logakght Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 trying to impress strangers on the interwebs tho I like your avatar... whe can I find it in better quality? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luke viia Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Damn, today I'm sad. But this time is a special kind of sadness. It hurts, but it kinda feels already normal. Like, I actually know why I feel like this, and how I (actually) tried to avoid it but still, I can't "change" or "act more normal". Maybe I'm mentally ill? After now having read your posts for years, I'm reasonably certain you possess the power to get over this melancholy sad-sack thing you seem to slip into so often. (Apologies if any of this comes off harsh; it is coming from a place of compassion). I wouldn't say this to anyone with these sorts of comments, but over time I have come to believe your issue is one of primarily self-confidence and willpower (or rather, a lack of them), among other issues. I could be entirely wrong, of course. But I have noticed that most often your complaints of sadness are extremely vague, and filled with self-doubt and an implicit request for reassurance. Have you seen a therapist, one who you can be honest with and who you trust? If not, find one. You really seem to need a proper outlet for this stuff. Many times I've noticed you'll project this sadness onto some vague issue outside yourself, like "the world sucks" or something. While I know those feelings, I cannot take them seriously, and I do not think you should either. These may be issues stemming from a larger mental issue, or they may just be something you need to toughen up about - it's impossible to say from only forum posts. And I only say any of this because this is clearly something you have been dealing with for some time, and I cannot see it ending for you any time soon unless you take action and see someone who may be able to help you or get you some sort of medication. That, or you can continue to regularly fall into this useless misery. These are deeply personal issues, and I hope you can overcome them. You may have some sort of depressive disorder, or you may just need a swift kick in the pants. Find someone you can trust to give you both medical and emotional advice; I suspect you will discover quite a bit about yourself as you look into this. The only wrong approach is to do nothing and continue to feel bad and to project sadness onto others. That creates misery for them as well as for you, and it does indeed place a burden on those close to you. Not to sound dire, but that is the sort of thing that can slowly drive large wedges into relationships, and I suspect these moods will only feed back into themselves to give you more trouble in the future if you do not proactively do something about it. I'm not sure how much your moods actually bother you IRL, but I am coming at this with only your online posts as context. I may be taking it more seriously than necessary. Either way, be well, dude. And Stephen, I hope you're alright, man. My thoughts are with ya. Well, I didn't expected this kind of answer. Thank you so much, really. I'll try to explain my feels. Basically, I feel lonely. But not lonely in the way of "omg I'm literally alone in the whole universe", no, but in the sense of that I can only make a "click" with very, very, very, VERY. few people (I only have 1 true friend right now (for me true=someone I can talk about my problems and stuff without shyness). I tend to have a really "dense" way of looking life (like, logical view instead of moral/superficial view), so most people gets scared or simply don't comprehend me. If people think my statements are vague, well, absolutely all of them mean: I feel lonely. Please someone help me. You say that I have the power to get over this, and guess what, I agree completely! In fact, I believe everyone have the power to change their lives for the good. I'm really optimistic about it, I even posted here a book I was reading about how to talk to people cuz I really want to "change" a bit for my own good. Also, I posted here too about how amazing 2014 was for me; I've been changing myself radically. While I was a child, I used to be so, so, so fucking shy, like, reaaaaally shy and quiet... In 2010 some stuff happened that made me think about it. So from it to 2014 I made stuff I didn't even thought I could do! Yes, lack of self confidence was/is a huuuge problem for me, but I really fought a lot to overcome it. I sometimes struggle, but I can certainly say I'm not as shy as I used to be. So yea, 2014 was amazing for me, personally and professionally, but then again, I had nobody to celebrate my achievements with. Yes, I have my family, but its not the same. One moment that actually depressed me a lot was when my cowriters (one of my achievements was to be a writer for a digital art festival (which you can see in my blog :) brought their friends, girl/boyfriends, etc to the final event... And surprise, I was the only one alone. Despite I actually invited some people, nobody went. And that's the shit that gets me, I know, I want to be more social, to enjoy life in a different way, but there's fucking something, I guess my bad luck! that fucking prevents it! Really! I know people create their own luck, and I try to create my own, but there are others circumstances I can't control at all. Also, I'm absolutely not the type of people that thinks "the world sucks", not at all; I know life is just life, neutral, each one of us are responsables of what we do with it, independently of our surroundings. I'm really thankful I'm not an african child (with respect), or having some sort of actual mental discapacity. I actually have a really good life, but then again, I have nobody to share my happiness with (apart from my friend). Also, apart from family and stuff, I feel nobody really cares about me :( even if I try to be more social