People Who Use Laptops on Trains

[MadameChaos]

I take a commuter bus into work each day, and here are my public transportation pet peeves:

• Fuckers who play their music too loud with shitty headphones so all you hear is the high frequencies
• Fuckers who watch videos on their phones without headphones
• Fuckers who let their stupid-ass ringtones cycle as they fumble lazily for their phone
• Fuckers who talk loudly on their phones
• Fuckers who put people on speakerphone (yes, really)
• Fuckers who sit in the outside seat, hoping nobody will sit beside them (I purposely make them get up or shift over)
• (Male) Fuckers who sit with their legs spread wide, bumping their knees against my leg (your shit ain't that big, bro - get over it)
• Fat people who come down the aisle, their bags and shit hitting you (if you're lucky), or their fat arse/leg bumping into you (if you're unlucky)
• Fuckers who don't queue up for the bus and instead stand under the shelter and then casually walk up to the bus, cutting the queue
• Fuckers who don't wait until the rows in front of them disembark, getting up and pushing their way through
• Fuckers that bring too much shit with them - drive in, FFS if you're going to bring your standing desk to work that day
• Fuckers that eat on the bus, or worse, bring smelly foods left over from their lunch or breakfast (n.b.: there is no eating on the bus, big fucking sign in plain sight lets everyone know that
• Fuckers that come on the bus sick (yeah, we all get sick sometime - well, I don't, but that's neither here nor there) and cough and sniffle
• Fuckers who lean their chairs back all the way (there is really not that much room to do this, and I end up either staring into the person's hair (which can be a terrifying experience if their hygiene is not the best)
• Women who decide to roll out the Revlon dashboard and do their makeup and primping on the way in
• Fuckers who wear way too much cologne/perfume (and it's almost always bad smelling; at least buy the good shit)
• Fuckers you catch looking at what you're doing on your phone (time to get that privacy screen protector)

Keep in mind this is supposed to be a commuter bus, mostly filled with "professionals". Goddamn.

 

all of these things annoy me, but I have some to add:

 

Sweaty fuckers who stand with their hairy groce armpits in your face on the tube etc.

Creepy fuckers who stand touching your ass for no reason (move your fucking hand).

Fuckers with a lack of spacial awareness who read a broadsheet newspaper in your face.

Fuckers who bring kids on the train/bus during rush hour and ignore them when they act up.

Fuckers who argue with the bus driver and cause him to stop the bus and call for the Police.

Fuckers who open the window when it's raining so you get cold and fucking wet (while miraculously they remain dry).

Fuckers who throw up on the train or do even worse (yes these things happen), just do it before you get on please.

 

I think I'm done.

 

Edit: one more, fuckers who smoke crack at the back of the bus.

[Amen Warrior]

It's kind of a dick move to be staring at someone's phone regardless of where you are. You aren't the intended recipient of whatever message he or she is writing.

 

Would you lean over in line at a store to stare at their phone too? Or walking down the street, start walking next to someone and try and see what they're typing?

 

=/

Once, as an (incredibly creepy) experiment, I found out a random ladies full name, age and address just from paying attention to what she was doing on her phone on the bus. She never even saw me. That's pretty scary, I could've been anyone!!

 

Anyway they still haven't found what I did with the body

[Hugh Mughnus]

lol

[Silent Member]

i've been more troubled by people talking around me than people have been troubled by the music coming out of my phone... that's a fact... of course i don't do it on places where it's silent...

i get on the bus everyone is screaming gossip around and doing every fuckin thing you mentioned that bothers you on this thread, BUS radio playing, an enormous cacophony all around and i get the looks because i'm listening to music on my phone??? fuck it... i'm on a music school, every fuckin retard tenor goes around singing in the corridors, nobody seems to care, some applaude, and i get the looks because music's coming out of my phone... humans...

 

 

oh and, the way people react in this thread just proves i'm in the middle of super-perfected-humans who can spot all the annoyances around them but they have none... right... it's liek i'm surrounded by angels...

 

the op post was pretty fun, i think i got it and i loled... that was it...

Get some headphones Michael.

[Danny O Flannagin]

None of this is as bad as the preacher lady on the train. Literally no one wants to hear you speak, your making everyone uncomfortable and the worst part is your exploiting a captive audience.

[zkom]

Y'all need to go ride some buses and trains in third world or developing countries. After that you think the rush hour commuter bus is a very tranquil and comfy experience.

[Alcofribas]

my personal pet peeve is when the guy sitting in front of you has his member out and is sending dick pics and then you get a text message and it's from him but you realize you're just looking through your camera roll at your own dick pics which you've sent to your step dad but he never replied

[Zephyr_Nova]

Working on new music in Ableton while at the terminal/on the ferry/on the bus back from Vancouver was pretty damn satisfying. I want to do more of that, even if I look like an asshole.

