All About iPhones

[jules]

SO, uh, are they just gonna ignore 9 or is the 9 coming after the X? I thought that the X was called the X but they kept saying ten.

 

Also, wireless charging with the charger coming next year?

 

 

What?

[Braintree]

Maybe it's a variable.

[chassis]

Windows 98, windows XP

[auxien]

Apple is just following Microsoft, who are obviously now the real trailblazers, in shaming the number 9.

 

/sarcasm

 

(mostly)

 

But I physically guffawed twice during their X presentation: first, when the fucking thing didn't even work the first time, and second when that guy was explaining how 'easy' opening the X is because of the facial recognition. "You just tap or raise it, then look directly at it, then swipe up! It's so easy!" Instead of....touching a button? How is all that motion and bullshit easier than just literally touching a finger to a button. 

[DavieAddison]

The NSA is collectively creaming in their pants at the idea of Face ID.

[auxien]

The NSA is collectively creaming in their pants at the idea of Face ID.

Apple says all facial data is stored in the phone only and never transmitted elsewhere. I believe them, however, who's to say someone couldn't take that information off the phone if they needed it? But wouldn't it just be easier to scan a person's face directly then hacking into their phone to steal their face data? I dunno.

 

Also I forgot to mention how hilarious it still is to see hundreds upon hundreds of people clapping for the most inane things, like product updates, Apple store openings, and ridiculous consumer level shit. 

[Joyrex]

Apple is just following Microsoft, who are obviously now the real trailblazers, in shaming the number 9.

 

/sarcasm

 

(mostly)

 

But I physically guffawed twice during their X presentation: first, when the fucking thing didn't even work the first time, and second when that guy was explaining how 'easy' opening the X is because of the facial recognition. "You just tap or raise it, then look directly at it, then swipe up! It's so easy!" Instead of....touching a button? How is all that motion and bullshit easier than just literally touching a finger to a button. 

Dollars to doughnuts says the "swipe up to unlock" will eventually be a setting where you can just look, unlock and go straight to your homescreen.

 

SO, uh, are they just gonna ignore 9 or is the 9 coming after the X? I thought that the X was called the X but they kept saying ten.

 

Also, wireless charging with the charger coming next year?

 

 

What?

Wireless charging works on the Qi standard; any wireless charger using that standard nowadays will work with iPhone 8/X. IKEA even sells one!

 

 

The NSA is collectively creaming in their pants at the idea of Face ID.

Apple says all facial data is stored in the phone only and never transmitted elsewhere. I believe them, however, who's to say someone couldn't take that information off the phone if they needed it? But wouldn't it just be easier to scan a person's face directly then hacking into their phone to steal their face data? I dunno.

 

Also I forgot to mention how hilarious it still is to see hundreds upon hundreds of people clapping for the most inane things, like product updates, Apple store openings, and ridiculous consumer level shit. 

 

Facial data is probably useless for anyone to steal; Apple claims they worked with Hollywood mask makers to see if they can fool the cameras with masks, as it requires 'attention' (e.g., movement I would guess) for the device to recognize and unlock.

 

I hope they tested it with dark-skinned people; that would be embarrassing if someone with dark skin couldn't unlock their phone in the dark or low light conditions where the edges of the face may not be clearly visible.

 

The new animoji are pure nightmare fuel.

[caze]

I hope they tested it with dark-skinned people; that would be embarrassing if someone with dark skin couldn't unlock their phone in the dark or low light conditions where the edges of the face may not be clearly visible.

The system Windows uses requires an infrared camera, having one of them would get around that problem.

[auxien]

Yeah they mentioned in the presentation the facial recognition is IR or something, works in the dark.

 

From what I gathered, it's mapping the physical layout of your face in 3D, so color of skin wouldn't effect that. I think?

[Rubin Farr]

but when will it get dick recognition

[Joyrex]

but when will it get dick recognition

Isn't that how most iPhone owners unlock their phones... am I doing something wrong with Touch ID?