and stuff, they either think I'm weird, or already got a social circle to laugh, love, etc. So yeah, the thing that really upsets me is: Despite trying and trying, despite really wanting to be more social, I still can't, I'm still the one who is left perfectly alone. Yo, really, I just want to feel important to someone else. And yeah, thanks for the advice about seeking professional help, but there's something inside me saying me that I can solve it, I just need to work through it. But I'll try it someday, maybe. Also yes, Stephen, good luck. Cool, dude... Sounds like you've thought a lot about this. And you're right -- good friends (and significant others) are very hard to come by - but don't lose hope. They are out there, and so are you. Eventually you will cross paths with them. =] New FWP: Despite trying to make a conscious change, I feel like I've been an moderate asshole at work recently, and I think at least one of my bosses is losing faith in me in some capacity. I don't mean to do it but my tone sometimes accidentally comes off as irritated or authoritative, even when I just want to share something -- a truly lame FWP that I'll be wrestling with for years, I'm sure, lol. I also feel I am somehow getting worse at my job as time goes on, forgetting random things or making silly but hard-to-fix mistakes...which is frustrating to say the least. Everything is fine, I just feel like I've been making so many friggin mis-steps in my behavior recently, it's getting to me. The kind of inconsequential stuff that still somehow manages to keep you up at night. blargh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
triachus Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 ^ toplol tho I like your avatar... whe can I find it in better quality? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadameChaos Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 trying to impress strangers on the interwebs "seek to express, but not to impress." - confucious Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bechuga Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Initial scans show no abnormalities, bloodwork will take a week or so to show results. That's a huge relief. Still not sure why the sudden mega increase in blood pressure though.. Good news! Best to always check. Perhaps the spike in blood pressure was due to fear of having a brain tumour? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danny O Flannagin Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Cool, dude... Sounds like you've thought a lot about this. And you're right -- good friends (and significant others) are very hard to come by - but don't lose hope. They are out there, and so are you. Eventually you will cross paths with them. =] New FWP: Despite trying to make a conscious change, I feel like I've been an moderate asshole at work recently, and I think at least one of my bosses is losing faith in me in some capacity. I don't mean to do it but my tone sometimes accidentally comes off as irritated or authoritative, even when I just want to share something -- a truly lame FWP that I'll be wrestling with for years, I'm sure, lol. I also feel I am somehow getting worse at my job as time goes on, forgetting random things or making silly but hard-to-fix mistakes...which is frustrating to say the least. Everything is fine, I just feel like I've been making so many friggin mis-steps in my behavior recently, it's getting to me. The kind of inconsequential stuff that still somehow manages to keep you up at night. blargh. Damn, i get this a lot as well. I usually look pissed off or overly serious because i squint a lot especially in the sun so people think I'm mad when I'm really not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KovalainenFanBoy Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Going through the usual breakup/heartbreak bullshit. It's funny cause, while I know this has happened to millions and millions of people, and I know how should I go about this, I still feel like shit and there's nothing I can do about it. I've read a bunch of psychology related stuff about breakups and such and it helps knowing that your situation and feelings are just as clichéd as they can get. But none of that helps when you go to sleep and she comes back from the back of your mind. (trigger warning: I get embarrasingly whiny here for no actual reason) This just mixes in with many other problems such as lack of social skills, living in a region with remarkably high unemployment within a country with remarkably high unemployment overall, lack of motivation in working torwards a degree in a field that highly rewards self-learning and individual drive over academic achievements and in which I don't see myself making a living in, not having a skill, hobby or ability that I feel like working on (which leads to too many years wasted browsing the internet for hours on end) and a preference of whining on music forums over actually working towards fixing completely defeatable issues in my life Actually this has been more of an exercise for me than an actual post that I feel is worth sharing, but I'll just leave it here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bechuga Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
