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Bezos Vs The National Enquirer

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turns out the national enquirer has (somehow) acquired some rather embarrassing pictures of the world's richest man. according to them:

 

 

below the belt selfie — otherwise colloquially known as a ‘d*ck pick

 

a shirtless mr. bezos holding his phone in his left hand — while wearing his wedding ring. He’s wearing either tight black cargo pants or shorts — and his semi-erect manhood is penetrating the zipper of said garment.

 

there is more:

 

it turns out mr.pecker (owner of the national enquirer) is a trump supporter and like any other trump supporter- he hates the washington post (owned by bezos). so his point of threatening bezos to publish his "dick pick" and those other pictures was (allegedly) blackmail and extortion. oh yeah, and trump is involved because he hates bezos. and so do the saudi's. because they like trump.

 

turns out however, bezos doesn't bend so easily. after all, he hired this security dude he's known for 20 years and told him proceed with an investigation with "whatever budget he needed". usually, governments hire that guy. then bezos made public the blackmail e-mails which throws the ball right back to the national enquirer's court.

 

either they withdraw, or we'll be getting some dick picks by the weekend.

 

https://medium.com/@jeffreypbezos/no-thank-you-mr-pecker-146e3922310f

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Does the carpet match the drapes?

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Dr Evil had his testicles ritualistically shaven, so yes

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Pics or it didn't happen

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Dammit, I'm still eating dinner

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what idiot tries to blackmail a billionaire, not just any billionaire but the richest man in the world, with a dick pic?  fucking moron. 

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Maybe his dick is the amazon logo 

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I bet Bezos will be really embarrased when the whole world discovers he has functioning genitalia

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taking Bezos and computing

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Penos

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Does the carpet match the drapes?

 

giphy.gif

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he hired this security dude he's known for 20 years and told him proceed with an investigation with "whatever budget he needed". usually, governments hire that guy.

 

governments? what about those alphabet agencies? damn, private companies really flurish in tha usa

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Does the carpet match the drapes?

 

giphy.gif

 

hahahaha . . . 'eight years old, dude'

 

 

 

 

governments? what about those alphabet agencies? damn, private companies really flurish in tha usa

 

now that Bezos owns the post, plus the fact that Amazon is doing data structuring for langley (https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2014/07/the-details-about-the-cias-deal-with-amazon/374632/) means that we will most likely have no more stories like this from the post: http://projects.washingtonpost.com/top-secret-america/articles/a-hidden-world-growing-beyond-control/

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bezos dick pic vs trump pee tape

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First they came for the rich cunts, and I did not speak out because I was not a rich cunt.

 

And everything was fine and I had a good lol about it

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Is there any way we can just dump both sides of this fight into the ocean?

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I bet Bezos will be really embarrased when the whole world discovers he has functioning genitalia

 

Maybe it's all gnarled and weird and looks like Baby Mario from Mario Kart or something.

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Microdick or Ron Jermey. Place your bets.

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I bet Bezos will be really embarrased when the whole world discovers he has functioning genitalia

Maybe it's all gnarled and weird and looks like Baby Mario from Mario Kart or something.

Do all rich powerful old dicks look like mario kart characters?

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Dy2vgLpXgAAIeFy.jpg

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god i love the post

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bezos doesn't bend so easily

 

Guess we'll see

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Also depends on the level of excitement, i guess. ;)

 

Pretty nuts (huhu) considering Pecker is working with SDNY in the Stormy Daniels case. Who'd guess everything would be connected. From a, or two, pee-tapes to Stormy Daniels, US president, brutally mudered journalist, to Bezos selfies. Suddenly, the whole pizzagate nonsense sounds viable again. :)

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Microdick or Ron Jermey. Place your bets.

 

 

"trump" or "Hedgehog"

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