stupid first world problems you're dealing with

[ignatius]

12 minutes ago, Squee said:

Damn, now I want to be zapped!

Anyway, thanks for the detailed description
It still hurts a bit. I wonder if it might just have been some sort of muscle spasm. When I went to bed last night it felt like I had a pinched nerve in my back, so I wonder if that had anything to do with it?

But still kinda scary though.

could be. there are things that can mimic some of the heart attack symptoms and pinched nerves are weird like that. i'd still mention all this to your doctor.  i've had muscle spasms in my chest before and upper back pain that knocked the wind out of me where i had to lay on the floor for 30 minutes. i forget what all the heart attack symptoms are but i think a piercing pain that extends through the body into the back is part of it. googling 'heart attack symptoms' will probably just make you worry more. .. but mayo clinic has the basics. 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/heart-attack/in-depth/heart-attack-symptoms/art-20047744

it could just be muscle/skeletal pain. i had all kinds of pain in my rib cage front/back and chest tightness and mentioned this the last time i saw my cardiologist and he said "that's most likely musculoskeletal pain. welcome to being 50". i do have scar tissue there from the heart procedures that fixed the atrial fibrillation and probably a bit of muscle trauma from being shocked like 10 times over the years or whatever. 

i like that musculoskeletal has 'culo' right in the middle. 

getting zapped: they used to use Versed which is good. it's like an amnesia drug and pain med sort of. it keeps you alert but you don't remember anything. nada. then they started using propophol which is incredible. turns out your lights and they bring you back right after.  my ex stayed in the room once when they zapped me and she said the electricity made me sit up and i kinda placed my hand over my chest and said "oh" and then laid back down. 

[luke viia]

lost a last-second ebay bidding war bc my wireless mouse started to die and i couldn't hit "confirm bid" fast enough.

[Squee]

25 minutes ago, luke viia said:

lost a last-second ebay bidding war bc my wireless mouse started to die and i couldn't hit "confirm bid" fast enough.

Oh shit. What were you bidding on?

[luke viia]

a specific GPU i wanted, sigh. guess i'll keep playing isometric RPGs from 10 years ago lol

[user]

I fear my dad has started to develop Korsakoff. He's in his mid 70's and has been a highly functioning alcoholic, although prone to forgetfulness, for as long as I can remember. About 6 years ago or so (my memory isn't all that great either...) he had developed a rare but noticeable tendency to confabulate which had me worried enough to plead with him to see his GP and to stop drinking. Or, at the very least make sure that he would get enough nutrition and get his blood checked every now and then. Much to his and my surprise he managed to pretty much quit drinking entirely and would even go for a yearly check-up. Every year he'd relapse for a week during christmas/new year but I never made a big deal out of it as it didn't seem to lead to more frequent relapses and he appeared to have his health more or less in check.
 

Rest of long-winded oversharing in spoiler.

Spoiler

Our relationship is pretty good but I'm a bit of a flake dealing/preoccupied with my own addictions and being a self-centered man-baby while simultaneously constantly worrying and dreading the moment my dad would start to slip but then soothing myself with the idea that my dad has an active social life and a girlfriend he sees at least twice per week and that by the time my dad would start needing help or whatever I would have my shit together enough to deal with it emotionally and practically and I'd be ready and able to be there for him and help. Very silly, I know.

In hindsight over the last couple of months there were so many warning signs I selfishly downplayed and even the last couple of weeks while things went downhill even more rapidly I failed to see the urgency. This sunday I finally had the nerve to tell my dad I was worried, he acknowledged his memory had recently become worse but my heart sank when he told me that his gf had been getting angry with him because of his forgetfulness, and that he'd had relapsed for several weeks over the last months and even though he'd stopped he hadn't been really bothering to eat well for a much longer period.

He had a doctor's appointment scheduled for this morning. I told myself it would be sufficient to check in with him daily and remind him about the appointment and that he would explicitly mention that he'd been relapsing, not eating well and that his memory had noticeably deteriorated over the last months. This morning when I asked him how it went it was obvious he had either missed his appointment, never made one or decided to not mention most of the things we'd agreed he would. Desperately I tried to avoid sounding accusatory or condescending while he confabulated and tried to act casual and reassuring. We had another conversation a couple of hours ago that revealed even more relapses and additional worrying things and he was overcome by emotions a few times and promised he'd make a new dr's appointment. I've no idea what his assessment of things will be like tomorrow and I've no idea what the fuck I should do as I've clearly misjudged just about everything up to now and I couldn't be further from having even the most basic of my shit together than ever.