[maitake]

I prefer the fingerprint scanners that sit concave on the back of phones.. It's very natural to slide your finger into it when holding the phone in different ways. 

The FaceID thing is cool though. Looks like the X is pretty loaded, but it better be for that price tag. 

[KovalainenFanBoy]

I prefer the fingerprint scanners that sit concave on the back of phones.. It's very natural to slide your finger into it when holding the phone in different ways. 

The FaceID thing is cool though. Looks like the X is pretty loaded, but it better be for that price tag. 

 

yea the fingerprint scanner on the (relatively) cheapo Redmi Note 3 is like magic, recognizes the fingerprint in a millisecond and you dont even have to fiddle with it or anything, it's pure magic and so ergonomic. I don't see how Apple can improve that

[fumi]

I'm a fan of Apple products but I have bought anything from them in a while.

 

That keynote was truly the most obnoxious thing I've ever seen from them. The level of self-congratulatory speeches, Tim Cook's empty platitudes to hurricane victims, some Apple woman telling everyone the store are now called Market Places or some other crap. All those Apple fanboys and employees whooping and hollering at the most inane things.

 

I think what I hate the most is the sanctimonious way people like these Tech CEOs evangelise about changing the world, freeing people's creativity, making the world a better place. The only people who benefit are those up on the stage and a handful of wealthy shareholders.

 

Tim Cook talking about Apple Retail Stores as somewhere to let people free their creativity.

 

Fucking LOL. No, the stores exist to make money. Nothing else. Absolutely nothing else. Everything the company does is to make money. 

 

I must be just me getting old but I was watching this while also watching live TV. One screen, I see these people self-congratulating themselves, drowning in money and spending their time creating animated poo emoji on $1000 dollar phones while on the BBC News, I'm watching people with no food or water in Bangladesh, living in mountains of filth and disease.

 

We live in unequal times. That's not Apple's or any other tech companies fault but showing a good deal more restraint and humility and not a giant circular shrine of glass costing billions might be better in our times.

Edited September 12, 2017 by fumi

[maitake]

 

I prefer the fingerprint scanners that sit concave on the back of phones.. It's very natural to slide your finger into it when holding the phone in different ways. 

The FaceID thing is cool though. Looks like the X is pretty loaded, but it better be for that price tag. 

 

yea the fingerprint scanner on the (relatively) cheapo Redmi Note 3 is like magic, recognizes the fingerprint in a millisecond and you dont even have to fiddle with it or anything, it's pure magic and so ergonomic. I don't see how Apple can improve that

 

 

Yup they're fantastic. Fully unlocks in a split second and you're doing your thing. There's no way i'd prefer FaceID. Though, it does seem Apple is trying to make the FaceID process secure enough to pay for stuff with, etc. Maybe that's what they are going for. It's probably that something like FaceID is more secure than a fingerprint scanner. 

[oscillik]

 

I'm a fan of Apple products but I have bought anything from them in a while.

 

That keynote was truly the most obnoxious thing I've ever seen from them. The level of self-congratulatory speeches, Tim Cook's empty platitudes to hurricane victims, some Apple woman telling everyone the store are now called Market Places or some other crap. All those Apple fanboys and employees whooping and hollering at the most inane things.

 

I think what I hate the most is the sanctimonious way people like these Tech CEOs evangelise about changing the world, freeing people's creativity, making the world a better place. The only people who benefit are those up on the stage and a handful of wealthy shareholders.

 

Tim Cook talking about Apple Retail Stores as somewhere to let people free their creativity.

 

Fucking LOL. No, the stores exist to make money. Nothing else. Absolutely nothing else. Everything the company does is to make money. 

 

I must be just me getting old but I was watching this while also watching live TV. One screen, I see these people self-congratulating themselves, drowning in money and spending their time creating animated poo emoji on $1000 dollar phones while on the BBC News, I'm watching people with no food or water in Bangladesh, living in mountains of filth and disease.

 

We live in unequal times. That's not Apple's or any other tech companies fault but showing a good deal more restraint and humility and not a giant circular shrine of glass costing billions might be better in our times.

