A few films recently watched.

[AJW]

To be honest if i'm going to go to the cinema and pay for a popcorn flick it'd better have a shitload of splosions, tits, and lame jokes rather than iteration #4598292 of the same played out formula and lame story. "oh he's a divorced cop with a desire for revenge" "oh how charming i immediately care about him, wonder how it'll all turn out, and what difficulties he'll have to overcome" fuck you! i'm not an idiot just give me an overload of the senses already, which is what the transformers movies do so well, they're a drug.

 

I find an attempt to pass a lame story and played out characters as entertainment more insulting to me that a blatant appeal to the senses with no story.

 

This is why the Crank films are the best action films since....a long fucking time.

[Guest ruiagnelo]

i pirated transformers 3 because i make a point of stealing money from that racist douche every time he releases a film.

 

it's hard to know where to start. it's literally difficult to comprehend that they allowed a film to be released that pays so little attention to the basics of storytelling and getting an audience involved.

 

fucking film doesnt even end, it just stops. its time for the baddies to die so they die. no sense of hero overcoming anything, no macguffin device activated, no riddle solved, no sacrifices, no being clever, nothing. its like he could have killed them whenever but he just chose then. EVEN THE UNDERPAID KOREANS WHO DREW THE SHITTY 80S TOY AD CARTOONS COULD TELL A BETTER STORY

 

and as for making a film where there are no real good guys because shia is a fucking selfish dick and optimous is a mass murderer and its a film for 8 YEAR OLDS. what, do you actually openly hate children? it's the storytelling equivalent of looking after your sister's kids for a week and taking them to Denny's for every meal. not even the slightest attempt to get anything good or worthwhile into them. no thought for what the shit you do shovel in them might do in the long run.

 

recipe for good popcorn movie:

 

1. make audience give a fuck about some characters

2. imperil said characters in visually interesting fashion

3. save characters in way that affirms the stuff you came to like about characters in step 1

 

recipe for michael bay movie:

 

1. splosions

2. tits

3. dick jokes

4. linkin park

 

you see the difference, bay apologists?

 

best movie review in a while

[data]

 

fun

[lumpenprol]

he isnt observing anything. he's in the alt dimension. or at least his conscious is inside the guy in that dimension.

I know that. My point is, if the scientists truly understand that, why is the chick all "omg" at the end when he sends her the note?

 

they didn't know?

 

at the risk of kicking a dead horse...here's another (more logically consistent) version of the film: "govt. dudes figure out how to project your consciousness into the last 8 minutes of any dead person's life. Train blows up. They project dude back 8 minutes inside one dude. He can see what that dude saw, but not influence events. He can't figure out who bombed them based on this dude's memories. So, they send him back again inside someone else. This person saw the suspicious dude going inside the bathroom. Next time, back inside someone else, who saw this guy talking on his cell phone...and so on. Eventually from the varying POVs they are able to build a suspicion that it's one particular dude. They beam dude back into this dude's head, and watch him plant the bomb. End of movie."

 

What's the problem with this version? Well, it's boring as fuck, you don't build up empathy for a single character, etc. So they came up with various forced limitations to the story. Ok, since we want to build up audience empathy, we say he can only beam into one dude's head, because he's "biologically compatible." And we'll make him a mutilated chopper pilot trapped inside some virtual reality land in his own mind. Aaaand we'll make him be able to influence events, so the story can have some drama (and to allow for the ending, where he "saves" people). However, if you allow him to influence events, then it's pretty fucking obvious what he's doing is actually time travel, where he splits up our dimension into various different dimensions with different outcomes. The black scientist dude even says as much.

 

So no-one should be fucking surprised at the end when he pops up and says he already solved the situation without their knowledge. They should have expected that would be the natural outcome, if they were inside the dimension which had the best possible outcome...or did I miss something?