 

[ignatius]

13 hours ago, user said:

I fear my dad has started to develop Korsakoff. He's in his mid 70's and has been a highly functioning alcoholic, although prone to forgetfulness, for as long as I can remember. About 6 years ago or so (my memory isn't all that great either...) he had developed a rare but noticeable tendency to confabulate which had me worried enough to plead with him to see his GP and to stop drinking. Or, at the very least make sure that he would get enough nutrition and get his blood checked every now and then. Much to his and my surprise he managed to pretty much quit drinking entirely and would even go for a yearly check-up. Every year he'd relapse for a week during christmas/new year but I never made a big deal out of it as it didn't seem to lead to more frequent relapses and he appeared to have his health more or less in check.
 

Rest of long-winded oversharing in spoiler.

  Reveal hidden contents

Our relationship is pretty good but I'm a bit of a flake dealing/preoccupied with my own addictions and being a self-centered man-baby while simultaneously constantly worrying and dreading the moment my dad would start to slip but then soothing myself with the idea that my dad has an active social life and a girlfriend he sees at least twice per week and that by the time my dad would start needing help or whatever I would have my shit together enough to deal with it emotionally and practically and I'd be ready and able to be there for him and help. Very silly, I know.

In hindsight over the last couple of months there were so many warning signs I selfishly downplayed and even the last couple of weeks while things went downhill even more rapidly I failed to see the urgency. This sunday I finally had the nerve to tell my dad I was worried, he acknowledged his memory had recently become worse but my heart sank when he told me that his gf had been getting angry with him because of his forgetfulness, and that he'd had relapsed for several weeks over the last months and even though he'd stopped he hadn't been really bothering to eat well for a much longer period.

He had a doctor's appointment scheduled for this morning. I told myself it would be sufficient to check in with him daily and remind him about the appointment and that he would explicitly mention that he'd been relapsing, not eating well and that his memory had noticeably deteriorated over the last months. This morning when I asked him how it went it was obvious he had either missed his appointment, never made one or decided to not mention most of the things we'd agreed he would. Desperately I tried to avoid sounding accusatory or condescending while he confabulated and tried to act casual and reassuring. We had another conversation a couple of hours ago that revealed even more relapses and additional worrying things and he was overcome by emotions a few times and promised he'd make a new dr's appointment. I've no idea what his assessment of things will be like tomorrow and I've no idea what the fuck I should do as I've clearly misjudged just about everything up to now and I couldn't be further from having even the most basic of my shit together than ever.

 

oof. heavy. sounds like you're doing a good thing by being in his life and reminding him to do the right things. other than physically taking him to the doctor and making him go to a few AA meetings i don't know what else you can do. dealing w/aging parents w/any kind of health issue is hard. at least you are close enough to talk about these things and be in his life. knowing where/when to draw the line is hard.  

[zero]

13 hours ago, user said:

I've no idea what the fuck I should do as I've clearly misjudged just about everything up to now and I couldn't be further from having even the most basic of my shit together than ever.

may sound harsh, but you coming to the realization there isn't anything you can do about your father's issues is something you should view as a positive. best to figure your own shit out first separately than whatever he's going through. we often times think we can solve other people's problems when we can't...it is up to them to solve their own shit...come to their own rescue, so to speak.

best course of action would be for him to talk to a psychologist/psychiatrist...but I know people don't like doing that. especially people in their 70's. I want my own parents to do this and they won't. my mom says she's been like this all her life (she's 74) and won't change at this point, so I just have to deal with it. I think that's bullshit. it is never too late to change. 

[user]

On 11/25/2022 at 5:14 PM, ignatius said:

oof. heavy. sounds like you're doing a good thing by being in his life and reminding him to do the right things. other than physically taking him to the doctor and making him go to a few AA meetings i don't know what else you can do. dealing w/aging parents w/any kind of health issue is hard. at least you are close enough to talk about these things and be in his life. knowing where/when to draw the line is hard.  

 

On 11/25/2022 at 5:23 PM, zero said:

may sound harsh, but you coming to the realization there isn't anything you can do about your father's issues is something you should view as a positive. best to figure your own shit out first separately than whatever he's going through. we often times think we can solve other people's problems when we can't...it is up to them to solve their own shit...come to their own rescue, so to speak.

best course of action would be for him to talk to a psychologist/psychiatrist...but I know people don't like doing that. especially people in their 70's. I want my own parents to do this and they won't. my mom says she's been like this all her life (she's 74) and won't change at this point, so I just have to deal with it. I think that's bullshit. it is never too late to change. 