 

 

I get what you're saying, and in some way agree with you.

 

But while I agree with you that some of these companies and CEOs self-aggrandise themselves and/or their companies way too much, I think they do help many people unlock their creativity.

 

In much the same way as the Amiga did for many youngsters back in the day, having access to a computer that can assist you in trying your hand at music, digital art, photography, etc....that's a big deal.

 

I've been very vocal in the past about disliking Apple products. But there's one thing I cannot deny, and that is that computers (and not just Apple's, btw) have enriched my life and given me the tools to be creative in ways that would've been prohibitively more expensive or difficult to do otherwise.

 

But then again, I don't go evangelising things like I'm a member of a cult either, so...

 

Yeah. I agree with you. But I disagree with you. But I agree with you...

[fumi]

 

 

I'm a fan of Apple products but I have bought anything from them in a while.

 

That keynote was truly the most obnoxious thing I've ever seen from them. The level of self-congratulatory speeches, Tim Cook's empty platitudes to hurricane victims, some Apple woman telling everyone the store are now called Market Places or some other crap. All those Apple fanboys and employees whooping and hollering at the most inane things.

 

I think what I hate the most is the sanctimonious way people like these Tech CEOs evangelise about changing the world, freeing people's creativity, making the world a better place. The only people who benefit are those up on the stage and a handful of wealthy shareholders.

 

Tim Cook talking about Apple Retail Stores as somewhere to let people free their creativity.

 

Fucking LOL. No, the stores exist to make money. Nothing else. Absolutely nothing else. Everything the company does is to make money. 

 

I must be just me getting old but I was watching this while also watching live TV. One screen, I see these people self-congratulating themselves, drowning in money and spending their time creating animated poo emoji on $1000 dollar phones while on the BBC News, I'm watching people with no food or water in Bangladesh, living in mountains of filth and disease.

 

We live in unequal times. That's not Apple's or any other tech companies fault but showing a good deal more restraint and humility and not a giant circular shrine of glass costing billions might be better in our times.

 

 

I get what you're saying, and in some way agree with you.

 

But while I agree with you that some of these companies and CEOs self-aggrandise themselves and/or their companies way too much, I think they do help many people unlock their creativity.

 

In much the same way as the Amiga did for many youngsters back in the day, having access to a computer that can assist you in trying your hand at music, digital art, photography, etc....that's a big deal.

 

I've been very vocal in the past about disliking Apple products. But there's one thing I cannot deny, and that is that computers (and not just Apple's, btw) have enriched my life and given me the tools to be creative in ways that would've been prohibitively more expensive or difficult to do otherwise.

 

But then again, I don't go evangelising things like I'm a member of a cult either, so...

 

Yeah. I agree with you. But I disagree with you. But I agree with you...

 

 

Yeah, I know what you mean. They do create very nice products that work well and so forth. They are the best, IMO.

 

This article on The Verge explains my point better than I can.

 

 

Excruciating self-congratulation has always been part of Apple’s brand, but the company took this to new levels at today’s iPhone event.

 

It started with a tribute to Steve Jobs that was unnerving in the depth of its veneration. As smiling photos of the company founder beamed down at the audience, we were told that Apple is not, in fact, one of the richest and most influential corporations of all time, but the embodiment of one man’s creative spirit. The revenue, the supply chains, the employees, the users — all an incarnation of Jobs.

 

“His greatest expression would not be a singular product, but rather Apple itself,” said Cook.

 

Even the auditorium the event took place in was framed as a mausoleum. It’s the last creative project touched by Jobs’ genius, we were told, and look how it shelters the faithful, called here to see the latest relics the great man bequeathed to the Earth.

 

And then things got really crazy.

 

After Tim Cook had finished his opening tribute, Apple SVP Angela Ahrendts got onstage and announced that the company would be calling its stores “town squares” from now on. (Never mind that Cook referred to them as “stores” just moments before.) Those shops you go to to buy a Mac or haggle over a broken phone screen should, and will be, much more than that, said Ahrendts: “They are gathering places.”