logakght Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! this. I'm trying to be more social right now... its not that I like it, but I think sometimes it is really necessary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KovalainenFanBoy Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! Just reply "that's a very autistic question, how socially unaware are you? stop projecting YOU AUTIST" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bechuga Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! this. I'm trying to be more social right now... its not that I like it, but I think sometimes it is really necessary. Is it? I don't socialize at all and feel much happier than I did when I had people to call. Plus, you don't have to defend your choices or likes or dislikes. And it's not social anxiety or anything: I did have fun bowling with work last year and would go again in a heartbeat but other than that, I rarely feel much impetus to hang out with people. Seems like a waste of time imo. Point: we're all different. If you're forcing yourself into being social when you don't want to, why do it? Life is short enough without putting ourselves through things we dislike. Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! Just reply "that's a very autistic question, how socially unaware are you? stop projecting YOU AUTIST" I have replied previously 'We prefer the term 'autastic' but the joke was not taken as intended. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
triachus Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! Just reply "that's a very autistic question, how socially unaware are you? stop projecting YOU AUTIST" even better, stare your mom dead in the eye and say "it's inheritable, you know" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
logakght Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! this. I'm trying to be more social right now... its not that I like it, but I think sometimes it is really necessary. Is it? I don't socialize at all and feel much happier than I did when I had people to call. Plus, you don't have to defend your choices or likes or dislikes. And it's not social anxiety or anything: I did have fun bowling with work last year and would go again in a heartbeat but other than that, I rarely feel much impetus to hang out with people. Seems like a waste of time imo. Point: we're all different. If you're forcing yourself into being social when you don't want to, why do it? Life is short enough without putting ourselves through things we dislike. Brother's girlfriend asked me privately if I'm autistic because she wasn't sure. In fact, most people ask if I'm autistic at some point or another, even my mom (who has had me tested). I just like solitude dammit! Just reply "that's a very autistic question, how socially unaware are you? stop projecting YOU AUTIST" I have replied previously 'We prefer the term 'autastic' but the joke was not taken as intended. in my case, yeah, sometimes it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bechuga Posted February 13, 2015 Share Posted February 13, 2015 Loga: then all is cool even better, stare your mom dead in the eye and say "it's inheritable, you know" "Thanks for the shit genes, mom!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danny O Flannagin Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 Double dose of rejection from 2 different women. Sometimes just wish i was asexual Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YEK Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 Double dose of rejection from 2 different women. Sometimes just wish i was asexual you could always castrate yourself..but, you may regret it :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest fiznuthian Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 Double dose of rejection from 2 different women. Sometimes just wish i was asexual you could always castrate yourself..but, you may regret it :) worked for me.. 2 ¢ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwmbrancity Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 yet again S'bury's sold out of strawberry sundaes #sadwank Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ambermonk Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 Double dose of rejection from 2 different women. Sometimes just wish i was asexual I honestly don't know if it's better to take a chance and take a hit, or not bother at all in order to avoid damage to ego. My FWP is general silent frustration with humanity today. Facebook news articles are largely littered with irrational if not ignorant comments, and in person I see some form of selfishness or bravado in public behavior almost daily. I guess chaos is inherent to humanity. That or I'm just tired and grumpy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Herr Jan Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 Pre-ordered this in late december through Norman and it keeps getting delayed (now waiting for new covers because the first lot were all botched up) and now someone commented on this stating that these are just low quality mp3's pressed onto a shitty bootleg. Doubting to cancel the order before it's too late. Not the first time I bought shitty record pressing at Norman, I got Steve Pointdexters Work That Mutha with a horrible mp3 glitch on it... No refund or anything from both Norman or Dance Mania. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
usagi Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 stuck in the city at 4am with all the drunks and zombies on V-Day night. on the plus side I had some delicious pancakes and hearty coffee, and earlier in the night I tried mushrooms for the first time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YO303 Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 leaving 70 degrees denver for 20 degrees NJ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hugh Mughnus Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 and earlier in the night I tried mushrooms for the first time. Like psilocybe or.... just regular edible button? stuck in the city at 4am with all the drunks and zombies on V-Day night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
usagi Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 I made it out. I feel like Snake Plissken. the horrors and desolation I have witnessed this night... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cwmbrancity Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 you've seen pretty much all there is to see in that "room" then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now