[BCM]

my personal pet peeve is when the guy sitting in front of you has his member out and is sending dick pics and then you get a text message and it's from him but you realize you're just looking through your camera roll at your own dick pics which you've sent to your step dad but he never replied

flol

[Joyrex]

 

It's kind of a dick move to be staring at someone's phone regardless of where you are. You aren't the intended recipient of whatever message he or she is writing.

 

Would you lean over in line at a store to stare at their phone too? Or walking down the street, start walking next to someone and try and see what they're typing?

 

=/

 

Nah, I wouldn't go out of my way to do it. But how is it any different from someone making a public phone call? If I'm already packed in close to you, with nowhere to go, should I plug my ears so I don't hear the message? Should I likewise make sure not to look at someone casually blocking me from sitting down, with their phone pointed right at me*, whining about how hard their day is? Nah. He can deal. As for JR, I mostly just wanted to poke fun at his ridiculously long list. That's the list of a man who feels anxiety before even stepping onto public transit :P

 

 

*I want to be clear: I'd have needed to turn around toward the back of the bus to avoid looking at this guys phone. There are only so many places to look on a crowded bus before you find cleavage, a dudes crotch, or a tweaker's eyes. So nope, I didn't feel like a dick. I felt pretty courteous actually.

 

I've been in that situation too where I had to stand and you can't help but look down at... things (phones included).

And FWIW: I'm not uptight or anxious; just thought this was a nice thread to vent in

[Hugh Mughnus]

my personal pet peeve is when the guy sitting in front of you has his member out and is sending dick pics and then you get a text message and it's from him but you realize you're just looking through your camera roll at your own dick pics which you've sent to your step dad but he never replied

lllllllllllllllllllllllol

[doublename]

Tourists who bring all their luggage onto subway/tube/metro at rush hour. Get a fuckin cab.

[andihow]

EXCUSE ME EVERYONE, this is embarassing for me but I need help. Currently I am homeless, I lost my job and I'm just looking for a way out. I am not a criminal and I refuse to be one so here I am on this train asking you fine new yorkers for a little help. If anyone has any food, spare change, or even a job to offer me it would be greatly appreciated. God bless and have a safe trip home. *walks around with hat*

[pcock]

full disclosure, i constantly sit and play binding of isaac on my macbook on the subway, with my full scale audio technica headphones blasting ravel, all the time. and i dont give a fuck. also when i was 15, i had a 120 quid set of portable speakers that i would play squarepusher on in my bag, while walking around smoking doobies and thinking i was cool as fuck. and tbh, i am cool as fuck.

also, i often read the person in front of me's texts and facebooks just because its mildy more interesting than the blackness of the underground

[Silent Member]

lol and lol

[Amen Warrior]

Y'all need to go ride some buses and trains in third world or developing countries. After that you think the rush hour commuter bus is a very tranquil and comfy experience.

I've travelled in sri lanka by train, its different but not necessarily worse than rush hour on the central line in London...

You couldn't pay me enough to step foot on another sri lankan bus though, so you're right there

[Candiru]

If you masturbate on the train, you get the whole car to yourself and you get to destress before work. It's quite nice.

[Guest WNS000]

EXCUSE ME EVERYONE, this is embarassing for me but I need help. Currently I am homeless, I lost my job and I'm just looking for a way out. I am not a criminal and I refuse to be one so here I am on this train asking you fine new yorkers for a little help. If anyone has any food, spare change, or even a job to offer me it would be greatly appreciated. God bless and have a safe trip home. *walks around with hat*

 

Are you serious?

If you masturbate on the train, you get the whole car to yourself and you get to destress before work. It's quite nice.

 

lol

[andihow]

What?

 

Sent from my Nexus 6P using Tapatalk

[Guest WNS000]

Sorry if I missed a joke. My understanding of English texts is imperfect.

[doublename]

Panhandlers m8.

[BCM]

Sorry if I missed a joke. My understanding of English texts is imperfect.

this is hilarious when read in a rainier wolfcastle accent

[ambermonk]

lol dis thread

After reading this I'm just glad I have a car.

[sweepstakes]

lol dis thread

 

After reading this I'm just glad I have a car.

I dunno about AK but taking the bus, slow as it is and even with the occasional obnoxious/oblivious cunt, beats the piss out of rush hour highway driving, finding parking, keeping gas in the tank, paying insurance, and making monthly payments. Fuck all that right in the pooper.

[doublename]

Driving sucks m8