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stupid first world problems you're dealing with


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i have the pasty legs of a battery farmed turkey, and decided to try a "self tanning lotion" (it puts the lotion on it's skin)

 

now i just look like a battery farm turkey that's been smearing orange shit all over itself. fucking bon mate.

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i have the pasty legs of a battery farmed turkey, and decided to try a "self tanning lotion" (it puts the lotion on it's skin)

 

now i just look like a battery farm turkey that's been smearing orange shit all over itself. fucking bon mate.

 

Just embrace the whiteness

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was taking a whiz a while ago and encounter a really long pube. thought it must be a head hair that got in the undies some how.. so i pulled it out fast.. nope.. it was a pube and attached and plucked out with s typical hair pluck zoink.  i managed to not redirect the stream though. 

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the electrification of Bristol's rail lines

 

the deteriorating quality of our local chippy compounded by finding the ultimately supreme equivalent down the coast, this is serious business

 

summer effectively ending in a few weeks

 

enough free opiates from Britain's NHS to indulge Zammo & a small army, its either all or nothing with this system

 

the cunt roofing his garage @ weekends a few doors down, 8am on Saturday is wrong mate, gonna borrow me Ma's dog and have him leg rape you

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was taking a whiz a while ago and encounter a really long pube. thought it must be a head hair that got in the undies some how.. so i pulled it out fast.. nope.. it was a pube and attached and plucked out with s typical hair pluck zoink.  i managed to not redirect the stream though. 

 

Well done!

I have one chest hair that is about 6 cm long. One time when I was showeing I accidentally wrapped it around my finger and yanked it out. It hurt.

 

 

 

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Because money. I have a friend that had a "blazing row" with a cashier because the slices at 99 Cent Pizza are actually a dollar. She also berated a cashier at Davina's bc he overcharged 5p. Refused to ever do business with the place again, and started walking ~1 mile out of her way to shop at Tesco Express instead.

Edited by doublename
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my retarded toilet keeps backing up, piss water all over the floor  :cisfor:

 

There's a guy in my workplace that lines the toilet seat with paper towels and then flushes them. The plumbing in there is already bad, so it clogs constantly. I've been in there when I was trying to flush and then shit water starts coming out of the drain in the floor :wtf:

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i get really really really bad heartburn/reflux/acid etc.   

 

part of the problem is that i just think its normal for me to be in agony all night after eating something too acidic.    yay I just woke myself up crying  :cerious:

 

lazaprazole works, also milk of magnesia, rennies, gaviscone etc but sometimes I dont have or I forget (or have eaten them all).   I have been known to eat a tablespoon of bicarb just to neutralise the acid.   yay aya

 

 

if you kid suffers with this, get it sorted by a doctor asap because I thought it was normal until let loose into the world in my 20s & living with gfs who told me it isnt normal to cry half the night in your sleep.  its really painful

Edited by lala
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my retarded toilet keeps backing up, piss water all over the floor  :cisfor:

 

There's a guy in my workplace that lines the toilet seat with paper towels and then flushes them. The plumbing in there is already bad, so it clogs constantly. I've been in there when I was trying to flush and then shit water starts coming out of the drain in the floor :wtf:

 

 

Lol, thought San Francisco infrastructure was impeccable.

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i get really really really bad heartburn/reflux/acid etc.   

 

part of the problem is that i just think its normal for me to be in agony all night after eating something too acidic.    yay I just woke myself up crying  :cerious:

 

lazaprazole works, also milk of magnesia, rennies, gaviscone etc but sometimes I dont have or I forget (or have eaten them all).   I have been known to eat a tablespoon of bicarb just to neutralise the acid.   yay aya

 

 

if you kid suffers with this, get it sorted by a doctor asap because I thought it was normal until let loose into the world in my 20s & living with gfs who told me it isnt normal to cry half the night in your sleep.  its really painful

 

drinking apple cider vinegar really helps acid reflux

 

supplementing with betaine hcl will probably normalize the acid levels in your stomach and cure most of the issues

 

eat a decent diet also helps of course

 

contrary to popular understanding acid reflux is caused by the absence of proper levels of acid in the stomach which causes the esophagus to open up and allows acid to touch the sensitive bits

 

adding acid to your stomach in the forms I outline above should improve the situation greatly

 

don't go to doctors trying to heal yourself. drugs don't fix your problems. they mask them.

 

This is a good guide:

 

http://chriskresser.com/get-rid-of-heartburn-and-gerd-forever-in-three-simple-steps/

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Yeah I buy cider vinegar with mother in,  youve just reminded me i need to get another :)

 

i'll try betaine, i hadnt heard of that.  I try to eat a fresh veg diet but I like to drink & eat rich food.  its a bummer

 

 

that article hits the nail on the head straightaway.  I soar when I have a low carb diet, really happy. active, productive.   And yoghurt has always been my breakfast of choice due to it not returning later to attack me.  Nice one, thanks 

Edited by lala
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Yeah I buy cider vinegar with mother in,  youve just reminded me i need to get another :)

 

i'll try betaine, i hadnt heard of that.  I try to eat a fresh veg diet but I like to drink & eat rich food.  its a bummer

 

 

that article hits the nail on the head straightaway.  I soar when I have a low carb diet, really happy. active, productive.   And yoghurt has always been my breakfast of choice due to it not returning later to attack me.  Nice one, thanks 

 

 

Np man, 

 

Hope it helps.

 

I'd read a guide on using betaine before you do.

 

I don't know how much success you'll have using holistic methods if you're still using Rx methods though.

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