Thanks guys, appreciate your insights.

[chenGOD]

Ugh my illegal soccer streams all keep buffering today. My suffering is real.

[cern]

So disappointed today!
I was gonna go for a job interview..
And I COULD NOT FIND THE GOD DAMN OFFICE! I Was wandering around a park area behind a hotel and the workers there looked I at me like "Are you lost or something?" She said behind the Hotel But what she actually ment was: Inside the Hotel and the entrance is on the back side. 
So fail 
I got canceled because of this, but Im gonna go there again on Thursday.. now I know where it is at least. 

[luke viia]

going back to college, it's three weeks before classes start, and just got a call from my landlord that they're terminating my lease

i live in a rent controlled (read: affordable) situation and can't afford to both go back to school and live somewhere else right now

really have no idea what i'm gonna do

[ignatius]

19 minutes ago, luke viia said:

going back to college, it's three weeks before classes start, and just got a call from my landlord that they're terminating my lease

i live in a rent controlled (read: affordable) situation and can't afford to both go back to school and live somewhere else right now

really have no idea what i'm gonna do

fuck that sucks. can a landlord just do that out of the blue? 

[YEK]

I just bought a new iPhone and I'm picky how my icons are arranged on my home screen

is it possible for example to have two columns of icons going doing the left and right side of the screen or do they have to be all bunched together? I’d like them to be able to breathe 

[luke viia]

7 minutes ago, ignatius said:

fuck that sucks. can a landlord just do that out of the blue? 

thx man. i'm month to month at this point, and the eviction is related to an old & wacky water supply issue that is likely not 100% legal (on the LL's part) but is also something i have no control over, so the landlord is being forced to basically shut the water off to the premises while they install a well or something legit for the property... which means no tenants for a while. they might let me back after a year or so - they like me as a tenant - but idk, not something i can count on. i like them as landlords too, so i don't want to make a bit legal fight out of it. i dunno what i'd gain from that anyway. this basically all boils down to a certain neighbor being a dick about the situation.

just really wasn't expecting that phone call... took me by surprise. i legally am entitled to 30 days to move at least, but lol at my landlord's rep saying "if you can find something in the next few days let me know." like buddy, pretty clear you haven't had to find a rental in the PNW in the last decade. happy holidays

[ignatius]

so, 3 different healthcare people, my primary doc, physical therapist, orthopedic specialist, have suggested the diagnosis for my shoulder that it happened as a result of the flu shot i got when the needle went too deep in wrong place and pierced the bursa in the shoulder.  the ortho even wrote a paper about this diagnosis and his colleagues said it was not a thing because there's not enough cases to prove it happens. the physical therapist said that that world just hasn't caught up to reality yet and cases are many even happening to one of his coworkers. when i looked on line there's tons of people w/same issue after getting vaccine done by someone not paying attention or not well trained. 

so, i have to do PT for a while then go back in 3 months to the ortho if needed and if not better by then i can get a steroid injection into my shoulder. doc said it's ironic the possible fix for this is an injection.. but said it's the only thing that will really knock down the inflammation if it's not gone by then. 

still unable to sleep well. been up since about 4am and woke up like 3 or 4 times.. went to bed around 8pm or something.. so tired. this shit blows. 

[Wunderbar]

15 minutes ago, ignatius said:

so, 3 different healthcare people, my primary doc, physical therapist, orthopedic specialist, have suggested the diagnosis for my shoulder that it happened as a result of the flu shot i got when the needle went too deep in wrong place and pierced the bursa in the shoulder.  the ortho even wrote a paper about this diagnosis and his colleagues said it was not a thing because there's not enough cases to prove it happens. the physical therapist said that that world just hasn't caught up to reality yet and cases are many even happening to one of his coworkers. when i looked on line there's tons of people w/same issue after getting vaccine done by someone not paying attention or not well trained. 

so, i have to do PT for a while then go back in 3 months to the ortho if needed and if not better by then i can get a steroid injection into my shoulder. doc said it's ironic the possible fix for this is an injection.. but said it's the only thing that will really knock down the inflammation if it's not gone by then. 

still unable to sleep well. been up since about 4am and woke up like 3 or 4 times.. went to bed around 8pm or something.. so tired. this shit blows. 

We should just get heroin junkies to inject everyone.

[ignatius]

11 minutes ago, Wunderbar said:

We should just get heroin junkies to inject everyone.

vaccines don't go into the veins though.  

i think the pharmacies/docs should switch from arm and just inject into the ass cheek. 