 

She went on to describe how Apple Stores will transform from simply commercial spaces to locations where the company will develop “communities”: host concerts, lead workshops, offer up meeting rooms, and teach everything from coding to photography to music-making. Apple frames these disciplines as modern equivalents to the Medieval trivium — an essential educational resource that makes a person a person.

 

Above all, said Ahrendts, Apple wants its stores to be places to hang out. Places you go to because everyone needs somewhere to be other than their home and office. We were told to “imagine movie night" in an Apple store, and shown how the company’s latest space would “transform [Chicago’s] riverfront." Like Uber moving into public transport and Google bringing back the company town, Apple, too, wants to reconfigure civic life around itself and its ideals.

 

 

Today, we saw Apple evangelism on a grand scale. The company has always been defined in part by onanism and self-congratulation, but has managed a certain degree of self-awareness. This year, it jumped the shark.

[fumi]

 

 

I prefer the fingerprint scanners that sit concave on the back of phones.. It's very natural to slide your finger into it when holding the phone in different ways. 

The FaceID thing is cool though. Looks like the X is pretty loaded, but it better be for that price tag. 

 

yea the fingerprint scanner on the (relatively) cheapo Redmi Note 3 is like magic, recognizes the fingerprint in a millisecond and you dont even have to fiddle with it or anything, it's pure magic and so ergonomic. I don't see how Apple can improve that

 

 

Yup they're fantastic. Fully unlocks in a split second and you're doing your thing. There's no way i'd prefer FaceID. Though, it does seem Apple is trying to make the FaceID process secure enough to pay for stuff with, etc. Maybe that's what they are going for. It's probably that something like FaceID is more secure than a fingerprint scanner. 

 

 

My own impression is that (like the Touch ID before it), this year's phone will be so that users can iron out all the faults with it. And Apple can improve it and then charge you more money next time.

 

You just know that this time next year, one of their Execs is going to be up on stage saying how magical the iPhone 11 is and how it has much faster face-recognition than the iPhone X.

[koolkeyZ865]

It's amazing how such a disgusting company can come out with some of the best products on the market. Well, Macs, at least.

 

EDIT: Not sure about this iPhone business, the only thing I'd care for would be an SE or something. "Animojis" fucking lol

Edited September 12, 2017 by clarktrent

[oscillik]

 

 

 

I'm a fan of Apple products but I have bought anything from them in a while.

 

That keynote was truly the most obnoxious thing I've ever seen from them. The level of self-congratulatory speeches, Tim Cook's empty platitudes to hurricane victims, some Apple woman telling everyone the store are now called Market Places or some other crap. All those Apple fanboys and employees whooping and hollering at the most inane things.

 

I think what I hate the most is the sanctimonious way people like these Tech CEOs evangelise about changing the world, freeing people's creativity, making the world a better place. The only people who benefit are those up on the stage and a handful of wealthy shareholders.

 

Tim Cook talking about Apple Retail Stores as somewhere to let people free their creativity.

 

Fucking LOL. No, the stores exist to make money. Nothing else. Absolutely nothing else. Everything the company does is to make money. 

 

I must be just me getting old but I was watching this while also watching live TV. One screen, I see these people self-congratulating themselves, drowning in money and spending their time creating animated poo emoji on $1000 dollar phones while on the BBC News, I'm watching people with no food or water in Bangladesh, living in mountains of filth and disease.

 

We live in unequal times. That's not Apple's or any other tech companies fault but showing a good deal more restraint and humility and not a giant circular shrine of glass costing billions might be better in our times.

 

 

I get what you're saying, and in some way agree with you.

 

But while I agree with you that some of these companies and CEOs self-aggrandise themselves and/or their companies way too much, I think they do help many people unlock their creativity.

 

In much the same way as the Amiga did for many youngsters back in the day, having access to a computer that can assist you in trying your hand at music, digital art, photography, etc....that's a big deal.

 

I've been very vocal in the past about disliking Apple products. But there's one thing I cannot deny, and that is that computers (and not just Apple's, btw) have enriched my life and given me the tools to be creative in ways that would've been prohibitively more expensive or difficult to do otherwise.