[cruising for burgers]

:clapping:

[Guest viscosity]

subconscious cruelty... very melodramatic, overly poetic, and kinda amateurish but i guess that's what to be expected. was more like a showing of vignettes then a full film though. What the director said in the intro is true.. this stuff has been far surpassed by the shit that pops up daily on the internets; this kind of stuff just rarely phases people anymore

 

begotten- i could only imagine this is some twisted sacrificial ceremony. really liked the aesthetic of the film; couldn't help but think geogaddi the whole way through. if anyone knows any good documentaries or movies about cults, i'd be interested

[Guest Deep Fried Everything]

tree of life - jellyfish-supernova/10 (i really liked it )

 

very very good but i'd be picky of course about who i would recommend it to. i did feel that the connection to sean penn's character was a little tenuous, i mean i understood what was meant to be communicated but i just thought that part of the story (?) got short shrift a little bit. might feel differently if i watched it again.

[Guest Benedict Cumberbatch]

go

why must that annoying english guy be in it? and why must he be annoying? was this australian? it felt australian quality.

 

 

still haven't seen tree of life. just can't quite make it to the cinema

[jeremymacgregor87]

Tree of Life

 

beautifully shot, and why people would leave for the fucking creation scene just boggles the mind

[awepittance]

he isnt observing anything. he's in the alt dimension. or at least his conscious is inside the guy in that dimension.

I know that. My point is, if the scientists truly understand that, why is the chick all "omg" at the end when he sends her the note?

 

they didn't know?

 

at the risk of kicking a dead horse...here's another (more logically consistent) version of the film: "govt. dudes figure out how to project your consciousness into the last 8 minutes of any dead person's life. Train blows up. They project dude back 8 minutes inside one dude. He can see what that dude saw, but not influence events. He can't figure out who bombed them based on this dude's memories. So, they send him back again inside someone else. This person saw the suspicious dude going inside the bathroom. Next time, back inside someone else, who saw this guy talking on his cell phone...and so on. Eventually from the varying POVs they are able to build a suspicion that it's one particular dude. They beam dude back into this dude's head, and watch him plant the bomb. End of movie."

 

What's the problem with this version? Well, it's boring as fuck, you don't build up empathy for a single character, etc. So they came up with various forced limitations to the story. Ok, since we want to build up audience empathy, we say he can only beam into one dude's head, because he's "biologically compatible." And we'll make him a mutilated chopper pilot trapped inside some virtual reality land in his own mind. Aaaand we'll make him be able to influence events, so the story can have some drama (and to allow for the ending, where he "saves" people). However, if you allow him to influence events, then it's pretty fucking obvious what he's doing is actually time travel, where he splits up our dimension into various different dimensions with different outcomes. The black scientist dude even says as much.

 

So no-one should be fucking surprised at the end when he pops up and says he already solved the situation without their knowledge. They should have expected that would be the natural outcome, if they were inside the dimension which had the best possible outcome...or did I miss something?

 

i dont know, i just can;t believe that we're still making movies about terrorists blowing up trains (especially someone hyped up like duncan jones who's supposed to be creative). shits going to seem more dated even compared to 50s and 60s movies about communist spies

[lumpenprol]

true dat. So I just watched Sucker Punch. It was as jaw droppingly terrible as someone else here said. If you want to see exactly how you should never open a film, check this one out.

 

Actually some of the action/vfx were well done - if you ignored the typical Zack Snyder slow-mo fetishizing - but the blatant exploitation of the female characters was very creepy, to the point where even my sleazy pedo impulses went into hibernation.

 

A bad film, and a disturbing one. Oh, Snyder also deserves to be tortured for including absolutely horrific cover versions of "Tomorrow Never Knows", "Where is My Mind?", and others, and for tarnishing Bjork's "Army of Me" by using it score an action sequence in his shit film.