[milkface]

Broke as fuck rn

[BobDobalina]

13 hours ago, ignatius said:

i think the pharmacies/docs should switch from arm and just inject into the ass cheek. 

I do this every night with your son

12 hours ago, milkface said:

Broke as fuck rn

Cya in the 2nDD world homie 

[luke viia]

apartment hunting suuuucks

just got back from checking out the best lead i had, and turns out that it's A) probably not available anymore even though it isn't even publicly advertised, B) has no laundry access, C) is maybe 220sqft total, D) is directly across the street from an abandoned school with a shit ton of broken windows, a big prison-style fence, and graffiti all over it including the words "cum on me" directly visible from the place i'd be renting. $1000/month

[Squee]

I’m at the doctors and I’m supposed to deliver a urine sample but I CAN’T!

Also, why are people in the waiting room so fucking weird. Everyone is mumbling to themselves. 

[Squee]

Also, everyone is either watching TikTok shit or listening to music on their phone and playing that crap out loud. What is wrong with people?

[ignatius]

10 hours ago, Squee said:

Also, everyone is either watching TikTok shit or listening to music on their phone and playing that crap out loud. What is wrong with people?

dude. so at my subsistence level part time job people do this and it's fucking annoying. like 3 people listening on things on their phones and in multiple languages.. then also in multiple languages talking like no one else is around and it doesn't matter because no one understands them etc.. then other people speaking in a different language talk over those people and it's all kind of amazing and i wish i knew what everyone was saying because i'm curious how they'd overlap.. but w/tiktok shit going off in the middle of it it kind of ruins the jazz-like conversation aspect of it for my brain. 

still, the dude playing an imam reading/singing the quran as it's done.. was pretty cool sounding as the guy had a really perfect lyrical voice/quality to it. no idea what was being said of course but it was relaxing especially w/what else was happening around the space i was in. 

edit: my fwp.. car battery keeps dying because i don't drive enough. 

Edited December 21, 2022 by ignatius

[Squee]

10 minutes ago, ignatius said:

dude. so at my subsistence level part time job people do this and it's fucking annoying. like 3 people listening on things on their phones and in multiple languages.. then also in multiple languages talking like no one else is around and it doesn't matter because no one understands them etc.. then other people speaking in a different language talk over those people and it's all kind of amazing and i wish i knew what everyone was saying because i'm curious how they'd overlap.. but w/tiktok shit going off in the middle of it it kind of ruins the jazz-like conversation aspect of it for my brain. 

still, the dude playing an imam reading/singing the quran as it's done.. was pretty cool sounding as the guy had a really perfect lyrical voice/quality to it. no idea what was being said of course but it was relaxing especially w/what else was happening around the space i was in. 

That sounds exactly like what I experienced today.
Just add a kid walking around coughing and sneezing everywhere and his mother walking behind him asking, "Where are you going? Where are you going? What do you see?"

[ignatius]

freezing rain them some snow then freezing rain.. so, ice dams in the gutters. spent a few hours in the cold rain on a ladder clearing ice dams in the gutters. there's a covered patio in the back. the person who built the roof over it didn't properly seal it where it meets the siding.. so when the water isn't going where it's supposed to go (the gutters) because of ice dams in the gutters.. it backs up and pours down the siding.. which wouldn't be a problem except for the length of the header attached to the roof that covers the patio. some amount of water got in there and tripped a breaker so a few lights and plugs aren't working in the back of the house which is where my bedroom is. 

i broke up all the ice on the patio roof and cleared the ice dams so the water is going where it's supposed to. the breaker won't reset though. have to wait a while for it to dry out. this means the moisture in the wall is probably causing other problems. there's no leaks into the house anywhere but i imagine there's mold that's gonna happen. Also, need to wait for it to be dry enough for the breaker not to trip. 

so, that means my summer house project $$$$ has emerged and i get to figure out how to seal behind a thing already built.. which means i'll have to take part of it apart, hire someone to do parts of it most likely and i'm annoyed to fuck even thinking about it... also annoyed because i was cold af for a while and on an ice up mostly flat part of the patio roof in the rain and wind shoveling blocks of ice that formed over the gutters and built up under the gutters between the roof and the gutters and my back is tired, i'm tired. i'm annoyed. 

fwp af though.  only one breaker tripped which is good. no other water issues in relation to the gutters. usually if they're blocked the water just spills over onto the ground. 

i could go on but i've said too much. 

merry xmas.