 

But then again, I don't go evangelising things like I'm a member of a cult either, so...

 

Yeah. I agree with you. But I disagree with you. But I agree with you...

 

 

Yeah, I know what you mean. They do create very nice products that work well and so forth. They are the best, IMO.

 

This article on The Verge explains my point better than I can.

 

 

Excruciating self-congratulation has always been part of Apple’s brand, but the company took this to new levels at today’s iPhone event.

 

It started with a tribute to Steve Jobs that was unnerving in the depth of its veneration. As smiling photos of the company founder beamed down at the audience, we were told that Apple is not, in fact, one of the richest and most influential corporations of all time, but the embodiment of one man’s creative spirit. The revenue, the supply chains, the employees, the users — all an incarnation of Jobs.

 

“His greatest expression would not be a singular product, but rather Apple itself,” said Cook.

 

Even the auditorium the event took place in was framed as a mausoleum. It’s the last creative project touched by Jobs’ genius, we were told, and look how it shelters the faithful, called here to see the latest relics the great man bequeathed to the Earth.

 

And then things got really crazy.

 

After Tim Cook had finished his opening tribute, Apple SVP Angela Ahrendts got onstage and announced that the company would be calling its stores “town squares” from now on. (Never mind that Cook referred to them as “stores” just moments before.) Those shops you go to to buy a Mac or haggle over a broken phone screen should, and will be, much more than that, said Ahrendts: “They are gathering places.”

 

She went on to describe how Apple Stores will transform from simply commercial spaces to locations where the company will develop “communities”: host concerts, lead workshops, offer up meeting rooms, and teach everything from coding to photography to music-making. Apple frames these disciplines as modern equivalents to the Medieval trivium — an essential educational resource that makes a person a person.

 

Above all, said Ahrendts, Apple wants its stores to be places to hang out. Places you go to because everyone needs somewhere to be other than their home and office. We were told to “imagine movie night" in an Apple store, and shown how the company’s latest space would “transform [Chicago’s] riverfront." Like Uber moving into public transport and Google bringing back the company town, Apple, too, wants to reconfigure civic life around itself and its ideals.

 

 

Today, we saw Apple evangelism on a grand scale. The company has always been defined in part by onanism and self-congratulation, but has managed a certain degree of self-awareness. This year, it jumped the shark.

 

Haha.

 

Yeah, I went into the Apple stores market squares in Liverpool and Manchester, and the layout of them is done so it's like a fucking meet place. There are no longer any cashier tills, because you just grab the nearest store market square employee and they dooty-do-do with their iPhones and you're done.

 

Edit: Amiga never self-aggrandised anywhere near as much as Apple do.

Edited September 12, 2017 by oscillik

[KovalainenFanBoy]

can't wait for The Animoji Movie

[fumi]

 

 

 

 

I'm a fan of Apple products but I have bought anything from them in a while.

 

That keynote was truly the most obnoxious thing I've ever seen from them. The level of self-congratulatory speeches, Tim Cook's empty platitudes to hurricane victims, some Apple woman telling everyone the store are now called Market Places or some other crap. All those Apple fanboys and employees whooping and hollering at the most inane things.

 

I think what I hate the most is the sanctimonious way people like these Tech CEOs evangelise about changing the world, freeing people's creativity, making the world a better place. The only people who benefit are those up on the stage and a handful of wealthy shareholders.

 

Tim Cook talking about Apple Retail Stores as somewhere to let people free their creativity.

 

Fucking LOL. No, the stores exist to make money. Nothing else. Absolutely nothing else. Everything the company does is to make money. 

 

I must be just me getting old but I was watching this while also watching live TV. One screen, I see these people self-congratulating themselves, drowning in money and spending their time creating animated poo emoji on $1000 dollar phones while on the BBC News, I'm watching people with no food or water in Bangladesh, living in mountains of filth and disease.