[data]

 

6/10

 

better than i remembered it. :sup:

[MAXIMUS MISCHIEF]

wtf do u guys have against terrorists blowing up trains. there are so many things going on in that movie, thats not the only thing its about.

moon was about fucking astronauts on the moon, what a piece of shit that thing has been BEATEN TO DEATH SO MANY MOON MOVIES .

[SR4]

Children of Men-6/10

 

 

I had a long-winded diatribe about why this movie is nowhere near as good as people say, but basically it held my attention until the end

 

 

 

WHERE THE FUCKING BABY MADE EVERYONE STOP FIGHTING....seriously, that baby would have either been shot dead right there or confiscated. why can't a post apocalyptic film try to maintain some form of realism in their conclusions? why is it always hopeful?

 

[lumpenprol]

I liked the baby stopping the fighting, I didn't think it was beyond plausibility. Lighten up :)

 

I agree about always needing to have a happy ending, though I think it was nice in this case since the rest of the film was so bleak...but it was all a bit deus ex machina. Would you have been happier if they just floated out into the mist?

 

I think Children of Men is a great but flawed film. The action sequences are unbelievably good and gritty. The long shots and art direction are amazing. But the quiet moments are all pretty dull, and it doesn't have much plot to speak of. I've rewatched it a few times and the boring stretches between the action are hard to suffer through.

 

In general I would like more SF films with bizarre, ambiguous endings. Of course there's 2001. The Quiet Earth. Solaris (original) probably has the best I can think of, brilliant. Blade Runner's I guess counts.

[plstik]

Norwegian Wood 6,5/10

Not the same as the book etc. etc., but for me it worked as a movie. Great scenery, but the characters seemed a bit thin and almost no storm trooper.

[awepittance]

 

moon was about fucking astronauts on the moon, what a piece of shit that thing has been BEATEN TO DEATH SO MANY MOON MOVIES .

 

huh? besides like a handful of other movies that exist in drastically different time periods of movie history ie moon trap, superman 2 (cause they fight on the moon for a second) and hmm Capricorn one.. having trouble thinking of any other moon centric movies. wait you're being sarcastic right? because there seems to be like 10 movies about terrorists in the united states coming out yearly

[Atop]

2001 has the best moon scenes ever. Favourite terrorist film is Team America, of course. Or Die Hard 1 - 4.

[Guest Billov]

 

The Last Action Hero - 9/10

 

better than I remembered :sup:

 

(also, saw it in a small cinema i just discovered, its Arnold season, and my friend just won 2 tickets to see True Lies on monday, can't fucking wait)

[cruising for burgers]

 

The Last Action Hero - 9/10

 

better than I remembered :sup:

 

(also, saw it in a small cinema i just discovered, its Arnold season, and my friend just won 2 tickets to see True Lies on monday, can't fucking wait)

hell yeahhhh

[MAXIMUS MISCHIEF]

 

moon was about fucking astronauts on the moon, what a piece of shit that thing has been BEATEN TO DEATH SO MANY MOON MOVIES .

 

huh? besides like a handful of other movies that exist in drastically different time periods of movie history ie moon trap, superman 2 (cause they fight on the moon for a second) and hmm Capricorn one.. having trouble thinking of any other moon centric movies. wait you're being sarcastic right? because there seems to be like 10 movies about terrorists in the united states coming out yearly

 

i would bet there are more moon movies than there are terrorist ones

[cruising for burgers]

the moon terrorists

[MAXIMUS MISCHIEF]

rude

[kokoon]

Alice. Had to take 3 sittings. What a poor poor product. I can't even say i'm disappointed because i knew it wasn't going to be very good. Well, it's disastrous.

[MAXIMUS MISCHIEF]

i was actually hopin for it to be good cuz it sounds cool ALICE IN WONDERLAND 3D you know ??? and tim burton has made some good movies , like that sweeney todd one and his older stuff and big fish was great

but ya alice in wonderland was one of the biggest pieces of shit ive ever witnessed

i still cant believe how bad it is