lumpenprol]

haha zaphod, I'm honored to be loathed so articulately. Or is that articulatedly? Which I am, not.

[eugene]

future weather - coming of age of a science/environment obsessed girl from a problematic family - couldn't finish. too indie, conventional and uninteresting

 

sound of my voice - very solid and engaging, brit marling was mesmerizing - 8/10

 

cell 211 - (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1242422/) retarded and implausible prison thriller with anti-authoritarian aspirations, still pretty fun very colorful, hollywood remake very likely - 6/10

 

the double hour (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1379222/) - 4/10 - psych drama/thriller with a stupid in-your-face twist that's supposed to hold the movie together

 

antiviral - babby cronenberg's first future. somewhat interesting premise but the film itself mostly involves main character (a disgustingly ugly ginger) stumbling around being sick, puking and smearing blood all over. really boring. - 3/10

[Guest Jimmy McMessageboard]

 

sound of my voice - very solid and engaging, brit marling was mesmerizing - 8/10

 

 

yes she is. great film.

[TRiP]

Flawlessly enjoyable, as with all Almodovar films - but doesn't stand too highly among his past films - its a pure comedy, so its a little one noted. - not bad, not amazing - just fine.
Almodovar/10

 

[eugene]

starlet - a really good, heartfelt and fresh take on a well trodden "mismatched-friends" premise, beautiful cinematography and great acting. 8.5/10