 

We live in unequal times. That's not Apple's or any other tech companies fault but showing a good deal more restraint and humility and not a giant circular shrine of glass costing billions might be better in our times.

 

 

I get what you're saying, and in some way agree with you.

 

But while I agree with you that some of these companies and CEOs self-aggrandise themselves and/or their companies way too much, I think they do help many people unlock their creativity.

 

In much the same way as the Amiga did for many youngsters back in the day, having access to a computer that can assist you in trying your hand at music, digital art, photography, etc....that's a big deal.

 

I've been very vocal in the past about disliking Apple products. But there's one thing I cannot deny, and that is that computers (and not just Apple's, btw) have enriched my life and given me the tools to be creative in ways that would've been prohibitively more expensive or difficult to do otherwise.

 

But then again, I don't go evangelising things like I'm a member of a cult either, so...

 

Yeah. I agree with you. But I disagree with you. But I agree with you...

 

 

Yeah, I know what you mean. They do create very nice products that work well and so forth. They are the best, IMO.

 

This article on The Verge explains my point better than I can.

 

 

Excruciating self-congratulation has always been part of Apple’s brand, but the company took this to new levels at today’s iPhone event.

 

It started with a tribute to Steve Jobs that was unnerving in the depth of its veneration. As smiling photos of the company founder beamed down at the audience, we were told that Apple is not, in fact, one of the richest and most influential corporations of all time, but the embodiment of one man’s creative spirit. The revenue, the supply chains, the employees, the users — all an incarnation of Jobs.

 

“His greatest expression would not be a singular product, but rather Apple itself,” said Cook.

 

Even the auditorium the event took place in was framed as a mausoleum. It’s the last creative project touched by Jobs’ genius, we were told, and look how it shelters the faithful, called here to see the latest relics the great man bequeathed to the Earth.

 

And then things got really crazy.

 

After Tim Cook had finished his opening tribute, Apple SVP Angela Ahrendts got onstage and announced that the company would be calling its stores “town squares” from now on. (Never mind that Cook referred to them as “stores” just moments before.) Those shops you go to to buy a Mac or haggle over a broken phone screen should, and will be, much more than that, said Ahrendts: “They are gathering places.”

 

She went on to describe how Apple Stores will transform from simply commercial spaces to locations where the company will develop “communities”: host concerts, lead workshops, offer up meeting rooms, and teach everything from coding to photography to music-making. Apple frames these disciplines as modern equivalents to the Medieval trivium — an essential educational resource that makes a person a person.

 

Above all, said Ahrendts, Apple wants its stores to be places to hang out. Places you go to because everyone needs somewhere to be other than their home and office. We were told to “imagine movie night" in an Apple store, and shown how the company’s latest space would “transform [Chicago’s] riverfront." Like Uber moving into public transport and Google bringing back the company town, Apple, too, wants to reconfigure civic life around itself and its ideals.

 

 

Today, we saw Apple evangelism on a grand scale. The company has always been defined in part by onanism and self-congratulation, but has managed a certain degree of self-awareness. This year, it jumped the shark.

 

Haha.

 

Yeah, I went into the Apple stores market squares in Liverpool and Manchester, and the layout of them is done so it's like a fucking meet place. There are no longer any cashier tills, because you just grab the nearest store market square employee and they dooty-do-do with their iPhones and you're done.

 

Edit: Amiga never self-aggrandised anywhere near as much as Apple do.

 

 

Apple feels it is invincible now. History dictates otherwise.

[jules]

i can't believe there aren't memes already with the dude demonstrating those animoji nightmares.

 

I can already see people doing that shit on the train and it's unnerving...

[modey]

Not sure about this iPhone business, the only thing I'd care for would be an SE or something. 

The SE is great. Perfect form factor imo. Hopefully mine lasts a while; when it's time for upgrade I may actually move to android just for the headphone port lol. We'll see.

[zaphod]

 

 

I hope they tested it with dark-skinned people; that would be embarrassing if someone with dark skin couldn't unlock their phone in the dark or low light conditions where the edges of the face may not be clearly visible.

 

 

how dark we talkin